SRS I've realized something sad about myself. v. Goodbye OT

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Ivandrago, Apr 30, 2006.

  1. Ivandrago

    Ivandrago I must break you.

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    I've honestly haven't measured up to much in the last 16 years. I've been slacking off in everything from high school to undergrad to EVEN graduate school, which i didn't finish anywhere nearly my full potential. I've taken everythign that my mom has given me, tennis lessons, swimming lessons, music lessons, etc. etc. etc., all the love and money that she put into me, and haven't given back even 1% percent of it. Everything that she's put into me, even when she couldn't afford it, or she had to work more to do it, all that, i've not lived up to even a small amount of what she expected from me. By 26, so many of my peers are successful in life, professional life, social life, and i'm unsuccessful in any of those categories. I just had a conversation with her, and she told me that she has pretty much given up on me and doesnt' expect much anymore. The worst part about it, she's almost blaming herself for this, wondering if she's done something wrong. She hasn't. She did more for me than any mother has done for her son (at least among my friends that I know of). And i've repaid her with nothign but rude behavior, a lackluster attitude towards life, and not pushing myself in anything. I could've done so much more by 26, and instead i've only done so much less.

    In closing, I feel that it's time for me to take a break from this forum. If anyone wants to drop me a pm or an email once in a while, i'll definitely check that and answer, but I doubt I'll be posting much for a while, except maybe to check this thread to see if anyone has some advice for me, because i'm at a loss somewhat as to how to turn this around. I need to concentrate on my life somewhat and figure out how to get somewhere, how to prove to myself that I can do it, to my family, and more so to my mom, who I know if suffering and isn't doing well becuase of what I'm doing, or rather what i'm NOT doing.

    Peace out guys. I'll be back later, when I get my life in order.
     
  2. michaele36

    michaele36 New Member

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    atleast you did all that schooling and shit, i probably wont do that. Your 26, you still have more time.
     
  3. GRocks10

    GRocks10 New Member

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    The question here is.. WHY? Why haven't you pushed yourself.. why is it now after all this time that you realize you aren't doing so great? WHY NOW? Is it the talk you had with mom? The way she said she feels that shes given up on you, or the way that she feels that maybe shes the one that made a mistake somewhere..? Which is it gonna be and what do you plan to do different now to make yourself more of a 'success'?
     
  4. DjMystery28

    DjMystery28 New Member

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    your only 26, you still have at least who knows how many more years left. But understand this Tomorrow isnt always there, So live for today. My best advice for you is to set some goals in your life, written goals. Work at them and try to make them happen.
     
  5. You got a degree and finished grad school. That's more than most people ever do.
     
  6. Create

    Create :free at last:

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    Written goals. Let your mom help you hold *yourself* accountable in their completion.
     
  7. not your average

    not your average      ¯¯¯¯ ¯¯¯¯¯ ¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ OT Supporter

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    I'm in your position except for a few small details. I'm 22/yo, i've been at 3 different colleges, the first being my longest @ 2 years and I stayed on campus. I never really got the feeling that things were clicking, like I didn't find my niche as easily as everyone else, and i'm still in the process of searching. Life has obstacles, everyone encounters them; how you handle them is what builds persona. You need to sit down with your mom, face to face, tell her you love her (give her a hug if needed) and make her understand that what she has done for you is {insert your own words here}. I'm currently left with a bunch of credits ranging from comp science, to criminal justice/sociology, all the way to the business/marketing end. I feel like i've learned more in my experiences in the last few years than any diploma could ever prove. The shitty part about life is that there is no way to measure that. At 26, i'd say you're a little too worried. You're still young, have fun/be happy and other things will tend to unfold easier. It all starts with yourself. I wish you the best of luck in this journey called life. :)
     
  8. ebbnflo

    ebbnflo REAL- LAOT Hermit

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    I agree that is a good place to start actively turning things around.

    If nothing else, I'd bet your mom would appreciate hearing that from you, and it may help ease some of the burden she carries with blaming herself for everything. (I'm a mom, and I totally understand the whole " what did I do wrong?/what did I do to fail my child?" etc. syndrome)

    Best wishes to you, I think you are heading in a very positive direction.
     

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