Is making out/sexual contact a big part of a relationship?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by nish81, Sep 6, 2006.

  1. nish81

    nish81 OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jul 6, 2006
    Messages:
    11,182
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    london
    Like the title says - I was just wondering whether making out and other types of sexual contact are a big and/or important part of a relationship? It might seem like a dumb question, but im just asking...i think that SO might feel that im just using her to make out with - but wouldn't she enjoy it as well?

    *confused*
     
  2. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2004
    Messages:
    23,006
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Manhattan
    dude you have serious problems ... women want to fuck.

    your mental state is really shitty about this. you need to go in thinking, "i'm going to do what i want and see if it's also what she wants." just figure out if it's what she wants. if you want reassurance, stop doing it and just talk and see if she comes back for more.
     
  3. Ryuhei

    Ryuhei Oh gawd

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2001
    Messages:
    6,612
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    Chicagoland
    I would agree that it is an integral part of an ADULT relationship but there are lots of types of people out that. I have a 50 year old uncle who is a born again Christian and he won't bone women because he's not married. I think he's a gay for acting that way but hey, I don't live his life.
     
  4. nish81

    nish81 OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jul 6, 2006
    Messages:
    11,182
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    london


    Yeah, that's what I figured too. Just making sure :bigthumb:

    Thanks for the advice - i'll try that next time we meet up.

    by the way, for anyone who's going to ask, i'm 15 years old :x:
     
  5. DenimA4CVT

    DenimA4CVT New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 25, 2003
    Messages:
    134
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Delta, B.C, Canada
    Physical contact is an important part of a healthy relationship. Couple get to know each others more deeply by making love, by using sexual intercourse.
     
  6. u4ikstilz

    u4ikstilz New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 30, 2006
    Messages:
    802
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    The OC, CA
    15y/o chicks love to be touchy feely kissy huggy.
    Get used to it sooner the better.
     
  7. RedVsBlue

    RedVsBlue Penguins > *

    Joined:
    Dec 28, 2004
    Messages:
    7,705
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Another reality apparently
    So by not having any sex he is gay? Pretty sure he would be have to be fucking guys to be gay :dunno:

    To the thread started...you are 15, and for another 5-10 years you wont have a clue what a real relationship is. Have fun, but dont call those little dating flings a relationship :rofl:

    Oh, and just because someone says something you agree with, dont take that as concrete advice. This is the internet and there are alot of people just as immature as you seem to be, which will really get you nowhere.
     
  8. Ryuhei

    Ryuhei Oh gawd

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2001
    Messages:
    6,612
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    Chicagoland
    Definitely. To be a homosexual he'd have to be sexing up other men but I don't really mean homosexual when I call him gay. It's the pop-culture definition of gay. More like ghey. ;)
     
  9. nish81

    nish81 OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jul 6, 2006
    Messages:
    11,182
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    london
    Maybe I'll wait a couple of years before the sex.
    Let me clarify something that might have been misunderstoof: I like the whole kissy/feely thing. It's the SO who seems to think that i might be using her just for that
    It might not be an adult relationship, but its not a dating fling either.
    I'm not sure whether to take that as a compliment or an insult - I think I'll just settle for saying thanks for the advice :x:

    But like I said to u4ikstilz, i might have mis-communicated here: i don't have a problem with touchy-feeliness. its just that the SO thinks i may be going out with her just for that
     
  10. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 22, 2005
    Messages:
    20,480
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Houston, TX
    john is a master pick up artist now :mamoru:
     
  11. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2006
    Messages:
    8,752
    Likes Received:
    0
    how old is she? And it's entirely possible that if she's close to your age, that she's only been in physical relationships.

    You're 15. Just treat her decently, enjoy the good times, and don't worry about this stuff too much. There's no hurry to get anything near serious.
     
