SRS I'm losing my identity!!

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by CrazyFoool, Mar 12, 2008.

  1. CrazyFoool

    CrazyFoool OT Supporter

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    I goto clubs each week and pick up random women. When my friends come out w/ me, they expect me to pick up women when infact, I just want to have fun w/ my friends. I do well w/ women, and its fun but I do so just because its something fun to talk about. When my friends come in from out of town, its kind of uncomfortable bc of the expectation put on me. The more I do this, the more of myself I feel like i'm losing.

    I'm not saying all girls love me and I don't feel good about being able to socialize but sometimes its just so shallow. I'm not saying club people are shallow, just that when you first meet someone, you try and put your best face forward. normal people goto clubs too so please don't attack clubgoers just bc you don't like clubs. The issue I have is that I have about 150 phone numbers over the last 2 years living here in california and of course I can't get to know all of them...and i guess when i don't, i feel a sense of how shallow it is.

    I also have a huge problem w/ committment so that doesnt help at all.

    I'm a sociopath when i'm out and afterwards. The more I lose myself, the more pressure I feel...but I can't just take that pressure off because there are times at the clubs where I will go out of my way to meet certain women and play the game even tho I know It won't work out. I started all this just to build confidence. its helped me in a lot of areas in life where communication is key. Now its just making me tired...
     
  2. Yuppy

    Yuppy Have a seat right there....

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    yea if im single my friends expect me to get myselt women and then get some for them.... i dont let the pressure get to me though.... how are they pressuring you?

    phone numbers dont mean shit, 6-8 numbers in a night is no big deal. the only number that matters is 1. The 1 you are going home with that evening.

    just kuz you get a number. it doesnt really mean anything until youve had sex with the girl. some girls will give their number to get you to stop talking to them. or kuz they are doing something else, or they are just so blackout drunk they wont remember you when you call.

    You should change your focus from getting numbers to getting a girl to go home with you to have sex. :dunno:
     
  3. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Here's a thought....don't pick up women just for your friends amusement!

    If they peer pressure you, give them a guilt trip that you'd rather hang out with them. If they bug you further they are only being your friends to try and pick up stray women...and that's not a friend.
     
  4. JordanClarkson

    JordanClarkson OT Supporter

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    Explain to your friends that when you go out with them you just want it to be "guy night" with no females involved. ;)
     
  5. CrazyFoool

    CrazyFoool OT Supporter

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    well, they go out to try and pick up women as well. so when i'm supposedly good at it, theres a level of expectation each time we go out.
    They want to know how I open and want to see it first hand.

    last week, a girl i met 10 minutes before left me her purse, so she can go tell her friends that she was w/ me. Why did she trust me? i could have stolen her shit. When she left to her friends briefly, I had some chocolate cake w/ me at the club...I know the owner of the club and he pulls out random shit for me lol...and i started feeding the blondes close by me. My friends were just around watching all this. that part was all natural so its not like i was going out of my way to impress anyone, and my friends saw that. So basically unless I purposely make it so that I don't have fun, this shit isn't going to end.
     
  6. CrazyFoool

    CrazyFoool OT Supporter

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    thats hard to do bc guys like women when they're drunk so they're always actively trying to pick up as much info as possible when they know I might be able to help them.

    it may start out as guys night out...but guys night out in real life terms means to go find women bc thats what guys do.
     
  7. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    Mad PUA skillz in this thread.
     
  8. Pringles

    Pringles New Member

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    Why not try something new then if your not enjoying yourself? Maybe you should lift friday/saturday nights. Then you'll see dedication. Or maybe you should join a club that bowls every weeknight. Sounds like your trying to fix a problem by not doing anything. Thats not how the world works :hsd:
     
  9. M.E.

    M.E. New Member

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    you're an idiot.
     
  10. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Ban

    This is The Asylum....perhaps you missed that these are serious discussions only. :gtfo:
     
  11. CrazyFoool

    CrazyFoool OT Supporter

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    not all came from the club. I do meet girls at school, and at places you probably want to meet girls too. coffee shops, etc.
     
  12. CrazyFoool

    CrazyFoool OT Supporter

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    Its not that I don't ever enjoy it. I do enjoy meeting women a lot of times but almost everytime afterwards, i feel like my sense of self has diminished.

    my core group of friends here in california are pretty old. I just moved 2 weeks ago so i'm sure ill figure out the friends issue over time, but i definitely need to meet more people to be friends w/.
     
  13. Lucky Penny

    Lucky Penny Mr. cut me some slack cause I don't wanna go back,

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    at your mom's house. be back later.
    :rofl::rofl::rofl: If you guys only knew how many times I've given out Papa John's phone number to guys like this


    Yuppy's right- the only number that counts is the one you're actually going to call. If you don't want to pick up chicks that night then don't. Sounds like you need a break from this whole scene though.
     
  14. CrazyFoool

    CrazyFoool OT Supporter

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    I almost never call a fake number. Not recently at least, maybe when I was 21. I'm now 25. I don't think it would bother me much if i'm getting more than one number each night i go out. The people who flake out, arne't my friends and the ones who dont flake, are potentially my friends. I really don't get butthurt about it. I think its bc of my committment issues.
    A lot of times, Ill get text msgs the next day from the girls. About the break, yes I do need a break. thing is, next week my friends from LA are coming up...

    Its just a whole mess of "feelings" i'm getting after going out and the pressure builds and builds.

    oh and whats your aim? Do you go clubbing a lot? :mamoru:
     
    Last edited: Mar 13, 2008
  15. Lucky Penny

    Lucky Penny Mr. cut me some slack cause I don't wanna go back,

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    at your mom's house. be back later.
    :rofl: I didn't mean you, I meant guys who badger you for your number all night and can't catch a hint. Those are the guys who get PJ's number

    Are you friends that pressed on going out and picking up chicks? You could stick it out for one more week I guess, then take a serious hiatus. :dunno:
    What's with the commitment issues you keep bringing up?

    Aim's in the friend thread :wavey:
     
  16. CrazyFoool

    CrazyFoool OT Supporter

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    So yesterday a "friend" from nyc flew into SF before flying to korea. She was only suppose to be here 2 hours for the layover but her flight got cancelled. So I went to hang out w/ her. This is the girl that screwed my head up a few years ago and I basically vowed to be more confident about how I carry myself. I knew I wasn't very confident back in the day and I hated it. We had/have an intense love/hate relationship. All this happened in Seattle but we both moved...she to ny first then I moved to the bay area. Life changed for teh better for me after I made my commitment to be more confident and do whatever it took. fast forward to today...yesterday, i struck me how awful our relationship has turned out because we both are have our gaurd up so high that the little time we had together couldn't be special at all. This is the girl that I used to go look for the most unique and funnest things to do with...a date isnt movie and dinner..it would be anything that was exciting. So today, I am "sad" not bc I miss this person but bc our relationship has gotten to what looks like an unrepairable couple that eats dinner together w/o saying a word to one another. why am i writing this? bc I'm almost certain this is where my commitment issue stems from. I wasn't good enough back then, I would always give in...and to this day, I don't know if all those people I meet will accept me so I take off running before anything super serious can take place. I have done serious, but never 100%...

    tonight I'm once again asked to go out...but after yesterday, I just don't have it in me tonight.
     

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