SRS Is she being honest? Does she really mean what she says?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by ady2glude707, Jan 29, 2006.

  1. ady2glude707

    ady2glude707 New Member

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    Is she being honest? Does she really mean what she says? **EDIT 1/30**

    Here is the emails she sent me:

    "Good morning *****, I just wanted to say hello and tell you something i cant really say over the phone. I really like you and care about you alot. I'm glad that i met you your so nice and good to me. When we became a couple i told myself that i hope our relationship lasts. I love to be around you, you make me so happy and you always keep me laughing. Your such a thoughtful person and you have such a good and strong heart. We do click so well and I hate to do this but i need to do it for myself. Dont think im being selfish when i tell you that i need to do this for myself. I think me and you should just be good friends for now and hopefully in the future something more. I thought i'd be ready to be in relationship but im not. It has nothing to do with you its something that i need to do for me and my son. I need time to get myself together and teach my son things, i need to give all my time to him right now and i noticed that i havent been lately. I cant stop thinking about you even when im at home i think about you i dont pay enough attention to my child. My mom and my brother noticed it. What if something accidently happened like i got pregnant. I really woundnt pay attention to my son. I also get hella jealous when you go out.
    I don't want you going out at all and thats not fair for you.
    I don't want to be a jealous person but i can't help my feelings, i feel like a pshyco
    just cause i have a kid and can't really go out i don't want you 2 hahahahaha
    thats not fair. your probably wondering when i started thinking about this. Well i started thinking about this after i was coming back from the doctor to get the morning after pill.
    I started thinking even if i got on birth control some women still get pregnant
    cause theres only a certain percentage that you won't. Or if we used a condom and it came off again or something. I was thinking about all the consiquences.
    ***** i really care about you and like you alot but right now im not ready to be in a relationship, i hope me and you can stay close friends maybe in the future when i'm ready to be in a relationship you'll be single and we could be together. But don't stop your life for me, if you find someone go for it.I hope you can understand and i hope i'm not hurting your feelings. But i'm ending this relationship with an e-mail cause this is something i can't tell you over the phone its too hard for me cause i like you so much.
    I hope me and you can still be close friends and hang out whenever i have the chance.
    I got to go now ***** I'll call you later or something."

    After my response to her, Her 2nd email:

    "Well it's 12:11a.m. and i keep thinking about you *****. I keep reading your email over and over and over........... I miss you already but maybe i shouldn't tell you that. ***** i had no idea that you were hoping for more in the future. When i read that it really touched me. Thats what i think about my future who im gonna marry,when am i gonna get married,how many more kids im gonna have, am i ever gonna have a girl? Thats what i want a baby girl. Aww how cute..... You know i wouldn't mind if your the one i end up with in the future. I think we make a cute couple. ***** thank you for everything that you've done for me. I really appreciate it just ta let ya know. Ha that was funny how i dissed you that night. Never thought i'd end up being your girl! Well cutie i hope we can still hang out cause i do wanna be a close friend to you. Ya your right when we get a chance to hang out we can do whatever cause when im with you i also have fun no matter what we do. ***** maybe one day we can get back together and be more than what we were and what we are now. Im gonna miss everything too. Your right especially the kisses[​IMG]. Im gonna MISS KISSING your soft lips,hugging,spending the night being up forever making out. Ya im really gonna miss that! Well hopefully your not gone long call me whenever you want. If you ever wanna hug or hold me im here. Or if you ever just wanna lay with me and cuddle or whatever just call me. Im pretty sure im gonna wanna do the same If its ok with you. Or if you ever just need somene to talk to i got you on that too. Im gonna let ya go for now but not forever g night."



    **EDIT 1/30: OK so she comes over last night cause she said she misses me. We end up making out and doing our thing. Maybe she just wants me on the side? I dont get it?**
     
    Last edited: Jan 30, 2006
  2. 311-420

    311-420 New Member

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    how should we know? it sounds sincere..
     
  3. ady2glude707

    ady2glude707 New Member

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    ^^^^^
    Thank you for your opinion. It sounds sincere to me too. I just have a hard time believing all of it becayse girls have a secret language to what they say sometimes.
     
  4. 311-420

    311-420 New Member

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    very true, but those emails sounded pretty straightforward to me.
     
    Last edited: Jan 29, 2006
  5. johan

    johan Active Member

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    Sounds like a very very caring, thoughtful and gentle breakup. But it's still a breakup.
     
  6. ebbnflo

    ebbnflo REAL- LAOT Hermit

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    Yes, it does look like she is being sincere, and trying to soften the blow. It also sounds like she's trying NOT to burn the bridge to you, but is very concerned about her child and needs to make him the priority as much as she seems to adore you too.
    I can relate to her feelings about her child, totally. I am sure it was not easy for her.
     
