SRS I'm Done

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Matrixballer04, Jan 1, 2008.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. Matrixballer04

    Matrixballer04 New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 1, 2005
    Messages:
    229
    Likes Received:
    0
    Background:

    I started off smoking marijuana last year in October. I smoked every weekend with my best friend. Then it gradually grew and grew until I was smoking daily, going to school high. I never got caught though (Thank god).

    Then in January my parents called the cops on me for drug paraphernalia. I got a citation, court was postponed until March 28. I continued to smoke another 2 times with said friend and then quit due to court date. On March 27th, I did something incredibly stupid. I took allergy medicine to get high. I ended up taking 1200mg of Diphenhydramine HCl. I wound up in the ICU for a day and through a blood test, I was shown to have benzos, oxycodone, and some other drug in my system. Those came from ingesting a cotton rod of Propylhexadrine from a Benzadrex inhaler.

    Court happened, I was told to be in rehab within two weeks or I violate probation. During those 2 weeks, I violated probation by getting suspended from school due to being on drug related websites. I was escorted out of the school in handcuffs and placed in a Juvenile Detention Center for 2 days. I went back to court the morning of the 3rd day I was in the detention center. I was told I would have to come back to court the following Tuesday to review my case.

    Went back and I was placed into States Custody where I was sent to a group home an hour away from home. I stayed there for a month for an evaluation to see if I had a drug problem. I was then placed in another group home for 4 months 2 hours away from home. I attended Rehab there for 4 weeks. I left with the same attitude as I did when I went in.

    Now...I get out of the group home, I get off probation in November, and I start smoking marijuana again. My dad constantly thinks I am doing drugs. If I take more than 2 allergy pills he says I am doing it to get high. If I answer the phone wierd, he asks me what I'm on. I'm just tired of all the bullshit and lies.

    It's time to get my life back on track and make something out of myself besides the fat, lazy, jobless slob that I am now.

    Not 10 minutes ago I flushed the rest of my bud, flushed my seeds, crushed my lightbulb vape, threw away my homemade pipe, and now I am waiting for a friend to come by to take this pipe off my hands.

    That friend failed a drug test yesterday for his mom for THC. He hasn't quit yet, but I hope he sees what it is doing to his life and that he quits soon.

    But that is my story. I am done with drugs.

    -Matt
     
  2. Matrixballer04

    Matrixballer04 New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 1, 2005
    Messages:
    229
    Likes Received:
    0
    Hahaha...I'll quit after tonight. Tonight was like my going away party. I smoked 2 grams to the dome and I quit after this. No more.
     
  3. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2006
    Messages:
    32,407
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    OKC
    For me, drinking and drug issues went much deeper than actually drinking and using. There were serious issues in my life and I just couldn't cope without drinking and drugs. When life got too difficult, I'd just run to the bottle.

    If you find you can't stay quit or that you aren't at peace when not using, perhaps it's time to seek help from those who have been there and found a way out??

    Good luck.
     
  4. bijan814

    bijan814 New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 22, 2006
    Messages:
    19
    Likes Received:
    0
    GoodJob, I just quit Oxy last week
     
  5. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 19, 2005
    Messages:
    36,662
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    this toilet earth
    and never posted again...
     
  6. Matrixballer04

    Matrixballer04 New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 1, 2005
    Messages:
    229
    Likes Received:
    0
    Haha....I haven't touched marijuana since that day.

    I have on the other hand taken a few pills.

    Klonopin, lorazepam, morphine, and a few others. But it was only for a week and that was because I found all of those pills...lmfao.

    But, other than that, the only thing I have been doing now is drinking a few beers with friends. I had 5 last Sunday night and 4 the next night (Monday).
     
  7. Hate Crime

    Hate Crime Don't Hate OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2006
    Messages:
    5,255
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Minnesota
    :rofl:





    :o
     
  8. GooeyGus

    GooeyGus I has Laz0rz.

    Joined:
    Jun 5, 2006
    Messages:
    1,618
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Marysville, WA
    And what if you just FOUND some weed? You would think it was ok to smoke it because you found it?

    Its all fun and games until you need a needle in your arm to get out of bed in the morning :)
     
  9. Matrixballer04

    Matrixballer04 New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 1, 2005
    Messages:
    229
    Likes Received:
    0
    Nah...Actually, me and a friend were going throuhg his dad's room (His dad is in rehab) and I just happened to find those pills. He works at a hospital and they were all still sealed in the little packagings.

    I just decided, ya know, you gotta try everything once. It's nothing I would turn to again.

    And, no. If I just found weed lying somewhere I would not smoke it.

    I would sell it to a friend....duh....lmfao.

    And I don't think I'm really done with it. I'm working on getting a job now and I pretty much have one ligned up that pays $13.78/hour so it's good.

    But I also will not be smoking like I was almost every day. Just on special occasions. Birthdays, holidays, 4/20, etc....ya dig?
     
  10. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2006
    Messages:
    32,407
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    OKC
    Hmm....I wonder if you think this way in regards to homosexuality also?

    What about eating poo? What about killing someone?

    You don't have to try everything once. You are seriously just using that as a convenient justification to satisfy your desire to use. This is very common among the chemically addicted.
     
  11. GooeyGus

    GooeyGus I has Laz0rz.

    Joined:
    Jun 5, 2006
    Messages:
    1,618
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Marysville, WA
    Werd... addict in the works unfortunately.

    Good luck with the weed on "special occasions" :mamoru: (special occasion eventually = days that end in "y" once your brain tricks you into thinking so)
     
  12. Matrixballer04

    Matrixballer04 New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 1, 2005
    Messages:
    229
    Likes Received:
    0
    Homosexuality, sure why not.

