SRS i wish my mother was dead...

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by StayLRG, Dec 28, 2007.

  1. StayLRG

    StayLRG New Member

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    or had cancer or aids right now. this is what would make me happy. i'm sick of her treating me like i'm nothing.
     
  2. Yuppy

    Yuppy Have a seat right there....

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    no you dont. what did she do?
     
  3. StayLRG

    StayLRG New Member

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    constantly telling me how pathetic i am and how shitty my life is no matter what i do to change it (ie going to career counseling where they are helping me get a job for free due to my disability). no matter how i try to better myself, she wants to knock me back down to a level where i feel as i am nothing. she actually told me that even tho the state is paying for me to get help finding a decent career, it would be worth it to risk that help by taking a job that pays 6.50 an hr and wouldn't even be full time. i'm sick of her making me feel like i'm nothing.
     
  4. 2500

    2500 Guest

    so prove her wrong. wishing death on someone won't fix anything. it'll make matters worse. how old r u? chances are, old enough to make something of yourself. proving your mom wrong and becoming someone dispite what she says will effect more worse than aids will. she was probably raised in a dysfunctional environment, and she feels the only way to motivate you is to make you feel like shit. its obviously not the right way, but thats prolly all your mom knows. just, ignore her, and make something of yourself. you don't need mommys approval to be somebody. be your own person, as hard as that might be.
     
  5. StayLRG

    StayLRG New Member

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    the thing is, i'm not on disability. i have no income except side work. it pays the bills, but i need a legit job. i don't want to be scraping by. i'm working with the department of rehab services because i have bipolar disorder and took a break from school, and then when i went to go back my parents pretty much said no so now i'm doing nothing. they actually told me they would rather me work at mcdonalds then take the time looking for a serious job that has benefits as well as advancement opportunities. all my life i've been compared to her friends kids, and i'm fucking sick of it. that shit kills me inside. you all probably saw my posts about my social skills stuff maybe. i asked for recommendations on ways to improve those, and i read one book and have been doing great with talking to people. i feel a lot more confident. but no, i get knocked back down by her. i'm sick of it.
     
  6. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    How old are you?
     
  7. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Ya know...it really sucks when the ones that are supposed to love and protect us turn out to be the enemy.

    You are not alone in this regard. Others know exactly what it's like.

    My suggestion is to start finding ways to limit your contact with her and increase your contact with others that support you. Not financially but emotionally. You often can find these at church but not always....you may need to visit some free support groups.

    Your mother doesn't need to die, get aids or anything like that for you to overcome this shit. Don't focus on your mom and what needs to change in her....instead focus on yourself and what you can do to continue to improve. If you are older than 18, you don't need her permission to do anything so take care of you first.
     
  8. StayLRG

    StayLRG New Member

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    23. since i just left school my rents were paying my apartment and i want to be taking that over. that's why i can't just say fuck off, i need a job first. i hate the fact that i don't pay every single one of my bills. until i'm doing that i'm not going to be happy, which really sucks.
     
  9. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Your happiness is not dependent on you paying all your bills. Sure that's a goal to strive for but you can be happy along the way, if you'll allow yourself to be happy.
     
  10. Yuppy

    Yuppy Have a seat right there....

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    You have to remember that you are the only one who can do it for yourself. You have to actually do it. Posting on OT should not be on the list of shit you are doing. You should be applying for jobs and going for interviews. Or going back to school.

    Stabilize yourself first then maybe return to school?

    Being 23 and living off your parents and being mad about sucks. Im 23 and live @ home. Im just saving so I can move out of state. But Im not mad.

    You and your parents should come to an understanding. Meaning when she says something you say ok, or yes mother. Then you do it when you feel like it.
     
  11. StayLRG

    StayLRG New Member

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    the problem is my parents keep threatening to stop helping me over anything. it's their way of controlling me. all i ever hear about is "well just stop paying this and you'll be on the streets". i'm sick of that shit. i'm sick of being scared about whether or not i will have a place to live. they wonder why i had such a bad drug problem for a few months after dropping out of school. i can't deal with this shit anymore. without being self sufficient my life is hell.
     
  12. Yuppy

    Yuppy Have a seat right there....

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    I may be missing something but bipolar does not mean you can't work last i checked.... do you have another physical disability too?

    Why not get out from under their thumb and start working somewhere. Check classifieds. craiglists. careerbuilder.com etc. call them, ask for an interview, get an interview, call them a couple days later after the interview and speak to whoever you interviewed with.

    On a side note.

    Ever tried smiling for no reason? sounds gay right? just walk around for a day intentionally smiling like a fag. I'm dead serious. At the end of the day. You wont be able to tell me you don't feel better about life. I am 100% dead serious here. If you just smile all day long for no reason your brain might trick you into being happy med-free.

    It might be a temporary fix. I always feel better when I smile.
     
  13. ridah626

    ridah626 OT Supporter

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    you should use that negative energy and use it as motivation. ive had people put me down in the past and now i have shut them up. nobody thought i would be where i am at today.
     

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