Is this a dealbreaker?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Maffy29, Jul 3, 2007.

  1. Maffy29

    Maffy29 Active Member

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    So I've gone out a few times with this girl. We've had a great time every time. The most recent date, we got to talking about college. I was telling her how I have $0 in student loans. She mentioned how, after she finishes her masters program, will have over $100k in loans. Her bachelors degree is in Sociology and she's going for her masters in something similar. She said decided go to for her masters after job searches got her nothing. I'm 27 years old and have starting to look at relationship a little more seriously. Would this be a potential deal breaker?
     
  2. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    it's just money? :dunno:

    while i kind of understand that you have probably gone through a lot of trouble to be debt free and have no interest in taking hers on, its not like you are talking about wild fiscal irresponsibility here...

    I mean if a girl managed to buy shoes and purses to the tune of 100k, that would be a bit different.
     
  3. Maffy29

    Maffy29 Active Member

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    I was raised by parents who are EXTREMELY fiscally responsible. I understand that she's using the money for someting responsible, but I see as she is getting her masters because she couldn't find a job. What if she can't find a job after this degree? Spend more money to get her PhD?
     
  4. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Are you paying for her loans? I think not. So what's the fucking problem?

    She's going for her Master's in something she is passionate in. Enough so that money and loans aren't going to stop her. I think that's more important than the fact that she'll be paying off debt forever.
     
  5. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    No. Education debt is ok.

    I-can't-control-my-spending-and-I-just-had-to-buy-50-pairs-of-shoes debt is not ok.
     
  6. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    Certain degrees almost require you to have a masters degree to get a job. Psychology is one. Sociology might also be one.

    Find out what her plan is. If you ask her and she's like "I dunno, I might get a job or something" that's one thing. If she's like "Yeah, I'm getting my masters because it's required to work atXyz Corporation and I already have a contact with them and etc." that's another thing.
     
  7. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    btw don't marry her until her debt is paid off. Otherwise it becomes your debt.
     
  8. lauren

    lauren Active Member

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    100k for fucking sociology? yeh, being dumb as dirt is a dealbreaker.
     
  9. verdiocchi

    verdiocchi Oh snap!

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    That's what I was thinking. It's possible that she got out of college, looked for a job and realized that she couldn't have the job/career she wanted without her masters so she went back to school.

    I'd say just talk to her about it. Ask her if having that much debt scares her or how she made the decision to go back to school. See if she has a plan. Remember, she decided to take out those loans so I'd say gage your feelings on how sure she is of her decisions and her future. If she seems like she's got a good head on her shoulders and has other aspects of her life in order, I wouldn't let it be a deal breaker.
     
  10. calisteph6

    calisteph6 Active Member

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    Just get to know her more. I know some people that only have large school debt because they worked part time and used all their money for booze and blow and took out as many loans as they could for extravagent living + school. 100k sounds like a fucking lot just for a masters. Shit I went to an expensive private school and most kids I know could get their masters for less than that. If you marry get a pre-nup for sure.
     
  11. FloppyCock

    FloppyCock New Member

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    Is going out with her a few times going to transfer the debt to you? Will having sex with her magically make her debt your debt? Think more with your dick and less with your vagina.

    If you actually do get serious, which doesn't happen most times, then you can worry about it.
     
  12. Maffy29

    Maffy29 Active Member

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    She went to an out of state college instead of taking a partial scholarship to a closer, in state school.
     
  13. verdiocchi

    verdiocchi Oh snap!

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    BTW, if down the road you want to marry this chick and she still has the debt, put it in the prenup that it doesn't fall to you if something happens.
     
  14. Mr. Bungle

    Mr. Bungle *lube'n up the shock paddles*

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    Honestly she is right, you can't do anything making any money being a sociologist unless you have your masters. So it is a smart move on her part.

    I would think it would be a plus that she is an educated woman and that she knows what she has to do with her life. Getting your masters isn't a fucking cake walk.
     
  15. lauren

    lauren Active Member

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    for a degree that doesn't really matter.

    i would have gone instate for undergrad, and out of state when it mattered (ms). money is obviously tight, and she choose unwisely. neg marks, in my book.


    plus, nobody i know pays for gradschool. they all get fellowships or grants if they are worth anything.
     
    Last edited: Jul 3, 2007
  16. FloppyCock

    FloppyCock New Member

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    Or maybe, she's ambitious and confident that she'll be able to pay off her debt. You're really quick to judge given so little information.
     
  17. lauren

    lauren Active Member

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    most people drag out education loans, and for good reason, they are like 2-3%. very unlikely she'll be paying it off anytime soon.

    it's 100fuckingthousand for sociology.
     
  18. FloppyCock

    FloppyCock New Member

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    No, it is $100,000 for an undergrad and a graduate degree.
     
  19. lauren

    lauren Active Member

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    which is still practically worthless.

    if grad school was the plan from the start, she shoulda been more economical with her bachelor's, and used the money where it counts, if money is so tight she has to barrow that much.

    sounds like she was 'well, what's next' and just decided to stay in school because she had no other plans.
     
  20. FloppyCock

    FloppyCock New Member

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    You sure know a whole lot of what is best for other people considering you can't spell the word borrow.

    Maybe, just maybe, not all 18 year olds know exactly what they want from life, and have to re-evaluate at 22 when they graduate. I'll go one further: if your life plan at 22 is exactly the same as it was at 18, you suck at life.
     
  21. lauren

    lauren Active Member

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    zing!

    i don't get how having direction and ambition makes you suck at like. regardless....

    so i guess some applicable questions would be:

    what state is she from?
    what was her undergrad major?
    what schools did she go to?
    what is her after masters plan?
    how old is she?
     
  22. FloppyCock

    FloppyCock New Member

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    If your life plans haven't changed during the years where you're supposed to finish growing up and actually figure out who you are, you've got a problem with either aiming too low or just sucking at life.
     
  23. Kalypso

    Kalypso New Member

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    You are implying that no one knows what they want to do at 18? I know someone who's known what he wanted to do since he was pretty much 10, he's currently making 60k a year doing it. I figured out at 17 I wanted to be a screenplay writer/director, and started seriously pursuing it about 6 months ago. I really don't see myself doing anything else at 22, it's what I have fun doing and if I can make enough money to live on writing I see no motivation to do anything else.

    I suck at life for not being a drugged up unambitious fucktard at 18, that needs to change his life? My bad for knowing what I want and going after it /shrug
    Some people grow up early.

    edit- Debt is the worst thing you can do to yourself. It will single-handidly fuck up 5-10 years of your life, she owes 100k now? Wow, that's easily 5-7, maybe more years to pay off. I can't imagine getting in that much debt.
     
  24. FloppyCock

    FloppyCock New Member

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    You're telling me your exact plan for your life hasn't changed between the ages of 18 and 22? Not the broad details, but specific things, like what education you'll pursue to get there, etc?

    If it hasn't, you suck.

    Some people never grow up.
     
  25. Kalypso

    Kalypso New Member

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    I know specifically what I'll be doing for the next 1.5~ish years, after that it really depends what happens. If I get an agent, I'll probably end up with an unsold screenplay and a job writing somewhere for something while I work on future work, if not I have to pretty much run around pimping myself. All depends on what happens.
     

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