SRS is it wrong

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Tripper, Jul 11, 2005.

  1. Tripper

    Tripper Active Member

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    i pay money to a EX to raise a kid we had together,i knew about the kid but due to our relationship at the time i moved away for work reasons, out of the blue she contacts me, just happens before i am returning to visit my family, she didnt know this just i didnt live in the same state anymore, she wants me to see my son, after seeing him and returning to my current location she contacts me about paying money to raise him, she claims her EX was paying this as he wanted to adopt him. And they had a fight over something and know he will not pay. hence asking me for the money, this is being done thru a legal agreement i do not have to pay for the time i didnt only the time since the claim was raised. which i have been doing.


    Now the question i ask am i being selfish by quiting my high paying job to be closer location wise to my son, since the time involed and costs involved in visiting my son are not the best, 3 days drive or a days plane trip each way.
     
  2. tris

    tris New Member

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    Huh? Punctuation is nice, please. :o

    It sounds like there's a Child Support dispute, then?

    Lemme get this straight:

    -You've got a high-paying job

    -You've got a kid that lives 3 days away from you.

    -You've got an ex who raises your kid, also 3 days' travel time away.

    Now, let's examine your options -

    You can:

    A) Pay the money, check by check, month to month, and make sure there's just a 'little extra' to make up for the fact that you can't be there all the time. Kids should understand that sometimes Daddy's career is more important than their petty concerns. It's nothing therapy can't fix later.

    B) Offer to move them both to where YOU live, hence, maybe creating a nice happy family? Just how 'high-paying' is this job?

    Would you sacrifice a comfy bachelor life for living\putting up with your ex, but gain the peace of mind that you AND your child's mother were both "there" during the crucial stages of life?

    G'on and marinate on that for lil' minute...
     
  3. Nightshade

    Nightshade New Member

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    well, man ... if you leave the high paying job, then you risk not getting another one like it back again, and losing income that you could use to provide for your son ...

    personally, I would stay put, and go and visit my son on his holidays, or send him a plane ticket, and he can visit you!!

    if you do get too close, then you and your ex will bump heads, and I must remind you of the reason that you are ex's --> do you need a reminder??

    a day plane trip isn't too bad, if you can get a week off, or something, like his holidays and such, at school ... but yeah ...

    for the time being, I recommend staying put, otherwise you are going to make a mistake that you will later regret!!
     
  4. Tripper

    Tripper Active Member

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    tris
    i do pay her money and i have offered them to move up here and live at my expence on top of child support payments for 6 months so they can find there fett in a new state, also i do not want to get back with the EX just be closer to my son.

    Nightshade i my job is high paying but i can get what i call a decent paying job ie 60k a year, sure a days plane trip isnt bad but when you dont get there till 6pm and fly out at 6am, i would be happy if i was 8 hours drive away.

    Trust me my son will not miss out how many other 5 years olds have a investment property in there name and a share portfolio worth 15k as well
     
  5. P-chan

    P-chan New Member

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    There are plenty without a father. How many would trade?
     
  6. beanolo

    beanolo It does a body good!!!1

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    Yea, I would much rather have money than a father. :hsugh:
     
  7. tris

    tris New Member

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    Now Now.. Let's not corrupt future generations. Let's give them a chance to love and bond with their fathers as some of us have never been able to do. Let's help a generation of children who wouldn't rather trade a parental relationship for a boatload of money. It's your moral duty, kids.

    Tripper, I'm sorry run on sentences own you. I'm also sorry I'm not your kid. Being 5 years old and having an investment property, as well as a trust fund would be pretty dope, considering it's still got what --12-13 years left to a potential maturity point? Damn fine, there, daddy. Want to adopt a cute and needy 20 year old boy?

    Really, though, I can understand your apprehension of cooperating with your ex, but it's gonna have to happen. You can't make a point of contention out of everything, and your cooperation and team effort will yield better results in your child, than infighting. Remember, it takes a village to raise a child.
     
  8. beanolo

    beanolo It does a body good!!!1

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    Good job at funding your son's drug habit when hes old enough to spend it as well. :o
     
  9. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Now i actually was particulary happy with the statement, bring your ex and kid closer to you.

    Would that be a liable option. That way you could see both the kid and remain having your well ass paid job.
     
  10. ItchyDog

    ItchyDog Guest

    Your sons mom needs to prioritize a bit better. Make sure the money is going where it should be.


    OT: Hi Shale :)
     

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