Is this immature of me?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by DC9, Apr 29, 2010.

  1. DC9

    DC9 New Member

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    I've been with this girl for about 4 months and I'm in love with her, she is in love with me. I've dated plenty of girls in the past, but I knew from the first time I met this girl that she was the one and she thinks the same about me. I'm a junior in college and she is a senior. Things are going great now. The only thing that bothers me is she used to be a big partier, had lots of BF's and hooked up with many guys. She's completely changed now, and said she's been with enough guys and is done with that lifestyle and wants to settle down and be with me. She's not like she was before and I love her, but I'm constantly reminded of her past when I see facebook pictures, hear stories of guys she slept with, etc. It really bothers me when I hear and see these stories and she said it shouldn't bother me. Am I being immature by letting these things get to me? I know it's the past, nothing can be done about it, but it still bothers me to think of my girl fucking someone else.
     
  2. Aronomy

    Aronomy Get your COME ON!

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    Yep, usually people who feel this way change their mind as they get older. So I would say it's immature, but it's still valid, and you have to decide if it's a deal breaker for you at this point in your life. I will wager that you will change your mind as time goes on though.
     
  3. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    :werd:
     
  4. Aronomy

    Aronomy Get your COME ON!

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    Better quote Babs ;)
     
  5. DC9

    DC9 New Member

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    Yeah. I mean in the beginning of the relationship it bothered me to the point where I thought about breaking up with her because it made me sick, but I feel a lot better now, but it still does bother a little, but it will get better with time like you all said
     
  6. infinite.purple

    infinite.purple New Member

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    definitely not immature. talk to her about how that stuff makes you feel and hopefully she'll be more sensitive to it. you don't need constant reminders of a past that's not part of her life anymore.
     
  7. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    Also are we talking stuff from like years ago or stuff from like 2 months before you started dating?
     
  8. DC9

    DC9 New Member

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    Stuff is usually 6-12 months old.

    She knows I don't like seeing/hearing that stuff so she doesn't intentionally bring it up. But like if we are out with her friends, one of them might mention something I don't want to hear, or if I'm in my girlfriend's room, I might come across an old picture she had under her bed with all her junk. So it comes out of nowhere.

    Also though she can't stand it if I bring up what I've done in the past. Even stuff that isn't bad she can't stand. Like she won't even look at facebook pictures from before we started dating because she doesn't want to see me with other girls. If we are walking and I pass a girl that says hi, she will ask who is she and how do I know her. So just like I don't like it when she mentions things, I don't mention my things either, but sometimes it just comes up.
     
  9. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    That does sound a little immature and insecure on both your parts. I mean old pictures? That's nothing, really. But you guys are both young and still early in the relationship. The longer you stay together, the less all this shit will affect you.

    I can totally understand feeling gross when people talk about dudes she's banged though. I had some old friend of my ex come up and start talking about shit like that once and I was like :ugh:. Fucking rude and inappropriate imo.
     
  10. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    My ex got a mix cd with pics of her and her ex printed on the top from him after we'd been dating for months. Now that's something worth worrying about. :rofl:
     
  11. just_another_on

    just_another_on New Member

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    Oh boy you're fucked :rofl:
     
  12. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    Or if your gf intentionally saves a sext from an ex. That's another one my ex did.

    How the fuck was I with her for so long? What an idiot I can be sometimes. :rofl:
     
  13. DC9

    DC9 New Member

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    how am i fucked?
     
  14. just_another_on

    just_another_on New Member

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    She's the typical 'do as I say not as I do' young minded bat shit insane female.


    You said she gets mad when ANYTHING of your past comes up. Whether it be pictures, conversations, etc. Shit you said she wont even look at your FB photo's cause of photos with you + girls in them.

    But yet, she thinks you shouldnt pay any mind to the convo's and stories and pictures and what ever else YOU come across.


    Yeah, real 'mature' of her.
     
  15. more off

    more off Moderator

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    :rofl::rofl::rofl: quit snooping through her shit
     
  16. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    The part you didn't mention is your background...
     
  17. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    what a clusterfuck. you are both immature and insecure to the point where its going to make you both miserable.
     
  18. DTR rex

    DTR rex New Member

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    :rofl::rofl:
     
  19. DTR rex

    DTR rex New Member

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    Sounds like you both have issues.

    It seems like you both really connect with one another so I propose two options here:

    1) Neither of you talk about it at all. Make an agreement to get rid of shit from each others past (in regard to hook ups and significant others). She doesn't bring up her past and you don't bring up yours.
    It's bullshit that you have to know all this stuff about what dicks have been in her, but you can't bring up anything from your past.
    Best decision is neither of you bring anything up.

    2) Or, on the other spectrum, you both sit down and let it all out so that way there are no surprises. This option might cause more problems though because it sounds like you're both insecure.

    Personally, if I was dating a girl who I knew less than a year ago was having one night stands all the time and fucked a bunch of dudes I probably wouldn't continue the relationship.
    For me though, it has nothing to do with insecurities. I take sex more personally than most dudes... And I'm not a fan of one night stands. So if I was with a girl who fucked half the football team I'd make a break for it out or respect for myself and her lack of respect for herself.
    I'll probably get flamed for this, but I don't give a flying fuck.
     
  20. LonnieJ

    LonnieJ New Member

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    College is probably the only time in which a girl can "get away" with experimenting and being promiscuous. Don't begrudge her for her life experiences, especially if you want to stay with her long term.

    It's much better for her to have gotten it all out before you, then to get the itch and do it while she's with you.
     
  21. john law

    john law Guest

    once a whore, always a whore.
     
  22. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    :rolleyes: Whatever... its not like we are talking about cheating on people. and I don't see where you get off talking like that either.

    Whats wrong with girls having some fun?

    ugh.. its soo annoying how much you puritanical weirdos are afraid of women having sex.
     
  23. john law

    john law Guest

    Self respect and STD's come to mind.

    From what it sounds like, this girl gets around. You can have her.

    Ever hear the saying, "you can't make a ho a housewife"? It applies here.

    This is the kind of girl you smash and dash on, or nail and bail, hit it and quit it, bone and disown, wham bam thank you ma'am. Not the kind of girl that you make into your girlfriend and then "love" her after a few months.

    Edit: I read his first post more, she is "the one"?!? She is "changed". and they are in love after 4 months? This dude is about to learn some HARD lessons. I expect a break up thread in a couple months. take it to the bank.
     
  24. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    You get all of your dating advice from rap songs?
     
  25. john law

    john law Guest

    Who doesn't?

    Rappers live the dream. They get women that wouldn't look at your sorry ass, drive cars your broke ass wouldn't even able to sit in, and live in houses you only will be able to see on TV.

    Rappers>>>You.
     

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