Slept til 2 today. Woke up and blasted Burritos by Sublime and some faggot down the hall tried to match my shit with Avril Lavigne on his shitty PC speakers. Seriously? I didn't do jack shit last night. I'm in college and couldn't even find a party on my birthday. We showed up at some sketch party but the cops rolled in right in front of us. Been living a pretty shitty life cycle. Don't eat too well, the cafeteria food here is shit. Don't really give a shit about any body, I'm very friendly and sociable but deep down I have social anxiety problems. Ultimately, I feel very little compassion and association for and with most of society. I rely on interpersonal relationships with people. I can't seem to meet a girl for some reason which is really causing me to doubt myself. Like I said, I don't really party (don't at all). The finest girls I see are in the library. I swear that's the best place to meet them, but the library isn't exactly the best place. I don't put out a lot of effort anyway, for the majority of the ones I meet are fucking dumb drunks anyway. Hooked up with a girl last semester, and she started liking me for a period I guess, but just in the week or two that we were close, I learned quickly that I did not want to pursue the relationship furthur. I don't do a whole lot. Started to get a gym routine down, but I can't seem to get into it by myself, and my buddies don't have any motivation to go. It's like that video: all I do is smoke weed. Really. It's my ADHD medicine/anti-anxiety/painkiller all in one. And unlike seemingly everybody else, my school performance is almost excellent. At least this far. Kicked ass last semester, and though this semester I'm still emotionally and psychologically fuct, I'm doing alright for the time being. That's the thing, I gotta keep my academic performance up. Gonna start spending more time in the library. Again, my buddies don't do shit. Neither do I. Don't know how to conclude except that everyday is a dragstrip. Getting old really, I wish I knew what it would take to get myself interested in learning at least. I could spend so much time rotting away in the library as opposed to a dorm room. Fuck it. Thanks for listening. Cliffs: Suck it.