Intro to a paper i am writing on steroids... v.critique

Discussion in 'Fitness & Nutrition' started by deuceforty, Apr 16, 2007.

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  1. deuceforty

    deuceforty between rupture and rapture

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    anything else i should add to the intro?
     
  2. igo4bmx

    igo4bmx WHAT WHAT WHAT THE FU OT Supporter

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    you gotta use the word bro in every other phrase like a true musclehead
     
  3. michael

    michael FLORIDA > *

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    I'll edit in a sec. That's a grammatical trainwreck :o
     
  4. Damnation

    Damnation OT Supporter

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    it's like an orgy of grammar problems
     
  5. michael

    michael FLORIDA > *

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    .
     
  6. deuceforty

    deuceforty between rupture and rapture

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    i am a grammatical trainwreck... to say the least
     
  7. MaineSucks

    MaineSucks OT Supporter

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    I'd love to see you bring up the current state of shit in America. A woman can, after passing a psych exam, be legally prescribed testosterone. No blood work, no questions asked, to become a man. A man, however, needs to go through blood tests and doctor approval to become.... more of a man?

    Also, spend some time on PubMed
     
  8. deuceforty

    deuceforty between rupture and rapture

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    wtf is pubmed? im on am and bb
     
  9. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    www.pubmed.gov
     
  10. deuceforty

    deuceforty between rupture and rapture

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  11. MaineSucks

    MaineSucks OT Supporter

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    search the title @ scholar.google.com

    and try to use your college's research tools on campus. They have access to a shitload of articles/publications
     
  12. Genghis.Tron

    Genghis.Tron New Member

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    I think that the soy/isoflavones/estrogen issue is also another interesting to bring up. We have no idea how little boys brought up on soy milk will be affected by it because of the phyotestrogen but apparently soy is not such an issue. Yet, they suggest menopausal women to eat around 30g of soy protein a day to get the hormonal changes associated with it.
    But if someone wants to get something in his body while being fully aware of what he's doing, there's a problem.
     
  13. dmaestro

    dmaestro New Member

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  14. Damnation

    Damnation OT Supporter

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    was it alwyn cosgrove that said that? i remember hearing it
     
  15. MaineSucks

    MaineSucks OT Supporter

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  16. Memor

    Memor Active Member

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    I don't know if opening with a quote from Blades of Glory is the best way to start off a serious paper on steroids in contemporary society
     
  17. michael

    michael FLORIDA > *

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    You're fucking welcome, btw. :p
     
  18. kronik85

    kronik85 New Member

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    pinpoint what it is that you're discussing with steroids. your opening paragraph should directly state what the paper is about.

    are you discussing steroids as portrayed in movies? the false negative light that shrouds steroids? history of steroids and where they come from? steroid use/abuse in sports? other drugs use/abuse in sports? the THG scandal? the athlete's mentality and drive to seek out steroid use?

    you have like 10 mini topics in your intro paragraph. steroids is a highly generalized subject. you could be talking about corticosteroids, androgens, estrogens... all steroids. pick a topic, narrow down what you want to talk about and educate people about.
     
  19. kronik85

    kronik85 New Member

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    also, starts citing some sources from the get go. makes it alot easier than going back and citing later. you dont even need a proper citation, just a URL, or book title/author) to help you later.
     
  20. deuceforty

    deuceforty between rupture and rapture

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    "These issues bring about the debate over how far athletes will go to use performance enhancing drugs, and what drives them to steroids in the first place."


    and mike, you are my god... seriously..

    and this shit has to be 8 pages, so trust me all of your ideas are going to be implemented.. im putting in valentino and the whole synthol bullshit too
     
  21. Memor

    Memor Active Member

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    Kronik means that regardless of whether you have that sentence or not in there, you can't go and throw all these random facts and mini topics in your thesis paragraph. Stay focused and to the point in it, then branch out once you start the body. And again, I need to reiterate...don't start out a serious paper with a quote from a comedy movie. You're going to want the teacher to take you seriously.
     
  22. gstrdr1

    gstrdr1 Active Member

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    :werd: I think this should get a decent amount of attention in your paper
     
  23. deuceforty

    deuceforty between rupture and rapture

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    Purpose and Audience
    The focus of this unit is on issues of interpretation and evaluation, processes at the heart of humanistic inquiry. For this project you will do a close reading of an artistic text or medium and then write a paper in which you discuss how your cultural texts exemplify an aspect of our culture and/or society; you will do so with your own analysis of the connection between the text and culture and with two published interpretations of that text. You may focus on an individual text--for example, a particular novel, poem, film, or political document on which multiple authors have commented. Or you can choose an artistic medium or genre as your focus of study: graffiti, TV crime dramas or reality shows, marketing campaigns, political campaigns. In this case you should employ no more than three texts that are closely related thematically. The primary criterion is that the text or topic must have generated some discussion in academic journals and it must relate to current issues (2000-2006); your goal is to articulate the connection that our society has with these texts (and vice versa) and to explore the interpretive complexities that scholars have raised. The assignment is designed to help you (1) explore the nature of interpretation by examining how texts are cultural symbols, (2) apply your understanding of written argument to an analysis of arguments based on personal and cultural values rather than data, and (3) continue to familiarize yourself with online research databases and conventional ways of citing and describing the work of other authors.
    Your paper should be written for an audience of fellow students who may recognize the artistic text or medium you are studying but who are not necessarily familiar with the critical discussion surrounding that text. Your aim is to introduce these novice academics to the interpretive issues raised by this text.

    Focus and Scope of Analysis
    Essentially, you are writing an essay that shows how a text (or two or three) exemplifies an aspect of our culture. For example, you might discuss how the MTV show “Two-a-Days” and the extremely high ratings of “Monday Night Football” implicate a culture obsessed with a violent sport. In this discussion, you would need to interpret aspects of the texts that show the type of violence or symbolic militarism that our culture seems to enjoy. Also, whenever possible, you would need to rely on your journal articles to corroborate your observations on the texts and your observations of them. The essay that results from these connections would not only illuminate an aspect of our culture through the lens of texts, but it would also be credible as a result of the support from experts.
     
  24. DTR rex

    DTR rex New Member

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    You should have just let him turn in the original copy and laughed at the excessive amount of red his paper would contain.
     
  25. deuceforty

    deuceforty between rupture and rapture

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    i suck so much at school its ridiculous... im working my ass off just to be eligible to play next semester...
     
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