SRS Im about to come clean and..

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by TonyMontana, May 8, 2007.

  1. TonyMontana

    TonyMontana Black and Gold

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    Ok so I made a post awhile back about me seeing some girl that my best friend had a thing with but never asked out. Ok well we have been hooking up quite a bit and I even knew that he wanted to go out with her. Well shit hit the fan and I have decided to come clean about the whole thing to him and my ex who im still close with, even though I know its going to ruin my life competely (My friends will never trust me agian, my ex will be crushed) Iv never felt this kind of pain before and I just cant believe its my fault this is all happening.
     
  2. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    Why do you need to tell your ex? Why will she be crushed? She is your ex, meaning she is not with you right now. Does she expect you to just wait around for her to decide to get back together with her? You guys broke up, it's expected that you will have eventually moved on.

    Your friend will survive. We don't always get people we have a crush on.

    Seriously, you don't have that much to worry about.
     
  3. registeredPORK

    registeredPORK Happy Poo Poo

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    To tell you the truth, it's irrelevant for your ex-girlfriend to know about this. More or less, it's like rubbing sand in her face.

    On the other hand, as long as your best friend had an opportunity to ask the girl out, and to hang out with her and so forth, I don't see why he would need to make it bigger then it really is. Sure, you two are best buds and all but this type of situation really shouldn't put it on the whole trust issue thing. It's silly and childish (IMO).

    And honestly, your best friend really doesn't need to know about your love life either--it's your prerogative--your business.

    I can understand that because it was a girl he liked, you told him about it and he should appreciate that you actually just came clean with it.

    When I hear about two friends (two very good friends) fight over for a girl or a guy, it makes me slightly embarressed to know that they would rather risk their friendship over a romantic relationship.

    Hopefully your friends sees that...
     
  4. TonyMontana

    TonyMontana Black and Gold

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    Ok, its alot worse than i first posted. My ex is still in love with me, and my best friend hooks up with this chick sometimes and was planning on asking her out soon. I lied to them both as did she on more than 1 ocassion, and now I know Im a horrible person
     
  5. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    Well, regarding your ex, that's her problem if she isn't over you. Your life should not be based on how an ex gf feels. If you like this new girl, be with her.

    I will get on you for lying to your friend...if he had said something aboout asking her out while you were with her, you should have just been a man, and told him you are with her now.

    How old are you and these other people?
     
  6. TonyMontana

    TonyMontana Black and Gold

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    all 19 my ex is 18. I have to tell him now and I am dreading it we are leaving college soon and I iwll probobly never get to see him agian
     
  7. GregFarz78

    GregFarz78 New Member

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    I don't think you did anything wrong your friend waited too long to ask her out and I wouldn't even tell your ex its none of her business anymore
     
  8. TonyMontana

    TonyMontana Black and Gold

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    I slept with my ex after sleeping with this other chick. The situation is sort of hard to describe but it alot worse than what its made out to be. I am the worst person in the world and because I couldnt control myself my best friend will never forgive me.
     
  9. GregFarz78

    GregFarz78 New Member

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    damn well thats kinda fucked up still leading your ex on :sad2:
     
  10. TonyMontana

    TonyMontana Black and Gold

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    Yeah I have no idea why I did that. They say everyone makes mistakes but this is beyond a mistake I knew this would happen and I dont know how to deal with the pain
     
  11. TonyMontana

    TonyMontana Black and Gold

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    Honestly I dont know what to do. I have no one to turn to everyone hates me for what Ive done and I dont blame any of them. I cant live my life in disgrace of myself
     
  12. TonyMontana

    TonyMontana Black and Gold

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    Ok so an update on the situation at hand. I've come clean with everyone, and im living in seclusion right now, just staying at home and watching tv, computer etc. I wish I was dead. Its aweful knowing the pain you've put someone into not even meaning to and I have no idea how to deal with it. Anyone else been in a similar situation?
     
  13. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Somewhat similar but not exactly. The pain will pass, feelings will mend and you'll may be friends with them all in time....just give it time.
     
  14. Dorn

    Dorn New Member

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    I think it was a mistake telling your ex. Like someone already said, she's your ex. You guys aren't together, so you have nothing to hold you down there. Yeah, you guys slept with each other, but whatever. Had you made it clear that you would not be back together anytime soon, or did you leave that door open that if things kept going good, you could be with her soon again?

    The friend, I don't know. Yeah, you kind of screwed him over, especially if this other girl developed feelings for you based on what was happening. But again, if it was made clear that it was no strings attached with the girl, I don't see it being a problem. There's too many scenarios that could make it incredibly bad, but there's also a lot of scenarios that could make it ok
     

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