even though I shouldn't, the friends I normally bring this up to are busy with their own shit. so here's the story: I met a Spanish girl three weeks ago. she is, unfortunately, everything I've wanted in a girl. so I became instantly attracted to her. found out she has a BF at home, so I kept telling myself not to get invested. (even if she didn't have one, I felt she'd have plenty of better guys to choose from (that's not a dig at myself, just a reality)) but the more I tell myself that, the worse it got. I still don't quite get it, there are plenty of attractive girls here, why am I fixed on this one? anyway, it all came to a head tonight when we were out and I sort of saw a self-fulfilling prophecy... she -might- be cheating or half-cheating or have an open relationship with her home boyfriend with this other guy. pretty nice guy, but fuck I couldn't take it when I saw what I think I saw when we were out. I grabbed my shit and left. slept at the bus stop until the next bus came. made it home. I feel like dick and none of my asshole friends are up. funny thing is, I don't think anyone realises I'm into her. I'm a skilled actor by trade. this thread doesn't make any sense, does it... shit.