SRS Life is kind of bad lately need advice/ to vent(anonymous thread)

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Darketernal, Dec 17, 2008.

  1. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Im a college student. I live in a small town that really has no potential as far as meeting girls or getting a job. I want a job so bad but our economy is dead. I'm in college right now full time and the only reason I have't packed up my shit and left is because my school is dirt cheap and I really don't have anywhere to go. Im also dating a girl who is crazy. I use to love her so much and slowly my feelings are fading away but like I said in this small town and its hard to meet people I'm also afraid of being single partially because i'm a sex addict. My friends and I really don't do anything at all except drugs and I'm trying to quit but its been so hard. There is seriously nothing to do in this town except drink and do drugs. I'm just so scared lately that I'm going to be locked into this life style for ever and be with this girl for life. What do I do? I love my friends here but its just depressing me because of the sober boredom and lack of oppertunity. :sadwavey:
     
  2. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

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    Are you talking about sexual addiction in the serious compulsive variety, or young buck needs to get laid variety?

    It sounds like the drugs and alcohol may be sapping your motivation, and perhaps causing a circular process, with one leading to the next.

    If you wanted to, could you stop drinking (and stay that way permanently and could you stop using drugs, and also stay that way? Answer me honestly, otherwise I can't give you the correct information.
     
  3. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    As far as sex goes I have it every day and I love it. I guess I'm just afraid of loosing that. My motivation is kind of caused by my depression. If you asked me if I could stop using drugs for the rest of my life that answer would probably be no. When I'm high its the only time i'm truly happy / at peace with myself
     
  4. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

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    Could you stop having sex, just like having drugs? Or do you feel compelled and overwhelmed by the need to do it? When you say affraid of losing it, can you tell me why you might lose it -- or what you'd be losing exactly? Are you having sex with the same person, or do you have multiple partners?

    My bedroom used to be a revolving door for women -- even while sick, I stilled found a way to drown my sorrow, but it sure wasn't in a bottle. I ask this question to see if I can better understand what you are seeking to accomplish and what you're needs are in order to arrive there. I'm not here to force, push or even suggest you take a direction, unless you would like me to.

    I would say they feed each other, at least in my experience. Drugs can lead to depression, depression can lead to loss of motivation, loss of motivation can lead to depression and drug use. Ultimately what started this chain is usually none of three mentioned, but some other variable in the persons life, such as some pain, or circumstance, or something, but that's not always the case.

    Are you dependent on sex or your drug(s) of choice and powerless to stop one, both, or neither?
     
  5. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    yes I cant stop either the drugs or the sex. the most ive gone without drugs is three days. Im really lost and feel like i'd rather die
     
  6. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

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    I think it would be a good idea read up on addiction. These patterns seem to converge on some systemic stuff you're facing. Deep things happening inside that you're trying to find away to cope with. I think these outlets (drugs and sex) are probably a few of many outlets that are suppressing the feelings, fears and perhaps a past that is haunting you.

    Whatever is below the surface that is driving these addictions probably needs to be handled through the advice of a professional on addiction. Addiction centers and counselor centers are available locally.

    It's hard facing these things, but the first step (read up on the 12 steps) is admitting that you have this pattern of behavior you can't control. That's a step in the right direction.

    I wish I had better advice and could comfort you, but you aren't alone. There is a forum here on OT that is called Road to Recovery, the members there will have much more specific advice and information to offer you than the Asylum will, but you'll probably get some useful data here too.
     

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