SRS Lost and clueless about relationships / love

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by depressed, Feb 23, 2006.

  1. depressed

    depressed New Member

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    Usually I have a level head about all situations. In past relationships, I could sort out the scumbags from the nice guys. So why is it so hard this time?

    I recently met guyX, we immediately hit it off and after a few weeks started dating. It's been a couple of months now and things are good, not great. Recently I began to notice a chain of lies from when he's sleeping, where he's been to who he hung out with :squint: . I am not a over protective person, the statements above I've noticed just from random conversations with him. Im not sure what to do, I dont want to confont him explictly yet. Should I wait and give him some chances?

    And lastly, how would does someone differentiate between these two guys?
    1) A guy that truely loves you
    2) A sweet talker who just wants pussy
     
  2. The Secretary

    The Secretary My domestic skills will rock your socks off!

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    Its very hard. Depending on how good they are at their game you cant tell until you are in over your head. If you start noticing lies now get out, it will only get worse. Did you talk about being exclusive? If you didnt that probably given him or her free reign to do whatever where ever. I dont date unless its exclusive I am very protective over the men I date I dont share. If hes "sneeking" around now about something harmless just give it time it will turn to other things.

    Where do you meet the men? Bars are not the best place. Not that i would depend on this but ask your friends to see who is available. Most good relationships start that way. But that doesnt mean the scumbags still cant be around.
     
  3. johan

    johan Active Member

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    It's hard because you're letting your feelings override your head.
    Why don't you ask him about those little "lies"? See what he says.

    The counter argument will probably be that he resents you checking up on him, you don't own him, he doesn't have to report back to you. All true.

    But if you want someone who maintains a higher level of transparency, and a lesser need for a separate, private life, well, realize that's something YOU need.

    Keep in mind there is a line between wanting openness and transparency....and being controlling and intrusive. Which side of the line do you fall on?

    But it all starts with having that 'innocent' little conversation with him.
    Try it and let us know.
     

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