Is this abnormal?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by vizyn, Apr 23, 2009.

  1. vizyn

    vizyn New Member

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    So for the past 3 months or so I've been single and dating for the first time in almost 6 years. I've gone out with a bunch of girls and had some fun.. but recently met a girl that I really hit it off with. We had a ton of fun and have since hung out quite a few times. I took her to dinner one night and when I took out my wallet to pay she asked to see my I.D., I asked to see hers as well and she refused... she started practicing spelling my last name (long, italian, not pronounced phonetically). I asked what hers was and she wouldn't tell me.. whatever, I didn't think much of it at the time.

    This past weekend she ended up spending the night sunday night. I left for work in the morning and let her sleep in and said she could leave whenever she wakes up. At work I realize I really have no idea who she is still at this point, and she's alone in my apartment, so I start freaking that she's gonna loot my shit and disappear. I get home at the end of the day and everything is normal except she cleaned my bedroom AND bathroom, that shit was spotless :bigthumb:

    The next time we hang out I ask her for her last name again, she won't give it, I ask why, she says she doesn't have a reason.. I don't push the issue. I'm just curious as to why she'd keep from telling me - does this seem abnormal to anyone? I don't have a ton of experience dating until recently really so I don't really have a good idea of what normal really is I guess.
     
  2. just_another_on

    just_another_on New Member

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    Hmmmmmmm, she just might be playing some stupid game to just string you along/keep you interested.
     
  3. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Yeah, she either is hiding something or just wants 0 kind of real relationship with you besides sex.
     
  4. Dahlia

    Dahlia Active Member

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    That reminds me of a post in the main, some guy was a pizza delivery driver that was delivering to a house in a gated community. When entering, he was asked to give his name, he threw a HUGE fit and refused to give his name. He said it was just because they didn't need to know.

    I think it's kinda weird. It's not like there's much you can do with a last name, besides google it and such. I bet she has something to hide like beer said.
     
  5. vizyn

    vizyn New Member

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    We've talked about what our expectations are from each other. She's also only been single for a few months after having been in relationships for the majority of the past 5 years. Neither of us want a relationship, keeping it casual, and she actually won't have sex with me.. told me she has trouble separating emotional attachment from sex.

    Even though she actually brought up that conversation, and stated her position first, I seem to get some mixed signals. She tells me all the time how much more she likes me than the other guys she's dated recently.. and I've never been complimented so many times by someone - sometimes its a little too much. She also told me she wants to date me 'for a while'. That sound like she's looking for exclusivity without a label?
     
  6. just_another_on

    just_another_on New Member

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    in4famous/richparents
     
  7. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Yep, you're a rebound and nothing more.
     
  8. teep

    teep New Member

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    i remember that. fucking ridiculous :ugh2:

    then again main is full of guys who absolutely refuse to go anywhere without a gun. to church, to take a shit, to work, to go for a walk...
     
  9. vizyn

    vizyn New Member

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    She works two jobs, one as a server and one where she sets up charity events at clubs/bars in the city (NYC). One parent died to cancer, the other has cancer, and there isn't much of a relationship there.
     
  10. vizyn

    vizyn New Member

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    Makes sense.
     
  11. THoC

    THoC New Member

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    maybe she doesnt like her last name. maybe she is just fucking with you as a joke. maybe she just doesnt trust you enough to give it to you.

    i do think its weird if you guys hang out that much that she would not tell you.
     
  12. Reign

    Reign Banned

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    Dunno man... could be any number of things listed here. Could be nothing. It might be she just doesn't want to rush things and is keeping it slow. No way to tell but if you're not getting what you want out of this, don't be afraid to cut her loose.

    Especially if you've been "officially" dating for longer than... I'll say 2 months, and she hasn't put out. Normally I'd say less than that... but, yeah. Recent relationship.
     
  13. D7

    D7 OT Supporter

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    How did you meet her?
     
  14. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    Like they've said there could be a million reasons why, the most obvious have all been named. To answer your question- yes, it is very fucking abnormal. Who the fuck does that? First time I've ever heard of it.
     
  15. Vysion

    Vysion New Member

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    She wont tell you her last name because she doesn't want you to find her on myspace or facebook. She probably is still in a relationship, either married or boyfriend, that she wants out of and is waiting to see how the relationship develops with you first. Her facebook or myspace probably has this information and she doesn't want you finding out.
     
  16. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    Oh damn, that actually sounds spot on. That's the first reason that anyone has said that makes solid sense to me.
     
  17. Reign

    Reign Banned

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    Hell you could find out for sure and say "Look, you don't seem as into this as I do. I really like you but I am seeing other people and maybe wanted to take it up a notch by being exclusive to you, but like I said, you don't seem that interested. So if you're not then I'm not being fair to myself so... bye"
     
  18. Reign

    Reign Banned

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    A good way to find out for sure is to ask her for her link so you can add her.

    That's not abnormal is it? I seemed to get asked it all the time but I don't have any of those because they're :greddy: as fuck.
     
  19. vizyn

    vizyn New Member

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    Karaoke on a rainy ass Tuesday night.
     
  20. D7

    D7 OT Supporter

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    Mmm yeah just weird then
     
  21. vizyn

    vizyn New Member

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    This makes sense.. and here's my theory...

    There is no way she has someone around the city that she's with.. she's been way too open about inviting me out with her friends and been in constant contact with me, and we've hung out quite often. However... I think she might have a long-distance type thing going on and here's why..

    The last date we went on she mentioned her friends were kind of pissed for her bailing on them to come out with me (which I wouldn't have wanted her to do), but she said she only did it because she had a friend coming in to town who she used to date and he's staying with her, and she wouldn't be able to go out with me until he left..... hrm

    Since he's been in town she's been much more distant however the last time we hung out before this she was over-emphasizing how much she liked me, wanted to see me again, that sort of thing... kind of a "let me take care of this and get at me when he's gone" sort of thing... I think the last name thing definitely relates back to not wanting me to find her on facebook.

    When it comes to sex.. she makes comments like "I can't wait to fuck your brains out" and "my roommate didn't let me shave my legs tonight because she wanted to keep me from fucking you" etc... In the cab with two of her friends last week she asked, purposely quite loud, "It's ok if I come back to your place and not have sex with you?" She knew the answer to that because she had asked me before, but I felt like she was trying to make sure her friends heard it for some reason. Possibly making it clear she was cheating but not fucking? I guess its arrogant to believe she's hiding ME from a bf, and not hiding a fuck-buddy from me, but why would she not have sex with me if the latter were true?
     
  22. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    Yeah. LDR bf sounds exactly right.
     
  23. Vysion

    Vysion New Member

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    :rofl: Yeah, sounds like she's hiding another guy from you, or hiding you from another guy...

    I have one question though... if she has stayed at your place several times, why haven't you tried to have sex with her?
     
  24. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    Sounds like you're "the other man", vizyn. If that turns out to be the case, I would

    Run. Run and don't look back.
     
  25. vizyn

    vizyn New Member

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    The first time she stayed over she was drunk, and I wasn't... wasn't about to get into that mess.

    The next she asked me straight up before coming over if I was cool with her staying and not having sex.. I guess part of me hoped she wouldn't be able to resist. Same thing for the last.
     

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