Jealousy and insecurity

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Toda Party, Oct 16, 2006.

  1. Toda Party

    Toda Party .....

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    Heres a quick little story that teaches a good lesson.

    A few weeks ago, I was at a bar I frequent on Friday nights. I'll mention that I'm into country dancing. Anyway, there was a very good looking girl who kept making eye cotact with me and smiling. A couples dance starts and I see her standing and watching, so I aproach, ask her if she knows the dance(she doesn't), I take her hands, and we start dancing. We get about a 1/4 of the way around the dance floor and a guy(her bf) grabs her, pulls her away, and says "I don't want you dancing with anyone". I see him take her away from the dance floor, probably to bitch at her. Didn't see her for the rest of the night.

    One week later

    I get to the bar and notice she's there, and don't see the bf in sight. She walks by me a few times but I was talking to a few people. A few minutes later I see her standing around, so I aproch and bust on her about what happened the previous week. She starts laughing and says that was her EX. Long story short, I got her phone number.

    Lesson learned? Jealousy and insecurity will kill attraction and your relationship.
     
  2. RyeLou

    RyeLou OT Supporter

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    I learned that a harder way but it most definitely served the same purpose. Years ago I ruined an otherwise good relationship with jealousy and insecurity. I've since changed quite a bit through growing up and time as well as learning from my mistakes. Not to toot my own horn, but I'm pretty proud of myself in that respect. I used to be such a mess with all that it was rediculous.

    Kudos on your situation though.
     
  3. Toda Party

    Toda Party .....

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    Hey everyone makes mistakes, and you learned from yours :bigthumb: Some people never seem to learn or figure it out.

    The funny thing about what happened in the situation I posted about is that after the guy did that I was thinking "this guy is history :mamoru: "
     
  4. RyeLou

    RyeLou OT Supporter

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    haha, yeah I learned my lesson. It's funny because I'm friends with that girl from way back when. We recently went to a Tigers game together and I told her I was sorry for how I was. She laughed and told me it was fine. We've both changed quite a bit since and are happy.

    I would feel a little weird about a guy doing what you did to my girlfriend, but if she was eyeing you it seems as though things were on the rocks anyhow. Either way even if someone isn't cool with it he seemed to handle it in the absolute worst way possible.
     
  5. bandwagon

    bandwagon Copy/Paste

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    QFMFT.

    My LTR sometimes shit tests me about stuff like this.
    "Ohhh he's soo hot!"
    "Oh just a sec, I'll go get his number for ya *walks off*"
    "NOO! *she grabs me and pulls me back* I'm not looking right now. ;)"
     
  6. Bruticus

    Bruticus half dead OT Supporter

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    Well played, two can play that game ;)

    I've never been the jealous type but if I'm with someone who is it can definately kill things. I wouldn't mind a SO country dancing with someone else (apart from the fact it's country music :rofl:), though grinding on someone might be a different story.
     
  7. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    But would you really want a gf who wants to dance with other guys, anyway?
     
  8. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    Brilliant. I'm trying that. Regardless of the outcome, I'll post it here.
     
  9. Toda Party

    Toda Party .....

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    It isn't like you're all over each other as you would be in a club. I dance with girls that have boyfriends there all the time because they're not willing to get out there and do it. This is the only time that theres ever been a problem. The guy was jealous, insecure, and a douchebag... and apparently he got canned because of it.
     
  10. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    awesome. he immediately called her bluff. this is a must.

    Like my boss, who is a natural alpha male. He said something about Friday the 13th and I said "Why? Are you scared?" Without missing a beat he was like "Ooooo I'm so scared! I'm terrified!" and he made it into a huge hilarious joke. Instead of explaining why he wasn't afraid or of course he's not afraid, he took the ball and ran with it.

    I always try to do that when someone challenges me. Take it and run with it, make it into a joke. Agree with them. Go with it. Do anything but get your feelings hurt and get defensive.
     
  11. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    thats not the point. The point is you should be secure enough in who you are to watch her dance with someone else and know that she will come back to you.

    Because if her interest level in you is high, all you have to do is get near her and you will pull her from the other guy.

    I also think he should have been dancing with her, if he won't dance its because he is insecure and afraid he will look stupid. Who cares if you look stupid when you are dancing with a hot chick?
     

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