edit - no cliffs. When I was a little kid I took Karate. It was awesome (until I realized how much more effective MMA is... no MMA hijacking this thread please ). Some of the things we learned were to not fight unless you had to, and of course, "he who fights and runs away, lives to fight another day." Haha. But seriously, I think this mindset got to my head and I find myself doing very un-alpha things. It is alpha to "take up a lot of space." When walking through crowds, I take up the least amount of space possible to facilitate quick movement between people. I'll yield to someone coming in my direction because it's quicker, easier, and more efficient than trying to head them off, or bumping into them. Yielding is beta. I know that this is a specific example, but this example is like a metaphor for almost all my social interactions. I "blend in" in a crowd. Blending in is beta. I think I watched too many ninja movies as a kid. I can move through huge rooms of people without being noticed. While this has its advantages (stfu I'm not a stalker), it's not alpha and doesn't get you noticed with the ladies. Then again, it doesn't get you noticed by anyone, which is kind of a survival trait on it's own. Ha! A paradox, since being alpha is about surviving. I de-escalate fights. Ok, this is not alpha, but it's also intelligent. I've de-escalated a few fights before, which I partially attribute to my being able to think before I act (which is seriously a trait most people do not possess, in my experience), and partially to the fact that I've never been in a situation where I thought fighting was a good idea. Sorry, your gf bumped into me and spilled her drink... you want to fight? Ok tough guy. Whoops, you bumped into me cuz your drunk ass can't walk straight? That's definately my fault so I see why you want to fight. (I apologize, I used logic there (and sarcasm), and most people cannot understand logic, so naturally the urge to *smash* is stronger than the urge to *think*). Anyway, fighting is stupid unless your life is in danger. So far, knock on wood, it has never been life or death. I'd rather look like a pussy and NOT get some dude's HIV blood on me (or be jumped by 50 of his fratboy friends), than get into a fight in most situations. I cannot maintain eye contact with people. This one pisses me off to no end. Even walking past a random person in the mall or on the street, I don't know where to look, but I certainly can't look them in the eye. If I do, I feel like I'm escalating something. Maybe I just went to college with aggressive people . If I try to hold someone's eye contact, my eyes tear up (dunno why) and then I look like I'm crying. Crying certainly isn't alpha. When a chick makes eye contact with me, I'm afraid of giving off "creepy stalker vibes," so I break eye contact. Maybe I'm just not confident enough to hold it. Or I get that eye-tearing-up thing. Same thing with a dude. Eye contact with dudes = fights. I'd rather not fight, see above. And if I'm making eye contact with a dude or a chick, I'm always thinking "I wonder what they're thinking. Why are they holding eye contact? Are they wondering what I'm thinking? Are they taking this as aggression? Do they think I'm a creepy stalker? I don't want to be the creepy stalker." I'm calm. When someone cuts me off, I don't get pissed. I don't typically have road rage. I assume they are having a bad day, or did it on accident, and I give them the benefit of the doubt. I'm pretty sure this isn't alpha/beta, but has more to do with being mature and intelligent... I hope Some dude rear ended me the other day (I'm talking about a car accident ), and the first thing I said was "are you ok?" Most people would've been like "wtf you asshole fucking little shit..." This is why I have contempt for so many people. I try not to be a misanthrope, but it's hard. I could go on, but you get the drift. I have to fucking ingrain these concepts in my head because apparently knowing that I'm doing things wrong is not enough. I need to give off more confident vibes. At least writing this has helped. Now the whole vag forum knows I'm a pussy, but at least I can admit it. I'm not saying I want to be a frat boy douche bag and beat people who look at me funny, but you know what I mean. I think some of the actions I have developed are not the most alpha/confident/etc. I hate that. But in my own little world, my methods have served me well. I've even dated a couple girls that thought it was cool that I had a calm temper and wasn't a "frat boy douche bag" (no offence to anyone in fraternities here, but you know what I mean, so save the flames). But I want more power. I want to walk into a room and own it... not be the ninja who no one notices.