SRS is it weird/bad to talk to ex boyfriend??

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by vibit, Jun 20, 2005.

  1. vibit

    vibit New Member

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    Hm, it's been 6-7 months since we broke up. I thought we can still be friends. I think I may be naive? I messaged him on MSN (he was set to away) and there's no response yet. I feel 'burned'.
     
  2. AmCo

    AmCo Haters goin' Hate

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    im in the same boat! if it was meant to be the person will return. :( but i dont think she will return.
     
  3. johan

    johan Active Member

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    get over it. His lack of response COULD be because he didn't get the message or he's just too busy, or any number of things. But most likely it's because he doesn't want to stir things up again.

    You should try and concentrate on other friends. Make new friends, even.

    It's hard to stay friends -- real friends -- with former lovers. Well, you can do it, but not till a LOT of time has passed. Only then after all of the tension and ill feeling has been long long long long long since buried can you then have a normal friend relationship.

    Until that time...trouble lurks.

    The fact that you feel 'burned' from something so simple as an unreturned msn message is a prime example of what I'm talking about.

    See you still feel 'owed' a response based on your former intimate relationship. You're not ready to be just pals again. Not even close.
     
  4. Nightshade

    Nightshade New Member

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    AmCo meet ViBit, ViBit meet AmCo ...

    Vibit, I don't think you have to worry too much ...

    if you see them alot, then you will cross paths again, but otherwise, just let sleeping dogs lie, and move on!! :bigthumb:
     
    Last edited: Jun 20, 2005
  5. Darrin

    Darrin Eat. Sleep. Arrest People.

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    i was with my ex for 2yrs and u talk up the "oh we can still be friends" but in reality u cant to be honest. you'll be better off without him
     
  6. beanolo

    beanolo It does a body good!!!1

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    :werd:
     
  7. If you're in another relationship, then yes - it's unwise to continue contact with an ex-bf or gf in my opinion. It's a high degree of disrespect in-fact. If not, then it's up to you what you do -- but in most cases they are an ex for a reason, and that reason often transcends your personalities entirely, not just labels such as "exclusive or dating."
     
  8. Faceless

    Faceless New Member

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    Move on w/your life.
     
  9. PaZzEsCo

    PaZzEsCo New Member

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    Me and my boyfriend broke up about 6 months ago also and I tried to still be friends and talk to him. But the thing with that is everytime I called him or saw him he thought that it was a hint that I wanted to get back together with him. And it was not!! I just didn't see why we couldn't be friends still after 4 years together. So my advise to you is don't talk with him, it's over, move on. I think it's EXTREMELY hard to be friends with an ex after it's over.
     
  10. Too many people try to rationalize the label of the relationships they share with people. It's not the label, it's you two. If you two aren't working -- understand why. If you understand why and still can't reconcile, then there is a possibility you'll be better off either not talking, or altering the dyanamics of the relationship.
     
  11. teo

    teo . => ? => !

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    Eh?
    It worked for me, but not until years after the fact. Let it go for now, then revisit the friendship later if the opportunity presents itself. No sense in forcing what should come naturally if at all.
     
  12. KatWoman

    KatWoman •••••••••••

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    Ex's are ex's for a reason. Is it weird/bad to talk to an ex? It depends. If you broke off because the chemistry just wasn't there, but you can still talk as friends without wondering about the "what ifs?" than probably not. If you broke off because of serious issues, and thinking about them/communicating with them leaves a rock in your stomach, then it's probably a bad idea. If you haven't gotten over that person and moved on to better things yet, then it's probably a good idea to just let bygones be bygones and move on.
     
  13. saints17

    saints17 Guest

    My ex broke up with me about 7 months ago.. I badly wanted to be friends. She told me that she wanted to also. I admit, that I really wanted more---but for the friendship, was more than willing to put my feelings aside b/c I cared about our friendship so much. Well---despite what she said, I never got the feeling that she truly wanted to be friends. We'd talk every few weeks---then we didn't talk for about 2 months b/c I told her I thought it would be easier if we didn't. Well, I reinitiated communication, we met.. had coffee---I though the meeting went great. But we haven't talked since.. so.. you just never know.

    Life offers up some stuff that we don't like.. it sucks. But you just have to deal with whatever situation your in at the moment.
     
  14. Bleed

    Bleed New Member

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    I'm a firm believer of cutting all relations after a breakup. :o :hsd:
     
  15. Original

    Original OT Supporter

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    I'm still friends with my ex, though she gets upset and misses me often :dunno:
     
  16. AstroGirl

    AstroGirl If I don't respond it's because I have severe ADD

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    Her mosa? ITS MY MOSA!!!
    I would stay far far away. The fact an un-returned IM upset you shows maybe you still have an inkling of feeling for him. I tried to stay friends with my ex and every time I saw time it was like my heart would stop in my chest. Since then I haven't returned his calls/ texts. And deleted my myspace account :) now it doesn't even bother me anymore. Out of sight, out of mind.
     
  17. driftwell

    driftwell New Member

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    i tried it... didn't really work out as staying friends since we hooked up a few times afterwards... then we went through this period where we barely talked (because she met someone) and it was like we freshly broke up again... it hurt...

    then she tried talking to me again and that time around i was completely pleutonic (SP)... until i found out she was pregnant... then i realized that i still had feelings... otherwise i wouldn't have felt so hurt and betrayed.... haven't spoken to her since... and life's been great
     

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