SRS lost

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by lola83, Jun 9, 2006.

  1. lola83

    lola83 New Member

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    hi guys, i just need some help at the moment.
    my brother committed suicide last week. i was just wondering if anyone knows any support groups or anyone i could talk to online (im seeing a counsellor), i just want to talk with people who have been through the same thing, to help the grieving process if you will. im so lost and confused right now, that im willing to reach out and just try to come to grips as in why this has happened.
    if anyone could help, that would be fantastic.
     
  2. tenxia

    tenxia OT Supporter

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  3. vitamin dew

    vitamin dew New Member

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    :hug: I can't say that I completely know how you feel, because something like that hasnt happened in my family. But I do have friends who have lost a family member in the same way.
     
  4. deusexaethera

    deusexaethera OT Supporter

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    Don't stop talking until you feel better, even if at some points you want to keep your thoughts to yourself. Just about the worst thing for you in the next few months would be to not have other people's help keeping your perspective.
     
  5. KatWoman

    KatWoman •••••••••••

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    I'm very sorry to hear this :hug: Perhaps you can check out a support group such Survivors of Suicide and see if they have an active chapter/group in your area. I had a friend in high school whose family participated in this when her brother did the same :hs:

    http://www.survivorsofsuicide.com/

    I didn't look through the entire site, but I hope this will offer some help.

    :hug:
     
  6. lola83

    lola83 New Member

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    thanks guys so much, ill check it out now.
    xxx
     
  7. Hello Kitty

    Hello Kitty New Member

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    Ask your therapist for advice on finding an online group. My prayers are with you and your family
     
  8. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Damn...I am so sorry to hear that. My bro did the same thing 20 years ago. It's srsly fucked up and there wasn't anything but a stupid reason behind it.

    The good thing is you are talking about it and seeking help. I didn't and it cost me a lot....I finally ended up going to counseling like 10 years after but by then a lot of shit had happened in my own life. Instead of talking, I turned to drugs and alcohol and I do NOT recommend that. I would suggest that you don't get drunk for awhile....like maybe 6 months or a year......simply because of what I went through. It's not worth it.

    Churches have support groups also....sometimes they are just grief support groups not specific to suicide but still, they might help. You may try the suicide prevention hotline and ask them if they have any numbers for support groups.

    I've had 3 people that were very close to me die and all of my grief process were different. It takes a long time to get over and you can't rush the process. There will be good days and bad days.....days when you feel like your old self and you are happy again.....then at a moments notice, you'll be in tears wondering WTF just happened.

    It's the process of grief that's happening.....don't try to stop it, just allow yourself to grieve. It doesn't mean anything other then you are grieving and that whole process is confusing and difficult. Crying doesn't mean you are weak...it's normal and natural to cry. Also you don't have to make any major decisions right now....perhaps those should be postponed for when you are feeling better. Right now the grief is probably too present and too powerful.

    It will be ok...it will get better. I promise!

    Doing healthy things like exercising, hanging out with friends and family are all very healing. I found a lot of comfort watching baseball....I was never a fan but it was the only thing that gave me peace...it was amazingly relaxing. I still don't watch much baseball but I can remember very clearly turning it on and just going....ahhhhh...finally....some peace.

    I also found music and movies to be a nice escape.

    My mom liked a book called, The Courage To Grieve by Judy Tatelbaum here's the amazon link:

    http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0060911859/sr=8-1/qid=1150132656/ref=pd_bbs_1/104-8710524-7283900?%5Fencoding=UTF8

    The next few months will be a rollercoaster ride of emotions and not a very fun rollercoaster. Suicide is a very difficult because the question of WHY is always present. There is usually not a single, simple answer to this question. The truth is noone knows for sure except the departed. Unfortunatly they have left behind a scar that may never fully heal.

    I can assure you that although you may never fully heal (as if it never happened) you can go on with life....even if it seems utterly impossible right now. Just take it one day at a time, don't get on your own case for making mistakes or forgetting things or not being perfect....try to be good to yourself and realize that you are hurting and trying to heal. It may take a very long time.

    I'll be praying for you and your family.
     

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