  7. chica&buddies

    chica&buddies Active Member

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    :werd:
     
  8. ady2glude707

    ady2glude707 New Member

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    **EDIT 1/30: OK so she comes over last night cause she said she misses me. We end up making out and doing our thing. Maybe she just wants me on the side? I dont get it?**
     
  9. teo

    teo . => ? => !

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    Eh?
    She doesn't want to commit to you right now - she said as much herself. She's committing to her son first and foremost and she probably doesn't think she has time/energy to work on a relationship with you. However, she's still human and like the rest of us she probably enjoys a good lay. Are you OK with being her friend and sometimes fuckbuddy but not her SO?

    What's your place in the child's life? It sounds like she felt forced to make a choice between you and her son, which means there's a vote of non-confidence somewhere along the line. If she's not ready for a relationship that's one thing, but if you're not interested in the child or she doesn't see you as a fit father that's quite another.
     
  10. McFly

    McFly New Member

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    Wow man, Ironic how a few of the things she said in those e mails ring true to me currently... I think the main thing was that she said she wasn't ready for a relationship. Yes no doubt she has feelings for you judging by those e mails. She does sound confused, and as I have learned recently, that leads to problems. Her having a kid makes things even more complicated. Her child will always be number 1, that is another thing you need to consider.

    Also what are your thoughts about her? Is she worth persuing and waiting around for? Girls with baggage can be pretty complicated... is it really worth your time?
     
  11. johan

    johan Active Member

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    Messing around with someone doesn't always get you boyfriend/girlfriend status. I.e. public acknowledgement.

    Privately messing around...a lot of that goes on. Still doesn't mean you're bf/gf. Just adds another layer onto the relationship.

    I get the feeling you'd like more. And I get the feeling that she might not want "more".

    The fact that you occasionally have sex (if not now, maybe soon) might seem to be confusing the issue, but it isn't.
     
  12. GRocks10

    GRocks10 New Member

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    Bottom line: What I see going on here anyhow..

    She seems quite sincere in the emails and seems like you're someone who she really cares about and doesn't want to break things off.. but I know what the true problem is here. Well, you see - her mother and brother are noticing that her direction most of the time, ya know.. her FOCUS seems to always be on YOU and not her child. Therefore, they give her more crap about it which now in turns is making her realize that she needs to take more responsibilty for her kid.. but this is to say that she mentioned she is also gets jealous that you get to always go out and she doesn't want you to but shes the one with the kid and not you.. dude, is it me or she herself sounds like she needs to GROW UP!? She can still go out too but its the baggage she has and I'm not sure if she feels that you're up to par to take on such a responsibiity.. so I'm guessing that she rather just break it off in the meantime until things slow down abit with her family but ofcourse she STILL misses you and the touch.. its only natural that she wants some action when shes with you.

    Shes in a confused state of mind right now but its obvious shes taking the intitive on whats important and telling you straight up that her kid is more important.. she wants action though so you'll need to decide if you can withhold JUST being a fuck buddy for now.. in the meantime, she'll probably still be attached to you.. I just think shes probably a very young mother and you're around her age and her family plays a big influence on her life so shes taking their advice to heart.. which I believe is the right thing for now.

    Hey, btw.. how old are you two and how old is her kid? What happened to the father? Is he around or what..
     
  13. justinhazard

    justinhazard New Member

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    Yes, family is definitely what has swayed her decision. Win her family over and you win her over, honestly. Invite her family (or just her parents) and her over for dinner and just talk with them, tell them what you want in life, what your career goals are etc... Tell them how much you love **** (her kid) and hang out with him/her a lot. If the kid and family begin to like you then your in. Good luck! :x: Is there any reason for the family to not like you? (ie: irresponsible)
     
  14. ady2glude707

    ady2glude707 New Member

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    I am 25 years old and she is 21. The son is 1 yr and 4 months, and the father is a deadbeat dad who is 22-23 yrs old that hardly sees or takes care of his son. He also beat his sons mother, spits at her face, used to cheat on her etc. Hes been hating on me recently, trying to scare and intimidate me over the phone because he wants her back. But that isnt working for him, and she doesnt want to be with him. As for me and the child, I hardly ever see him, but when I do, I play with him as he is one of the happiest kids ive ever seen. Ive been seeing this girl since the summer of 05(when she and babys dad broke up, we didnt start getting close until late Nov though.) I really do like this girl but she also carries baggage like her son and the ex. Im not sure at this moment if she is worth waiting for. Sometimes sex and attention can make me feel like a whole different person, and make me like that person and even "whooped." I dont know, if I meet a person that I like more of course I would move on. All in all i wouldnt mind being a F buddy, but at the same time I dont want her seeing anyone else while we're F'in around. Oh yea forgot to say, I am very cool with the family, I come over at least once a week and have been to family parties before.
     
  15. justinhazard

    justinhazard New Member

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    hmmm.... Well don't know what to tell ya then... At least your fuck buddies anyway! :bigthumb:
     

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