SRS Long Distance issues

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Original, Feb 4, 2005.

  1. Original

    Original OT Supporter

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    Long Distance stuff

    Well I fell in love with this girl who is in Wisconsin and I'm in Ohio.. we're both 15 so I can't exactly meet her yet. We've really liked each other for about 6 months and about two months ago we both fell in love. There are no problems with her being faithful to me or vice versa. We are both very much in love and we wouldn't give that up for anything. There were several complications last month but we pulled through and our love has been better than ever, she is the love of my life, and I am hers!

    Well, I've started to get a little worried about her. She said she was in depression about 6 months before I knew her and things hadn't gone well until she finally met me. From the time I met her until about a month ago she was one of the happiest people I knew, along with myself. I do my best to brighten up every single day and make the long distance a little more tolerable. We often call each other (free long distance :hsugh: ) and we talk online ALL the time. Every once in a while the distance and lonesome gets to me, but I shrug it off and get hope.

    It almost seems the entire month of January up until now, she has seemed different. Not like she has changed, but almost like she is sad for one reason or another and it's hard to get me to cheer her up. I do my best and when we talk about our love for each other it's great, but then it seems like something is always bothering her (not her affection, but her mood). She often tells me she's going to bed early because she feels sick all the time, gets headaches, stomach aches, cramps. I know it can be menstrual, but she has been doing this almost every other night for a long time! She's not lying to me and skipping out early on purpose, I'm just worried for her sake. I never want her to be sad or upset or lonely and I think she knows I'm always cheering her up and then she'll grow sad again.

    Can distance and lonliness do this? I know how hard it is to fall asleep everynight thinking about that someone that you just can't feel or even see, it makes you sad.

    Are their any ways to make this easier? I can tell something bothers her when she doesn't want me to leave, but doesn't have anything to say. She wants something of mine to feel, she wants me to be real, what can I do!

    Should I just be the sweetest guy I always am and just stick with it, hoping she'll turn around? I want to make her the happiest person ever!

    Thanks for any further input!

    BTW - Don't worry, she's returning her part of the bargain too. I talked about me wanting to please her so much, but she does the same for me so there is no lack in the relationship. I just sense so much lonesome, even when I'm there.

    Also, she is a real sweetheart. The first girl I've met who I could actually be my charming self to and wouldn't be walked all over! I love her with all my heart! I wish just once, she wouldn't feel alone. It might be over a year until I meet her :wtc:

    [Sorry for the long read.. I typed more than I thought :rolleyes:]
     
    Last edited: Feb 12, 2005
  2. Budha

    Budha Guest

    Ok dude, dont ever, ever let yourself get attached to an online girl... Its not real man unless you are actually physically seeing her. I have tons of online friends that I talk to all the time on a personal level, but they are just that, friends. When I was your age I had a few girls that I "liked" online and stuff like that, but it wont work out, you will probably never get to meet up so dont get your hopes up.
     
  3. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Going along with that, out of sight is out of heart, plus you can never see who's she might be dating behind your back. It sucks when your in love, but having been in a on-line long distance relationship myself i can tel you how much you have to run away from it. Im not saying that they ALL fail, but im saying they are vastly more likely to fail because you can never check what is happening for real. Plus it's very hard to visit, it's vital that you can visit and that you can check the person that you are in love with frequently. Otherwhise it's not worth it.
     
  4. Original

    Original OT Supporter

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    Yeah.. i'm not having doubts, but there are many things that worry me, as would worry anyone in a long distance relationship. I finally find the perfect girl and she lives 300 miles away, that really sucks :rolleyes:.

    But yeah, she's made me happier than ever the past 4 months and everything is going really great now, so I'll just stick with it for now. She tells me everything, maybe even a little bit too much sometimes. Seeing as how we spend over 2-3 hours on the phone every other night, I wouldn't see the point in her doing that if she was seeing another guy, plus I trust her :mamoru:

    I'm giving this one a chance. All I know is, if she ever lies about a relationship behind my back or decides she wants a break, it's over, even though I know it's hard for girls to not really 'date' while we're together. I'm not, so she shouldn't either.

