Discussion in 'Fitness & Nutrition' started by Mr. Badass, Nov 10, 2007.
my wife has 2 problems. one is the fact that everytime she gets drunk she gets mean. she always looks for a fight, or a way to make me feel like shit. the other problem is that every morning after she gets drunk she has an explosive watery shit. one night she pushed me to far.
she was drunk of course and felling a little frisky so we we messing around and i tried to put it in the butt, she got mad and started talking shit about how i'm no good and my dick is small, and that she probally wouldn't even feel it. so we never did have sex.
after she went to sleep i couldn't get the pain of her saying my dick was small out of my head. i wanted to embarrass her as much as she embarrased me. so i got an idea
i went to my sons room and got his bag of marbles. i then went to my secret stash and got a bottle of lube. i could just image her reactions when you shit marbles the next morning. i lubed them up one at a time and slowly pushed each one in. about a hundered in all. i got so excited i jerked off then giggled myself to sleep.
the next morning i woke up so excited i couldn't stand it. i made allot of noise getting dressed so she would wake up. she did and not 3 minutes later she said " oh my stomach. not again" and ran to the bathroom. i was in there brushing my teeth. usually she would tell me to leave but the urge was to intense. she sat down and let it rip.
she dam near had a heart attack from the noise. the marbles hitting the porcelin sounded like a machine gun going off in the bathroon. she turned white as a sheet and stood up. still shtiting all over the place. marbles rolling all over the floor as they bounced around. it took her a couple of minutes to put it all together. she said " what the fuck" i just laughed and laughed as she packed her shit and left.
i really do kind of miss her though.
i like the first reply
jesus fucking christ what the hell mate
I looked at some of his posts.. what an annoying little kid. Ban.
oh yea and no what else... i have never worked calves in my life
lol im advanced?.... ive been lifting for half a year
dude im just tryin to have a little bit of fun. and i have only posted calf pics once before, but i was showing ham in that pic tho. but still had calf
you are NOT aware.
My 7 year old daughter has more definition in her calf and she just started working them!!
you are all NOT AWARE
i agree.. you all dont understand that its an inside joke. so you probably wont get it
lol, every fat persons calf = that pic
i just watched some show about a 1000 pound man, i bet his calf is even bigger than 17.9 inches lol.
cept im not fat.
AND you're only 15
REALLY? I HADN'T HEARD
looks like a fat persons calf, not well defined, nothing to be proud of. but if you're only 15 it isn't too big of a deal, but why post pics of it on a forum lol. that's would be like me putting pics of my abs (or lack of) on here
yea the pics look terrible but in real life they look good. doesnt matter. oh and y did i post it.. its kind of an inside joke between the teen section. first one guy said it was impossible to have 15"+ arms at 15 years old. and i said o'rly and posted my pics. and no1 beileved me.. then i posted a pic w/ the measuring tape.. ppl were like idgas.. then ever since then i would post in threads and say (jokingly) oh yea thtas cool but not as cool as meh 16" BiCePtZ!!. and every1 thinks im serious and says y do u always brag about that. lol so i just joke around to piss them off. cuz they think im serious when im obviously joking. and i got tired of saying omg look at meh 16" roided out BicPTZ. and decided to make a new fad about calves. hence the aww not this shit again replies.
edit- yea long story
holy fuck dude you are stupid
"...an ironic twist of fate, nonetheless. In an effort to defend himself against the verbal assaults from the masses he quietly offered his testimony. His fingertips, shaky and sweaty, squeaked out these paltry set of words. 'They'll understand,' he thought while typing, and let out a nervous laugh that only he could hear. Little did he know that the fury of the OTFN horde would only grow, his words more kindling to the already stoked fire. Because you see, a 15 year old has no place on an internet forum. And any effort to earn such a place is met with swift and unrelenting punishment. Everyone knew this except he, and now as the mob advanced with more fervor than before he knew he had sealed his own destiny..."
shouldnt a requirement of an inside joke be that it's funny?
yes. its funny to the ones that know i am joking. (thatarmykid and tatortotajigalo)
maybe others but those are the two i know of
i dislike you