SRS .... Just got into a wreck, fiancée very upset

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by cascade85, Apr 18, 2009.

  1. cascade85

    cascade85 New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2006
    Messages:
    78
    Likes Received:
    0
    It didn't even involve another car I hit a curb that in my opinion shouldn't have been there in the first place. From the begining, leaving a baseball game and was on my way to the store to get my fiancée some soup (toothache and feeling extremely hungry and shity) the street that I'm on goes from one way to being a two way street without a sign just an arrow on the left lane floor telling you to turn (didn't see it, it was dark and raining) before I crossed the intersection I hit this small triangle shaped median (sometimes you see them when you make right turns usually there's a post or something in the middle). Ok big deal I hit a curb I can just back up and go along... The problem with that is the big dip in the center that half my car went into. So after jumping the curb and taking an 8in or so plunge I begin to leak oil, a lot of oil. What's worse is I know my fiancée is going to be really upset with me. I not even thinking about the car I just don't want to make that phone call and make him feel worse than he already does. When I finally call he asks if I'm ok but he is not happy at all. He doesn't like me going to the city and I should listen more after this incident. Couldn't even bring him soup so I feel like a very shity gf, I feel like he's so good to me and I'm the one that keeps screwing up. And no I wasn't drinking. I hope I explained the curb thing ok.
     
  2. 7960

    7960 New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2004
    Messages:
    60,415
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    New England
    they're called "accidents" for a reason. sounds like he needs to lighten up a little, and get off your case. you made a mistake, big deal, ask him to step off. and if he doesn't, then the next time he makes a mistake you should go for the jugular and then stop and say "how does it feel? because that's how you made me feel."

    then have make-up sex.
     
  3. ForevererZero89

    ForevererZero89 New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 17, 2009
    Messages:
    316
    Likes Received:
    0
    he will be pissed, but has no right to be pissed at you. you hit a curb big fucking deal happens all the time.

    p.s. your car or his?
     
  4. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 22, 2007
    Messages:
    11,400
    Likes Received:
    0
    So you got into an accident, which could have happened anywhere, and your partner is angry with you? The insurance company will pick up the cost if your boyfriend isn't a bum and pays for insurance.

    Or, you can pay out of pocket so his insurance rate doesn't change, and the problem is solved without incident.

    I get the impression this goes far beyond a simple car accident. Is this boyfriend controlling and a douche-bag to you, criticizing you for little mistakes you make?
     
  5. JBunni

    JBunni New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2009
    Messages:
    1,040
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    east of here
    does he get upset with you frequently? If not, it might just be because he was feeling bad, and as was mentioned, accidents happen. At least you were trying to do something nice for him and bring him soup, sounds like a good gf to me.
     
  6. THoC

    THoC New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 5, 2007
    Messages:
    7,341
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    TRampa, FL
    my gf got into a car accident a little while back. she called me freaking out. i drove to her, held her, told her it was ok shit happens.

    who the hell would get mad unless you:

    a) do this often

    b) was acting like an idiot
     
  7. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 22, 2007
    Messages:
    11,400
    Likes Received:
    0
    Or C: The boyfriend is controlling and dominates the girlfriend to the point that she's been convinced that she's a retard who always does everything wrong -- and she knows so, because he tells her so.

    So, C could be an option, just .....maybe.
     
  8. THoC

    THoC New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 5, 2007
    Messages:
    7,341
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    TRampa, FL
    very possible. based on her post he sounds like an angel. so ill just take her word for it.
     
  9. Midgetized

    Midgetized Don't mess with Douche Cat

    Joined:
    May 29, 2000
    Messages:
    49,189
    Likes Received:
    6
    Location:
    San Diego, CA
    :werd: that's what it sounds like to me

    she probably has low self-esteem and he has her convinced that she is lucky to be with him and he can do no wrong

    manipulation FTL
     
  10. Daria

    Daria New Member

    Joined:
    May 15, 2006
    Messages:
    5,529
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Ottawa, Canada
    successful marriage strategy #1 :rofl:

    In seriousness, your boyfriend sounds very possessive and judgemental. He doesn't like you going in the city? :hsugh:

    Do you feel restricted in your relationship? If so, you should not feel that way. You should feel free to do what you want and come and go as you please.

    Whose car were you driving? Will you be handling the repairs or will he?
     
  11. djshotglass

    djshotglass New Member

    Joined:
    May 4, 2007
    Messages:
    3,795
    Likes Received:
    0
    So what if this is something she does often and he doesn't want her driving because she gets in so many accidents? What if they can't afford insurance because she gets into so many accidents?

    Just playing devil's advocate here.
     
  12. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 22, 2007
    Messages:
    11,400
    Likes Received:
    0
    I doubt the OP is an incompetent moron/retard who has a chronic problem with getting into car accidents and requires monitoring and punishment for her disobedience.

    I mean, think about it, it sounds pretty stupid, doesn't it? It's something a "parent" might do with a teenager, but a woman and her partner?
     
  13. djshotglass

    djshotglass New Member

    Joined:
    May 4, 2007
    Messages:
    3,795
    Likes Received:
    0
    I know a few women who shouldn't and don't drive :hs:. Yes I'm sure there are men too. Some people just weren't meant for it.
     
  14. Daria

    Daria New Member

    Joined:
    May 15, 2006
    Messages:
    5,529
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Ottawa, Canada
    She sounds like she's scared and tiptoeing around her partner. Not good.
     
  15. Sgt. Friday

    Sgt. Friday Guest

    Ouch. I know what you deal with. I used to be the same way as your BF, maybe not as bad but I was a tad bit controlling and would get upset at stupid crap like that...well maybe not the accident but I would overexhagerate small nothing into something else. I hated myself for it, more so how I made her feel about it.

    how I corrected it, I just stopped one day and said "you know what I'm sorry that was an asshole thing to do/say" I honestly felt like shit and I now before I lose my cool over anything or say something I will regret I will stop, take a breath and look at the situation from her point of view before moving forward. yuou know what? 9 times out of 10 its not a big deal and we move on.

    If again, this happened to us i'd be more concerned with how she was than the car, those can be replaced.
     
  16. no lol today

    no lol today Soy la bailarina de la muerta. OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Mar 16, 2008
    Messages:
    23,507
    Likes Received:
    17
    Location:
    SoCal
    Has anyone nicknamed him "asshole" yet?
     
  17. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 22, 2007
    Messages:
    11,400
    Likes Received:
    0
    She hit a curb, you know? How many of us have done that and scuffed a rim, or done some undercarriage damage to the oil pan or exhaust? Really, how many of us have damaged the front spoiler fascia when pulling into a parking spot too far? It's really common.

    In the end the car accident really is the problem. It is my view that the very last sentence is what is causing suffering for this girl. No one should feel like their partner is so good to them and that all they do is make mistakes. That really isn't good, it goes beyond the accident and bleeds into other parts of this person's life -- do you all understand what I'm saying?
     

Share This Page