SRS Just need to vent...

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by LaurenAshley, Jun 15, 2009.

  1. LaurenAshley

    LaurenAshley We are all made of stars

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    I am working 2 jobs: I am a cashier at a restaurant making shitty money with shitty hours, and a personal assistant for a rich dude for $15 an hour (only 15 hours a week) which still isn't that great of money..

    My dad wants me to come up with $ 5000 by the end of the summer for school which means that I am currently not making anywhere close to what I need to be making, and the economy sucks.

    Too make things more fantastic, I recently got a boyfriend.. he just graduated, and his parents give him everything he needs.. he spends all the money he earns on stuff he wants. He graduated a month ago and he hasn't been searching for a job because his dad basically can hook him up with a job as soon as he moves back home in 2 weeks.

    SO... my boyfriend basically sits around and either plays video games, or sells stuff on Ebay all day, and he eats out for every meal. In addition to this, he usually sleeps in anywhere from 12- 4 pm every day.

    I'm really starting to get nauseated by his lifestyle especially because I have to work my ass off in order to get by.

    There are a lot of really good things about him: he and I spend a lot of time with each other and we never get bored of each other. We both love the same kind of music, and we both place a really high value on intellectualism.

    I really enjoy having deep conversations every once in a while, but I also have to have comedy in my life... and I think that is one thing he is seriously lacking.. For example, we went to see "The Hangover" and afterwards all he could comment about was the fact that it "encourages drinking and driving" and how movies like these ultimately lead to the destruction of values in our society. He laughed maybe 1 or 2 times throughout the movie.... That is only one example...I am pretty easily amused and I rarely find myself laughing at any jokes he may attempt to make. It makes me really sad.

    The thing I do really like about him is his passion for adventure.. he goes camping and is very openminded about trying new sometimes-risky things.. He and I plan to go sky diving soon and camping in the desert. Also, he loves to travel, and this is something that is really important to me..

    I'm only 20 years old and I am definitely not looking to get married or anything any time soon so this isn't like something that is seriously important, but... I guess I'm just frustrated about a lot of possibly really small things.. I don't know if I just set my standards wayy to high or if I have legitimate concerns. Maybe you guys could help me out..
     
  2. WalrusFTW

    WalrusFTW New Member

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    There's your problem. For all it matters, the guy could be a genius, but if he isn't any fun to be around, then what's the point?
     
  3. chica&buddies

    chica&buddies Active Member

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    :dunno: there you go, you just said it yourself. you're not looking to get married soon, so why not enjoy dating this guy for what he is. he doesn't sound like the "perfect" guy for you, but you two do have common interests, so why not enjoy each other's company?

    i understand how you're feeling. if a guy has too many pet peeves [which, imo, your guy does], i'd be completely turned off. i don't like dating a guy if i don't see the relationship ever going anywhere. there's nothing wrong with a casual relationship, if you both agree on it.

    i guess you just have to decide if he's worth keeping around or if you'd rather be single and find a guy you're more interested in.
     
  4. LaurenAshley

    LaurenAshley We are all made of stars

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    yeah.. i mean like I said, he and I enjoy each other's company for the most part.. and he does a lot for me, but I dunno I guess I have just preferred being able to really laugh at the things my past bf's have said.
     
  5. LaurenAshley

    LaurenAshley We are all made of stars

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    yeah I guess that is what I am questioning right now... In 2 weeks he is moving home with his parents which will be 1 hour and 15 minutes away from me... I am just trying to figure out if it's worth keeping this commitment..
     
  6. Daria

    Daria New Member

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    First thing, if you're struggling to figure out if it's worth the commitment, it's probably not.

    Second thing, he sounds like just someone to have fun with and the relationship doesn't sound that serious, so why go out of your way to work hard for the relationship when you have so much already on your plate? You really don't want to overstress yourself when you are already working and stressed about making money for school.

    I understand the overwhelming stress of working to pay your own way through school. Use your dad's command as a guideline and set your own, realistic goal. Try your very best and do what you have to do to meet your goal. You don't want to burn yourself out.

    As for the boyfriend having an easy life, yes it is annoying. I can see it being very aggravating that someone close to you has it so easy and you have it hard. It's normal to feel angry about these things and get very irritated. Normally, when I'm in a situation where someone around me is very lazy to the point that I am getting very upset, I usually stop being around this person. Surrounding myself with other people who work just as hard as I do makes things ALOT easier, in many different ways.
     
  7. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    you sound so jealous of his life style :rofl:


    stop being so jealous hes already done with school
     
  8. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    You're still really young. You should in no way be thinking your current relationship and boyfriend is the kind you want to spend the rest of your life with; it should be completely casual and fun with no serious undertones.

    It's obvious he takes life as it comes since it's pretty much all given to him. While you may like many parts of his personality you two are too fundamentally different to ever last. You'll start to resent him more as time goes on. You have always seemed a little more mature than most 20 year old girls but you still need to have fun when you can and not take relationships so seriously at your age.
     
  9. Kafka

    Kafka New Member

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    :rofl::ugh: this girl over here.

    it sounds like she has a great dude, despite his personality flaw. My girlfriend's parents are both doctors so suffices to say she also doesn't have to work, but she definitely isn't as lazy as the bf in this thread. Nevertheless, you should work on it. You haven't even mentioned whether you've communicated this matter to him. You should at least give him that courtesy. Women, hmmph![​IMG]

    Contrary to what a lot of OP think, men can ameliorate their flaws if you just give them sufficient notice and explanation.
     
  10. Mars Princess

    Mars Princess They hatin'

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    About the job and the stress: I've been there. There are people who don't have to work from the bottom up and ya, it can be a real thorn in your side, especially when you see that person wasting their time and/or their money/their parent's money, but that should make you proud (not jealous) that you have what it takes to support yourself. Just keep plugging away at it. You're still in school and you are 20 years old. It's called paying your dues ;)

    Have you tried asking your boss for more hours or asked if there is something else that you can take on?

    In regards to your dad asking for money for school, is he looking to be paid back for the last few semesters or what? Maybe you can work something out with him. As silly as it sounds, ask if you can get on a payment plan with him and pay it in smaller amounts so that it is manageable. If you are not living with your parents, this is easier to do. Heh

    In regards to the boyfriend, it sounds like you enjoy your time with him more than you don't, so if it is not a serious thing, don't sweat what's going on with him. if he's moving away, I personally wouldn't be putting a lot of effort into the relationship but that's just me
     

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