  12. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

    Joined:
    May 5, 2002
    Messages:
    57,466
    Likes Received:
    7
    Location:
    the streets
    sex is the basis of male-female relationships, whether you want to face up to that fact or not

    its in our genes, we can't help it. Procreation is one of our most basic drives.
     
  13. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2004
    Messages:
    23,006
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Manhattan
    :rofl: fair enough but I've never had this guy's mental problems
     
  14. Guerilla Grower

    Guerilla Grower New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 17, 2006
    Messages:
    862
    Likes Received:
    0
    Your 15, try to treat women with respect, but only enough so you get laided.
     
  15. BlazinBlazer Guy

    BlazinBlazer Guy Witness to The De-Evolution of Mankind.

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2002
    Messages:
    18,783
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Lansing, MI USA
    So maybe that's why I'm in no hurry for a relationship or to have sex; I don't want kids!!
     
  16. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2004
    Messages:
    23,006
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Manhattan
    No, that's a strange phobia particular to you, BlazinBlazer Guy. Statistics and reality are both incongruent with your perception of the risks involved in having sex. Even anecdotally: a friend of mine who has lost count of the people he's been with is STD clean and has caused no pregnancy. I have had sex many, many times with my gf and from recent tests I find that I am disease-free as well as descendant-free. But anecdotes aside, again, statistically you are out of alignment with actuality. The important thing is to do what you feel comfortable doing, which in your case is not having sex. So don't preach ... but sure, don't fuck, if you don't want to.
     
  17. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2002
    Messages:
    14,236
    Likes Received:
    10
    Location:
    NYC

    :rofl:
     
  18. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

    Joined:
    May 5, 2002
    Messages:
    57,466
    Likes Received:
    7
    Location:
    the streets
    more power to you :bigthumb:
     
  19. nish81

    nish81 OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jul 6, 2006
    Messages:
    11,182
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    london
    :werd:

    well we're much closer to each other than we were when she said that, so i'm gonna try and start up some contact again soon.
     
  20. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

    Joined:
    May 5, 2002
    Messages:
    57,466
    Likes Received:
    7
    Location:
    the streets
    the may sound counter-intuitive, but the longer it takes you to get close, the better off the relationship will be in the long run

    don't be in a hurry to get close
     
  21. nish81

    nish81 OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jul 6, 2006
    Messages:
    11,182
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    london
    yeah, I learnt that from my last relationship :)

    so, a mutual friend, (close to me though) asks her 'so how come you guys are the only couple who never make out?', (when I'm around) and her reasons are basically ' i don't want to ' but I don't really buy that :hs:
    any ideas on what I should do now? it's not that she hates physical contact, because i get great kino with her
     
  22. BlazinBlazer Guy

    BlazinBlazer Guy Witness to The De-Evolution of Mankind.

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2002
    Messages:
    18,783
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Lansing, MI USA
    Was I preaching? I think not.
     
  23. -argonaut-

    -argonaut- New Member

    Joined:
    May 20, 2006
    Messages:
    3,025
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Stranded, NE of where you left me.
    Yes, physical contact is very important to a girl. It helps to incite intimacy, closeness, comfort, security, and warmth.
    You have to understand, as every guy needs to, that girls are creatures of emotions and feelings (a big bundle of them), nothing at all like the rational, objective-oriented beings we are, and it's playing to these that enable a guy to develope intimacy with them.
    I'm not saying come off all sensitive and shit, I'm just saying that girls require "touch" to help them "feel" the message that you're trying to convey and that you're apart of whatever it is that they're going through.
     
  24. nish81

    nish81 OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jul 6, 2006
    Messages:
    11,182
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    london
    Ok, maybe I gave this thread a very misleading title.
    My problem is that the SO doesn't want to make out with me/anything else like that. Everything else in the relationship is great.
     
  25. BlazinBlazer Guy

    BlazinBlazer Guy Witness to The De-Evolution of Mankind.

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2002
    Messages:
    18,783
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Lansing, MI USA
    So really, you're just her cuddle bitch/friendzone pal...
     

Share This Page