SRS I wonder if I'll ever get anywhere relationship-wise

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by VladTemplar, Oct 7, 2007.

  1. VladTemplar

    VladTemplar New Member

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    Pre-note: This is slightly venting, but I'm making a point too.

    Upfront, I'm overweight. I'm no longer obese, however. I used to weigh in at 380 pounds and after I sat in an airline seat and couldn't fasten the seatbelt I was determined to change. I now weigh in around 270. Still overweight, but much more socially acceptable and definitely still losing weight. That being said, when I tell anyone I weigh 270 they're shocked. Most guess I weigh closer to 240. I'm 6'3" tall, very broad shoulders, and a 28" long torso, so it's fairly distributed. Also, I'm 21.

    Right now I sit in a room with 4 other people, it's 11:30 at night, and I'm sitting right smack dab in the middle of London. There are 2 other guys and 2 other girls, but one girl and guy are dating and the other guy and girl are nothing more than friends. The girl is incredibly attractive, but I know she wouldn't even consider a thought of anything relationship-wise with me.

    This is my 3rd time studying abroad, past two times were in the Netherlands. Each time I've met a vast variety of people and been in many situations that make me feel like I've learned and gained a lot of knowledge about myself and humanity in general. This is going to sound cocky and it probably is cocky to say, but I do feel like I'm pretty well traveled and culturally experienced.

    I've only ever had one girlfriend, and that was for 3 weeks in high school. The relationship wouldn't have worked and it was best that it ended. Since then I haven't even been on a date. By that I mean I've kind tried to broach the subject, but it's hard for me to find a girl I'd even be interested in.

    Is it too much to ask to want a girlfriend that's more than your typical sorority girl and has global interests? I'm a libertarian so that makes most girls who are interested in global affairs at odds with me. I find it hard to meet a girl who I know would be committed to me, but at the same time isn't dull.

    Cliffs: I feel like I can't find a girl that meshes with me basically and despite traveling vastly and seeing all sorts of cultures...I've still yet to meet one. Do I fail?
     
  2. arseclown

    arseclown Guest

    you may have your standards too high or just looking at the wrong type of girls and getting pissed that none of them are interesting or interested in you.
     
  3. Kirbys Autumn

    Kirbys Autumn Mrs. Kirby McSpic

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    . Maybe you're just not looking in the right places? Or maybe you're trying too hard. Just relax and go out. You'll meet someone.
     
  4. CodeX

    CodeX Guest

    If you weigh 270 pounds expect a 270 pound girlfriend.
     
  5. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Care,for all is like a bonsai tree
    In the on-topic section there's a thread about "do you look down on obese people?" 80% of the people is indeed disgusted by obesity and fat, not only do most people think it looks disgusting, but from my point of view its unhealthy too.

    An obese person in that thread replied: i think its shallow that if you don't accept me when im 260 , but do accept me when im 130 , im still the same person.

    And i have to agree its very shallow, but at the same time unfortunatly i have to admit that looks DO matter in this world, so without further delay my advice would be to run towards the horizon and keep running until you have lost each inch of fat , go see a dietist and only get healthy food inside of your house, no more eating of garbage, and a regular schedule on working out. Its not nice advice, but it is honest in terms of increasing your chances on establishing a relationship.
     
  6. PunkInDrublic

    PunkInDrublic Active Member

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    Unfortunately, it matters. Even other overweight people have unrealistic standards about the size/looks of the people date because they feel they should be accepted the same. This sort of means that it's harder for even two overweight people to accept each other.

    It's probably a hard road and I can't possibly imagine it as I've never been in the same boat, but continue trying to lose weight. Not only will you look better, you'll probably gain a LOT of self-confidence as you do, which is something a lot of other people (like myself) DO have a huge problem with.

    Good luck man. I hope I wasn't being too harsh.
     

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