Is this an appropriate way to ask?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Maffy29, Oct 16, 2006.

  1. Maffy29

    Maffy29 Active Member

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    Is it appropriate to just ask a girl for her number straight up? I was at the Enterprise Rental desk this morning exchanging my rental car (mine is in the shop) and the girl in front of me was picking a car up. I'd never seen this girl before (I live in a college town) and I thought about just saying something like "I know this isn't the time to talk, but I'd like to talk to you sometime, can I get your number?" Do guys still do that these days?
     
  2. frpSpore

    frpSpore New Member

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    can't hurt
     
  3. otherlank

    otherlank OT Supporter

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    really, youll probably never see her again if you dont ask for it. what can it hurt?
     
  4. FredBull

    FredBull *******

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    true but out of all pick-up lines it's still the last one i'd try, personally. ^^
     
  5. Maffy29

    Maffy29 Active Member

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    Absolutely.

    It wasn't an appropriate time to go into the whole chit chat routine. She was on her way out I was next in line. It isn't going to be my primary way to meet girls, but I guess I wanted to see if anybody here had any success doing that.
     
  6. bandwagon

    bandwagon Copy/Paste

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    "Hey, I want to see what you're all about. Write down your number for me."
    *hand pen and paper*
     
  7. Toda Party

    Toda Party .....

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    Yeah. Lose the "I know this isn't the time to talk" part... it comes across as wussy-ish IMO. So does "Can I get your phone number?"
     
  8. RedVsBlue

    RedVsBlue Penguins > *

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    "hey can I get your number, we should hang out sometime..."

    or the like. Keep it simple and dont read into it to much. She really isnt sitting there analyzing your statement nearly as much as you will, so dont worry.

    Its always better to speak up then to hold your tongue and lose the oppertunity.
     
  9. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    And for the inner game part of all this...

    You are giving her a valuable opportunity to spend time with you. This is a privelege that not every girl receives, and she would be a fool not to take advantage of it.

    If she declines, so be it. She wasn't smart enough to take advantage of the opportunity, or she isn't available.

    Either way you shouldn't feel bad if she says no, or in the most likely rejection scenario, gives her digits and either gives a fake number or you can never actually get her on the phone. Her loss not yours because there are many more females out there just waiting for such an opportunity.

    100% agree with the posters above. (although personally I don't like "We should hang out sometime" because its vague. I don't give any specifics when getting the number but different things work for different people, you have to find out what works best for you.)

    Your frame of mind is key. Your non-verbal communication (voice tone, eye contact, body language, general mood) is what she will read the most strongly, and that comes from your frame of mind.
     
  10. Toda Party

    Toda Party .....

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    Like Yail Bloor said, it's no big deal if you get rejected. Getting rejected is better then not taking a shot at all. As he also mentioned, whats going on in your head is important. When you know that getting rejected is no big deal and you can just move on to the next girl you'd like to talk to, it really is communicated in ways that were mentioned. It will make a huge difference in the way you interact with women and people in general. You can learn all of these ideas and get them planted inside your head, but you will really start to "get it" once you go out and get experience. Knowing that you have OPTIONS changes everything.
     
  11. fray

    fray New Member

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    Just don't come across like a player asking for a number...unless you are, in which case you probably don't care if you get rejected. But if you're asking her because you don't ask everyone, and you really think she seems nice (or cute in this case, I guess, since you don't really know her) and you are afraid this is your only chance to get to know her... let her know that. I'd let her know why you're asking for her number...so that she doesn't think you do it to every girl you run across.
     

  12. you give her a compliment, see how she reacts.. if a blush or a smilre breaks her face, you on your way to the glory.:bowdown:
     
  13. Toda Party

    Toda Party .....

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    Giving compliments right away like that is cheesy... unless maybe it's on her shoes, shirt, something like that. Something unexpected. Do you think that doing what the last 30 guys did is gonna get you anywhere.

    I'm a guy, and even I don't like getting compliments. They make me go :ugh:
    I can only imagine what it's like to have it happen 50 times a week :ugh:
     
  14. Ibanez Guy

    Ibanez Guy New Member

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    my buddy was at a shoe store and after he checked out and was driving home, he said to himself, why don't I just ask that cashier out. so he turned around, went back in, and said, "this may seem strange, but want to hang out sometime?" that was 3 years ago and they are engaged now...

    moral of story, it never hurts to ask
     
  15. fray

    fray New Member

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    I would think it was cheesier (or possibly gay) if I was complimented on my shoes rather than if it was something more personal.
     
  16. moonie

    moonie u want a FRANKYUM?

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    :bowdown:

    i wish stuff like that happen to me :hsd: :hsd:
     
  17. Toda Party

    Toda Party .....

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    Do you get complimented on your looks all the time? If not, just imagine an attractive women who gets it probably on a daily basis. It'll get old fast. Take notice to detail(like is she has nice shoes) and you'll stand out. There is an endless supply of guys commenting on her looks. You say the shoes thing sounds gay to you- well guess what- women love guys who have style and know how to dress, and pay attention to detail.