    Like I said, everything rational once.

    No I would not eat shit or kill someone :rolleyes:

    And no I'm not using that as an excuse. I seriously would do anything once. Skydiving, drugs, scuba diving, hang gliding, etc. If given the chance, why back down ;)

    But I am not like some of you guys where dependency develops. I do not easily get addicted to anything.

    If it ever became a problem, then sure I would take a look at my life and get the help I needed.

    And as for doing marijuana everyday? Yea...you do know marijuana isn't addictive and anyone who says otherwise is just a dumbass and uses that as an excuse to smoke everyday.
     
  13. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2006
    Messages:
    32,407
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    OKC
    You don't even realize how common these ideas are among the chemically addicted. The whole "I can quit whenever I want" mantra was and still is very, very common.

    But good luck with that.
    More and more evidence of the addictive properties of pot are being discovered all the time. The way you characterize it tho, implies that it's "harmless"...that's something that simply isn't true.
     
  14. GooeyGus

    GooeyGus I has Laz0rz.

    Joined:
    Jun 5, 2006
    Messages:
    1,618
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Marysville, WA
    :rofl:
    I said the exact same thing so many times to people. You do realize that your whole "try everything once" idea is like the foundation for addiction right? Addiction isn't being dependent on something. Addicts are born addicts. Addiction is the drive that makes us want to try these things in the first place. (just once..... 'till I find something I like).
     
  15. urbanlegend

    urbanlegend One Love

    Joined:
    Oct 10, 2006
    Messages:
    6,436
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Eternal City / Toronto

    Amen. I've tried explaining this to a couple of friends and they won't have any of it.
     
  16. Matrixballer04

    Matrixballer04 New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 1, 2005
    Messages:
    229
    Likes Received:
    0
    You guys are idiots. Addicts aren't born.

    I am not an addict.

    I can quit anything I want.

    Hell, I smoked weed for 2 months straight, everyday, going through a half ounce a week.

    I havent touched it sine New Years Eve

    I used morphine, ativan, klonopin, lorazapam, once and I am NOT addicted. I haven't had the slightest urge to use it at all.

    I am NOT addicted to anything.

    You guys are just dumbassas and use the "Oh...I'm addicted...I can't quit!" boo hoo bullshit cause you aren't man enough to deal with your life so you decide to turn to everything else.

    I myself was locked up in states custody for fuckin 5 months without a damn thing and not ONCE did I have one urge to do any drugs.

    I am such a far better person than ANY of you guys could ever be.

    I have control over my life.

    Guess it sucks for you guys. You can't ontrol yourself so you turn to the addiction excuse and think it's alright.

    Fucking pussies.
     
  17. GooeyGus

    GooeyGus I has Laz0rz.

    Joined:
    Jun 5, 2006
    Messages:
    1,618
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Marysville, WA
    lol... fucking moron. :rofl:

    EDIT: But I did speak too soon. Yes addicts ARE born. You have no idea what the disease of addiction truly is if you cant agree with that. I cant call you a fucking moron, because unfortunately part of having the disease is thinking you can quit any time you want, which leads you to take more risks, thinking it will never happen to you. I'm done here, no one can change what you're going to do. If you never run in to trouble, that is honestly a really good thing. But if you do, you know where to find help.
     
  18. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2006
    Messages:
    32,407
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    OKC
    Interesting....many who have learned about their own addictions would strongly disagree with you.
    Very, very common statement among the chemically dependent.
    :rofl:
    That doesn't mean shit....NYE was what 3/4 weeks ago? :rofl:

    Hell during the latter stages of my drinking/using, I once went 4 months just to prove to my brother that I wasn't an alcoholic. I passed his little fucking test and I could have gone longer.

    The thing is, passing this test didn't cure my disease and once I went back to the drugs and alcohol, I was right back where I left off.
    I hope for your sake you aren't.

    But being addicted to a specific substance like morphine is different than the disease of chemical addiction.

    Chemical addiction is complex and involves behavioral traits. Many addicts and alcoholics will use other drugs in order to "prove" they aren't chemically dependent. They say things like, "See, I'm not drinking so I can't be an alcoholic" meanwhile they're downing handfuls of pills.

    They honestly believe this makes sense but they are missing the fact that they are still medicating their feelings. No they may not be addicted to one particular substance but that that doesn't mean they are sober and in an healthy frame of mind.
    Try dealing with life without ever again drinking and using. It's not easy at all, especially for people that like to drink and use.

    I find it interesting that you get so defensive about our posts in this thread. We haven't attacked you personally yet you resort to a personal attack in response. Perhaps we're "hitting a little close to home"?

    Damn that sucks....sorry to hear that.
    Funny....you don't know any of us nor how "good/bad" we are.
    Good for you. I really hope you don't have chemical addiction.
    Nope it doesn't suck because I've found a way to live without having to use drugs and alcohol. I've found a way of life that offers peace and serenity. I've found a way of life that's helped be become more successful than I ever thought possible....not only in business but also in my personal relationships. If found joy and happiness and most importantly, freedom from drugs and alcohol.

    I'm full of hope and excitement about the future and I've made some fantastic new friendships along the way. This is a way different attitude than I had when I was drinking and using.

    So all in all, no....it doesn't suck at all.
    More personal attacks that are unnecessary.
     
  19. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 19, 2005
    Messages:
    36,662
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    this toilet earth
    Read the rules about posting in R2R- and enjoy the vacation!

    :wavey:
     
  20. glen5839

    glen5839 LS1 Elitist Prick Mod Super Moderator

    Joined:
    Jul 30, 2001
    Messages:
    148,250
    Likes Received:
    764
    Location:
    Houston Tx
    Banned for a month.
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.

Share This Page