Before I start let me just say that I suffer from pretty bad anxiety disorder. I can't keep my mind on track and have trouble containing or channeling my feelings and emotions... The girl I've been with for the past 8 months moved to the city to pursue her dreams in modeling and acting. We were attached at the hip and then at the end of the summer she decided in a matter of days. I took it extremely hard at first and my many insecurities began to surface and my emotions went haywire. She's been moved in for two weeks and I went and visited her at the end of the first week. Needless to say, I still was a bit unstable about it and the visit didn't go as smoothly as possible, but strangely enough our relationship has become stronger because of it. I'm extremely supportive and happy when we speak (every day) to each other and I don't let it show that deep down my insecurities are still festering. I can't focus on school and I'm two weeks behind in classes and feel that it's nearly impossible to catch up. If I fuck my school up (I fucked up last semester when we were together bringing my gpa from 3.7 to 3.2, pretty much ruining my chances of grad school in the city) I'm done and so is this relationship, still I'm so caught up in constantly thinking about her that I cannot stay focused. I'm a skinny kid and that's something I'm insecure about as well. I promised my self I was going to start a diet and a routine when my girl moved away to get into a healthy routine and surprise her with my progress. I haven't been able to get into a good routine because I'm on such a roller coaster. I've always been tired and my mood and appetite has been so shitty recently. I pretty much gave up what little social life I had when we got together and at the time I didn't give a shit. It's not that I want one because I need to make myself stronger at this point, and I really have no time for much of a social life considering my school schedule and what is at stake, but secretly it eats at me that my girlfriend is in the city making new friends every day and I'm stuck in this little boring shithole town with the same like-minded people. I just can't stop dwelling. I'm in a conundrum because I can't get focused because I'm still so stuck in the relationship, but if I ultimately fuck up school my chances of making this relationship work in the long run are about nil. We still love each other more than anything but my insecurities always seem to get the best of me and have me thinking negatively. This is very unhealthy and I guess I'm just gonna go talk to a school psychologist. Any exercises I can practice to help in overcoming this? I know if I just get into my own routine and schedule I will ultimately feel better and my girl will be more confident in everything, but deep down I feel deserted and lonely now and so far behind that I'm just gonna lose everything any way. I don't see my future looking positive considering where I sit academically. My resume is shit and I have practically no experience outside of the classroom in the subjects I'm studying. All I do is worry worry worry and eat at myself. It's so unhealthy. I used to be so confident about school and took comfort in the fact that my academic standing was such I could do whatever I wanted with my life. Now I've met the girl of my dreams but fucked my life up. If I don't get straight I will lose everything. I'm dying inside.