    I made a decision today I'd just sit back and let things happen, I won't stop anything, I'll let things go as they are. One of her friends just died, i've been around to cheer her up. We both see each other as the love of our lives, the only problem is that I might turn into a loving friend rather than her guy. That would blow, but anyway, cheers, no new knews, everything is fine. Cheers.
     
  5. tigerlily

    tigerlily Spoiled brat.

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    I couldnt help but stop reading after I found out you have never even met this girl. Not to say you dont really like each other, but especially since you are young, I doubt you have fallen in love.

    Why not just be friends with this girl, since you cant see her and a long distance online/phone relationship might be tough? You may have strong feelings for her, but dont rush into anything :hs: You have the rest of your life to find someone that is right for you, so dont settle for anything less than the best....which means a girl that lives states away isnt the best you can do!!

    That doesnt mean she can be your best friend if you two want that, because it does sound like yall get along well :) Whatever you choose to do, best of luck to you!
     
  6. civicmon

    civicmon got all my game from the streets of california.

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    dude you're 15.. there are PLENTY of fish in the sea.... trust me on this.
     
  7. Original

    Original OT Supporter

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    You are all probably right, but I'll just stick with this for the time being. There's really no doubt whether I love her or not. I know what I feel, I'm very mature for my age and different, and I'm not in this for just a girl to hang out with and fuck senseless. One reason I never had many girlfriends, I always looked for that perfect one. Now that I'm pretty sure I found her she lives this far away.

    I'll just live life as it comes to me, I guess I shouldn't be putting any stress on myself over this relationship. I'd rather love her than lose her. If it works out, then it will, but if it doesn't, there will be someone else. I have lots of faith in this relationship, but I know the chances of this working out are slim. Thanks for your input guys, I'll keep that in mind next time I need faith :hs:

    Ciao
     
  8. hey, i've been there before and done almost exactly the same thing. i was 16, thought i'm more mature than i deserved credit for, and found a way to talk to people who listened online.
    i'm 19 now, and i feel even more immature and less knowledgable about everything i know than i did when i was 15.
    experience things you can in your back yard. be real with people and meet hot chicks in coffee shops. they are the ones who are cool to date. at least, that's coming from a caffine addict's point of view.
    you do sound mature for your age, i'm not saying you don't (cuz you sound like i did :grin: ), but at least there are a few of us thinking and praying for your situation. i hope that's some encouragement at least.
     
  9. LipGloss

    LipGloss Guest

    woah, wait a sec, so at first you're saying you love this girl, you think she's the one and now you're like... "well if it doesn't work out there's always someone else" and "the chances of this working are very slim" yeah... you REALLY love this girl :rolls eyes:
     
  10. Budha

    Budha Guest

    How is that putting him down?? We were all 15 once and we know what this kids talking about. There are tons of fish in the sea, and an online relationship is in the most times a joke if you dont actually see her. Its like Kip from Napolean Dynamite... I mean yes, these are real people your talkign to on the other end of the screen, but still, they are behind a screen. You can lie about anything online, like make yourself a completely different person. I have a girl taht I talk to on the phone all the time that lives clear across the country. We would date if we would be close, but she's not, and thats that. I have other girls around here that I can be physical with. Your just gonna get attached and get hurt, thats all online "relationships" do.
     
  11. Original

    Original OT Supporter

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    I can usually tell when someone lies. We don't lie to each other. Why would she spend hours and hours on the phone with me if she was living a big lie. Neither of us are desparate but this just fell into place and it's felt great ever since. I'd appreciate anyone's further support on this, but if you're gonna tell me to end the relationship, just don't speak any further, I won't. It's not everyday I fall in love and she's the best thing that's ever happened to me! :x:

    Thanks for stickin up for me CasualJesus. Didn't you find a girl online too?

    Welcome to the forums LipGloss :o
     
  12. DockEllis

    DockEllis Active Member

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    you're 22 now
     
  13. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    showcasing your ability to do basic math was worth a 7 year thread bump?
     

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