I went up to a girl. What did I do wrong?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by PureEnergy, Jul 11, 2008.

  1. PureEnergy

    PureEnergy New Member

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    I try to get this girl's number, but failed.
    So on my way to work we were on the train, we got off at the same stop then I decided to walk up to her and ask "Can I speak to you for a moment?" I spoke in a calm manner and she gives this WTF attitude and said "I'm late." Then she walked very fast away from me. I didn't bother to chase after her.

    We're in a busy area, so I'm wondering what did I do wrong? Oh btw I dunno if race matter, but she's asian. The girls that rejected me before never gave a WTF attitude.
     
  2. knucks

    knucks Active Member

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    Was "Can I speak to you for a moment" your first and only line to her? That's pretty ugh...:ugh:
     
  3. mooses

    mooses OT Supporter

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    She probably thought you were some sort of salesman or something. I think your approach scared her off.
     
  4. enigmatic

    enigmatic Guest

    dot.
     
  5. knucks

    knucks Active Member

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    This is where you fucked up.
     
  6. jmezz

    jmezz layin in bed stretchin my pumped quads for hours

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    Asking a question puts the power in her hands.
     
  7. BigBronco

    BigBronco OT Supporter

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    A quick compliment and a smile can go a long way in a large public spot like a subway/transit station.
     
  8. Leah

    Leah OT Supporter

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    :werd: If she responds to that then you could initiate more conversation, it's kinda weird to just ask to speak to her when you're only plan is to ask for her number. :mamoru:
     
  9. PureEnergy

    PureEnergy New Member

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    Yea that was my only line and she ran off. I thought it was best not to keep going after her.

    I know that now. what is a decent approach in a public area?

    I know that now. So basically any girl would of reacted the same way? What is a better approach?

    I did not know what else to say. In in terms of trying to get a girls phone# don't all conversation start with a question?


    I tried that before and the results were in the same. Besides isn't complimenting a girl puts the power in her hands as well?
     
  10. knucks

    knucks Active Member

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    I think a "Hi" goes miles beyond what you tried.

    Besides, the timing just was not right.
     
  11. BigBronco

    BigBronco OT Supporter

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    Well first off I know it has to be tougher to try and catch a girl on the subway prior to work. At that time, the person usually has a lot going on in their head about what the day holds, among many other items. (Most people usually do not talk/want to make a conversation)

    If I was in your shoes, I would not expect to get somewhere early in the morning, but giving a compliment or even making eye contact and saying hi can open up a door and start something.

    Now, on your commute home, it may be a completely different story. It is friday you know. I by no means am the player of the world but as stated, saying "Hi" can get you really far. As much as you want to hold control of a conversation, you need to let the opposing person play a role in it all as well.
     
  12. uwofrost

    uwofrost New Denver Crew

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    First off did she look at you and smile before you made the approch? I never approch any female that doesnt give me a smile or something of that nature first... and as many other have said saying "hi" or "Hello" works well.
     
  13. Vysion

    Vysion New Member

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    You didn't do anything wrong.

    She was probably in a hurry and she wasn't interested in meeting someone new.

    Sometimes when you got shit to do, that is all your mind is thinking about.

    Striking up conversations with women in busy places like a subway isn't the best place for it, unless you are both waiting for the same train, or sitting next to each other on the train ride.

    Don't be down on yourself though. Just learn from your mistake and enhance yourself. Never use that line again -- "Can I speak to you for a moment?" That is something a boss says to an employee and whenever my boss says that to me I get nervous.
     
  14. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    That opening would creep me out too. Not to mention she had never even seen or looked at you and it was after getting off a train. I might think you were about to mug me.
     
  15. PureEnergy

    PureEnergy New Member

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    After saying hi, how would I initiate the conversation afterwards? Usually I start conversation with a question, but I guess its a wrong approach?


    Well it wasn't that early in the morning, it was around 11am. Usually I see more girls in the morning on the subway. In the afternoon when I take my lunch break during the time between 12-3pm I see lots of girls walking outside. Would it be a better time to approach some of them?


    While we were on the train I wasn't really paying attention to anybody. I notice her when we were both getting off at the same stop. I was behind her when we were walking then I slowly tap her to make the approach. Besides I wouldn't have approach her while we were riding the train. I would of waited till we get off, which I did originally.


    Usually on the train is when I see lots of girls that look nice. More than going to a club. What is a better line to say?


    I didn't really notice her while we were on the train, when we got off together is when I notice her. After thinking about it she did look like she was gonna take out a weapon from her purse. Any suggestions?



    I believe she was late going somewhere, but I think she would have given her # to someone else if the approach was right. Any other suggestion that I can make it successful next time?
     
  16. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    "Can I speak to you for a moment?" sounds formal/professional. Not at all the impression you want to convey. Also, like others have said, probably a bad time to try...early morning on the subway, she's probably heading to work.

    Try catching her AFTER work.
     
  17. J-Ace24

    J-Ace24 double down.

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    Didn't you watch the pickup artist show? No success in starting a conversation by running up to someone unexpectedly. You need to catch their attention first.
     
  18. Vysion

    Vysion New Member

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    A question isn't bad. Asking for permission is bad. Never say things like "Can I ask you a question?" Just ask the damn question. Asking for permission gives up power immediately.

    Say "Hi, I like your shoes, coat, scarf, etc.", or "I noticed you work for so-and-so, do you like working there?"

    Never start out by asking for a number, or a date, or contact info, or anything personal. You need to get her conversing with you to get to know you for a short while. Then you can use a time constraint and say "I have to run, but I'd like to continue this conversation another time, do you have an email address (or phone number)". Email addresses are easier to get than phone numbers. Or if it is near the end of the day, say "Hey I am going to stop at the coffee shop around the corner, would you like to get a coffee or a tea with me?" If she says no straight out then say good bye and leave, but if she says "I don't know...", say something like, "Just for 15 minutes then I have to leave. It'll be a quick yet fun conversation."
     
  19. djshotglass

    djshotglass New Member

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    This is right on par with "Can I ask you a question?" :rofl:

    you're already speaking to her silly
     
  20. djshotglass

    djshotglass New Member

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    If I read this correctly, this is why she was about to take a weapon out of her purse:

     
  21. JordanClarkson

    JordanClarkson OT Supporter

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    even though it wasn't a good opening, you shouldn't have given up. in that situation any approach is likely to fail. you should expect rejection and have a thought out answer to it. for example you could run out in front of her and ask for one minute, just 60 seconds of her time. if she still says no, offer her $20. then just chat. at the end when she has to go and wants the $20 tell her you'll treat her to lunch and she can have anything she wants for up to $20. :big grin:
     
  22. RebootEnzo

    RebootEnzo New Member

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    Why would you ask permission to speak to someone?
     
  23. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    her Knight in Shining Armor doesn't need her permission to address her

    you communicated desperation and neediness
     
  24. coldstone

    coldstone New Member

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    If somebody said that to me, I'd be like NO I DON'T HAVE CHANGE.
     
  25. NCS

    NCS Active Member

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    i'm not reading the responses. i'm sure someone said this but dont ask for permission, take it. if you had a question like "where did you get those sunglasses, they're cool", then you should have just opened with that.

    the other mistake you made is you noticed her, she noticed that you noticed her, and you waited to approach. its creepy.
     

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