    Edit: I don't know if you're a guy or a girl, but if you're a girl, dont take offense to what I'm about to say. You probably don't get complimented on your looks much if a guy who you've never met tells you that you look good actually sparks interest in you.
     
  18. fray

    fray New Member

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    I care less about style and more about personality. I prefer a sincere comment from a less stylish guy over a random pick-up compliment that seems like it gets used on every slightly attractive female he comes into contact with. I'm not saying I'm going to date him or that I'm all excited about it, but I appreciate that it was said and i'm not automatically in evade-mode. "You have a really nice smile" is much prefered to "Damn baby, you're looking so good in that shirt" (Or, "Oh wow! Are those this season's Jimmy Choo's??" - gay).

    In my experience, style doesn't usually mean much. Do I want a guy that showers and has good hygiene? Yes. Do I care if he isn't up on all the trends and wearing whatever the popular brand of shoes is? No. Maybe my definition of stylish is different than yours.

    I always disagree with the pick-up views on here. I guess I'm not the type of girl everyone is trying to pick-up. It makes me crazy when I read some of these threads. I think the advice would backfire on me.
     
  19. Spinkick

    Spinkick Active Member

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    So you think a girl is going to respond to a compliment on her shoes over something about how she has a nice smile? It sounds awful metro/gay to me. What guy compliments a girl on her shoes?
     
  20. Spinkick

    Spinkick Active Member

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    ps: commence the jigglin!
     
  21. Toda Party

    Toda Party .....

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    It's an example of paying attention to DETAIL, rather than the blatantley obvious. As far as style, I do agree with you silver. I certainly don't wear what all of the metros are wearing, but I do makje sure that what I'm wearing, I wear good. You can have the most expensive clothes but if you wear them all wrong you'll look like an idiot.

    "You have a really nice smile" is much prefered to "Damn baby, you're looking so good in that shirt"

    They key there is NOT to tell her she looks good. You can say "Hey, that's a nice shirt". The best option? Don't give ANY compliments right away!
     
  22. Spinkick

    Spinkick Active Member

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    The last time i got a compliment on what i was wearing, was from a gay guy. I know it probably doesnt go the same way for girls, but I'm just saying. The best way to get to know a girl is to have a conversation, You dont have to start out with a compliment at all. Treat her like your buddy and move from there.
     
  23. fray

    fray New Member

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    I'm not trying to be bitchy here, but I really want to know, because I read all these posts and I just don't understand... you guys (I'm generalizing here, not to you specifically, but the guys giving pick-up advice) all seem to endorse approaching it like a game. You should say this, you should hold off attention/gifts/whatever until time X, you should lead her like she desires to be led by a man (my personal favorite)... but what happens when you get tired of acting to maintain the relationship and just want to be yourself and relax?
     
  24. Toda Party

    Toda Party .....

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    While growing up, people get the ideas in their head that buying things and complimenting a woman you just met is how you should deal with them. Guys think this is how you get women to like you and want to be with you. A lot of times the guy tries to be this super nice guy who he thinks the women SHOULD be attracted to. They generally act like wussies because they want to keep the woman happy and fear her getting upset. Would they act like this with everyone else in their life? I hope not. Why take a woman out(who you don't even know if you like yet!) and pay for her dinner, kiss her ass, ect?

    If you take notice in the guys you know who are good with women, they are never the wussy type. And the guys who are wussies and have a girlfriend or whatever, they woman usually walks all over them and loses attraction. Many people have ideas of the way things SHOULD be, but don't think about the way things really are. Also, many people will SAY they want a certain type of person, yet end up being with the complete opposite.

    Personally, I've always been the sarcastic, ball-busting type who has fun doing it- so it's not an act. I do what I want to do, and don't care if you do or you don't like it :) But I also know how to treat people good. No one ever says you should treat a woman badly.
     
  25. fray

    fray New Member

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    I don't feel like a distinction is ever made though. The guy could've known the girl for 2 days or 2 years and the advice is always the same. Similar for the guys who are acting how they would normally act, and that happens to be nice, but who have to act "dominating" to get the girl. I don't see how that's much different, but that's the advice they're given.

    The guys who are good with women (i.e., good at netting a lot of women, not good at being in a long-term, caring relationship with a woman) are not the wussy type, but neither are they (typically) someone whom I would want to be in a relationship with. The guys who are good with women (i.e. treat women well, so women want to be with them) aren't domineering leaders. They're typically polite, respectful, view their partners as equals , and don't play the game. (In my world, anyway.) And I don't advocate anyone getting walked all over in any relationship, but I don't think being dominant and leading is the way to go, and I don't that line of thought really goes along with the idea of "treating a woman well". It seems derogatory and condescending. Maybe that's just because I'm older and independent.

    If my boyfriend ever posts and asks if he should take me out/buy me something/etc., please do not tell him that to do so will only show me how weak he is and that I (along with all other women) am a cheating whore who will inevitably leave him for someone who can play the father-figure better. :hahano:
     

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