SRS Is the trip worth it?should i go?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by big 1, Jun 9, 2006.

  1. big 1

    big 1 New Member

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    Heres the situation: i have spend 7 weeks planning a trip away with 9 of our friends.I have ben so stressed out planning the details of this trip that ive become so stressed out. My Significant Other (SO) is not there for me as a shoulder to lean on throughout the planning process. whenever i ask my SO for help, i get "do it yourself, i dont care" attitude. so yesterday, i ask him for advice and again i get shut down. i go to my guy friend for help instead. My SO gets mad at me for turning to my friend, so he says hes not coming on the trip anymore.
    Quesiton: should i just go wihtout my SO, since i spent so much time planning the trip?
    was i in the wrong for turning to my friend for help?
     
  2. teo

    teo . => ? => !

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    Eh?
    Go on the trip. If your SO isn't mature enough to a. give you a reasonable response when you ask for help (either "I'm not able to", "I don't want to" or "Sure, I can help") and b. realize that you seeking help from your friends should be a non-issue, then he deserves to sit at home and wonder what he's missing, anyway. If I were you, I'd say 'good riddance' and go on the trip myself. No need for bad attitudes ruining what should be a fun trip.

    You should look at the bigger picture, though. A lack of communication in a relationship is a big problem and should be addressed as soon as possible. If you can't communicate on the same level, you won't be happy over the long term, and you need to look out for #1 (you) as far as your happiness goes.
     
  3. Toasty

    Toasty Naked people have little or no influence on societ

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    Go.

    From the sound of it, your SO needs to grow up.
     
  4. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    Is your SO going on the trip? Why is she getting mad at you when you ask for help, she turns you down so you ask one of the other people for help? That sounds immature at best.
     
  5. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Your SO is a self centered selfish person, if it where for him nothing would ever get organised. Continue to take the trip, afteral ' life is for us to enjoy' the constant negativity of your SO will lead litterary to nowhere , so just keep on organising , take the trip and have a wonderfull time without him.
     
  6. RedDawg

    RedDawg Well-Known Member

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    go on the trip and have fun with your friends, you're SO is being very immature. Where are you going?
     
  7. johan

    johan Active Member

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    Might be worth having a little chat with your SO also. If you just leave without him, he'll likely take that quite poorly and there will be a big mess when you return.

    Take this time to sort things out. Don't just cut him out and take off on your trip without speaking about this.

    Given how immature he is, I doubt he'd handle that situation in a good way.
     
  8. KatWoman

    KatWoman •••••••••••

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    So your SO doesn't want to help out with a simple thing such as planning a trip, and then gets pissed when you ask for someone else's help. Like Teo said, look at the bigger picture. If you end up marrying/committing to this person he may not be helpful for when bigger life issues come along that require both partners' input, such as buying a house or dealing with other major life decisions. Little things now can amount to larger problems later on. I personally can't imagine planning a trip for 3 without the other 2 folks' input let alone 9 people. If he can't help you with a simple task now, consider this a red flag.
     
  9. PlatinumX

    PlatinumX OT Supporter

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    Go on the trip, if he doesn't go, then he bought it on himself. If you do not go, he'll have the upper hand in the relationship, simply because it seems like he is testing you. He wants to see how much control he has over you and your life.
     
  10. PuppyCat

    PuppyCat O.T. Mom

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  11. big 1

    big 1 New Member

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    thanks for the advice everyone:) i ended up going camping, i spoke up to my SO about the issue, and he smartened(sp?) up and apologized. the camping trip was problem- free.:)
     

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