LGBT Just met up with the ex.... :noes:

Discussion in 'Lifestyle' started by RyRy, Sep 3, 2005.

  1. RyRy

    RyRy Active Member

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    :noes: It went rather well and I got all of my stuff back! :wiggle: Except the shirts, he said he kept those so he would always have a little piece of me close to him. Now I just have to make sure that neither of my parents open the trunk of my car once I put this box back in it. :eek3: He wrote me a note :eek3: (Im going thru the box as I type this) Wow. :eek4: I'll post it later I think Im going to go take a nap and have a good cry. If he would have said 1/2 of this shit a couple of months ago.... :wtc:
     
  2. RyRy

    RyRy Active Member

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    Ok well this is what he wrote me...

    Ryan,

    I don't really know where to start or what to say so bear with me. I know you probably won't believe me when you read this but I never did anything with (17 yr old). Like I tried to explain I didn't feel the same feelings for him as I do for you. I had feelings of only lust for him, no feelings of love at all. Infact I don't even really know why they are still here, except he doesn't have anywhere else to go to. I really do miss you, talking to you, seeing you, hearing your voice on my messages everyday, the cute little text messages I would get saying things like "icu", "hey there babe just leaving for class. What would you like for supper?" "Can we meetup somewhere I just want to hear your voice", "Bitch I just cleaned house WTF happened it looks like Martha Stewarts evil lesbian clone just came and worked her ill magic?" , and my favorite of all,"Can I come over / go crusing with you, even though we haven't been apart that long I really miss you alot"I wish along time ago you would have moved back in with me, even though most of the time you were only here when I was out gone on the truck (he used to drive a semi) or when I was away at the academy to take care of the dogs. I realize that I am closed off alot, but like I always told you I don't show my emotions at all, and when I do I usually fuck things up.

    I'm so sorry that I fucked your life up. When you told me that you wished you never would have met me, I agree but only so you wouldn't wind up losing so much. I wish things that happened in July never would have happened. I also wish that you wouldn't have moved back here just for me three times. I realize the first time 5 years ago wasn't wholey because of me, but the last two times in the last two years were. At least then I knew you would still call, or would come see me every few weeks. Now however I've gone and fucked things up royally, and for good I'm sure. Your family hates me, they've threatened my job, started lies about me, all of which you know about. I also understand that you've tried to tell them the truth but they won't listen, all that matters is the people who know the truth, know the truth. There are so many things I wish I would have said, or should have said or could have said. And I know you told me several times over the last few years that if given the choice you would choose me over your family if they ever found out about you, me or us. While the thought of that blows my mind, and I find it very romantic and loving, please choose your family over me. Your dad is sick, your mom (besides being crazy) isn't that bad of a person, and you have so much more going for you then an overweight, high school educated cop. You have the whole world out there waiting to just open it's doors for you, and I hope you make the right choices.

    I hope this is everything of yours in this box I haven't opened it in over a year until the last few months. I hope you don't mind I kept the shirts, the bottle of cologne, and the two pictures and put them in my bedroom. This way everynight I can still see you, and talk to you, and have a little piece of you close to my heart still. If you want any of those things back just text me and I will have them to you asap. I know it sounds like I am trying to win you back in this letter, and I'm sure I've made you cry, made you angry, etc. but please go on, leave me here, and just remember that I'm the one who fucked everything up. I cheated, I lied, while you were always there with those cute loving, puppy dog eyes and the sweetest heart, with hard working hands, and the type of person who would give someone the shirt off their back if the other person needed it. And not to mention that cock hehehe ;) Even my dogs miss you! You wouldn't believe how many times (dog) has seen you drive by, and run to the door barking, wagging her tail, come to get me and bring me to the door. She even has started whining at your picture that's in my bedroom. When you called me yesterday I had you on speakerphone and I'm sure as you heard she was going nuts trying to find you! I need to go you said to meet up with you at 1 and its nearly 1 now so goodbye for now. Know that you were the only person that I have had this type of feeling for, these types of emotions for, and the only person that I have ever loved. Nobody else has been able to get as close to me as you, even to the point of finishing my sentences. I hope in time we will be able to keep in contact, on the phone, via e-mails, etc. I know you need your space, so take as much time as you need. I really do miss you, your voice, your eyes, your funny voicemails, and text messages. I also really miss going shopping with you. I always felt so "normal" when we would go do the little things like grocery shopping, and christmas shopping for our families together. So inclosing let me leave you with this, and edited version of the song we used to sing...

    You've run into a little tough luck baby
    Don’t you sweat it
    Everything is waiting outside in the world for you
    You know it
    Go and get it

    Who’s your daddy, who’s your baby?
    Who’s your buddy, who’s your friend?


    Love,

    B.


    Original version of the song: Toby Keith - Who's Your Daddy
    Here you come knockin’ on my door baby
    Tell me what you got on your mind
    I guess those college boys all went home for the summertime
    And you’re lookin’ right, lookin’ good, lookin’ like a woman should
    So why is it so hard to find
    A place to lay your pretty little head down once in a while
    You run on a little tough luck baby
    Don’t you sweat it
    Everything is waiting inside for you
    You know I got it
    Come and get it

    Who’s your daddy, who’s your baby?
    Who’s your buddy, who’s your friend?


    And who’s the one guy that you come runnin’ to
    When your lovelife starts tumblin’?
    I got the money if you got the honey
    Let’s cut a deal let’s make a plan

    Who’s your daddy, who’s your baby?
    Who’s your buddy, who’s your man?

    You might’ve run on a little tough luck baby
    Don’t you sweat it
    Everything is waiting inside for you
    You know I got it
    So come and get it

    Who’s your daddy, who’s your baby?
    Who’s your buddy, who’s your man?
     
  3. MapleLeaf

    MapleLeaf New Member

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    RyRy - did you post this to share, or did you post this to get some perspectives from others who have been through a similar situation?
     
  4. RyRy

    RyRy Active Member

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    Both I suppose. I was also suppose to call him back Monday night or tonight but I haven't yet. I'm too scared if he asks me back I will come back. :noes: I hate being alone that much. Granted we would still be 300 miles / 6 hours apart but atleast I wouldn't be single. Because lord knows my gaydar has been shot down by one of the Stealth bombers that fly over daily! I even dated a chick a couple of times while you were gone... yeah that went over like cooking pancakes on a iceberg. :rofl:
     
  5. MapleLeaf

    MapleLeaf New Member

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    RyRy once I am over my jetlag (hopefully soon) I will jump in here and make some comments. But damn, I couldn't sleep properly - up at 4 a.m. today - that just sucks.
     
  6. RyRy

    RyRy Active Member

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    I don't know what's up with me I haven't been able to sleep more then 2-4 hours a night all week, however last weekend when I was home in my bed all I did was sleep. I think I got 8-10 hours of sleep for 3 nights in a row! And like I said this week I haven't been able to sleep at all except last night! I took a Benadryl because my allergies were going insane, I took it at like 11pm... and I just woke up its now 11am! I had class at 8am! :o oooops! Thank god that all my teachers this semester use a website called BlackBoard and they post their notes, assignments, etc. on it because Tuesday I overslept, yesterday I went to visit my Grandma in the hospital and today I was in a drug endosed coma for 12 hours, however as soon as the groggyness wears off I bet I'm going to feel good! So I will want to go do something hopefully. I need to clean house, this place looks like the dump it is. I wonder if Merry Maids will do college apartments?! :mamoru:
     
  7. pokeitatme

    pokeitatme New Member

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    Merry Maids!!!! Oh how delicious sounding . . . do u get 2 order male or female?!?!
     

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