SRS I was just chillin in the car, listening to the radio, and realized that I'm dead

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by black jesus, Oct 14, 2009.

  1. black jesus

    black jesus OT Supporter

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    I was listening to "Tiny Dancer" and realized that I don't care about anyone in my family or otherwise. My friends are now getting married, I'm not pursuing women, I don't have much emotion for a social life so I basically working, lifting, going to bars alone and speaking to no one, and now live to put my toy car on the racetrack.

    Motorsports has pretty much replaced sex for me. No friends, no family, no caring for much of anything aside from getting on the track.

    What do I do now?
     
  2. Lazy D.

    Lazy D. Active Member

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    come up with a goal and pursuit it. Be it getting sex, learning a new language, travelling to new cities/countries, finding a new job. You'll meet new people along the way.
     
  3. black jesus

    black jesus OT Supporter

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    Am I forced to make it something other than going to the track? If so, I don't know that it interests me.


    What is the point in having a GF aside from regular sex with one person?
     
  4. CustomTrendzInc

    CustomTrendzInc New Member

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    Having a girlfriend is not such a bad thing. If you find the right one she could go to the races with you and enjoy seeing you have fun. You could spend time with her doing shit like going out, watching a movie, relaxing, anything you want.
     
  5. Lazy D.

    Lazy D. Active Member

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    you don't see women as anything other than sex ?
     
  6. black jesus

    black jesus OT Supporter

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    Yeah, what's the point or the "utility" I'm supposed to get from a GF?

    I've "cared" before but I don't know that I'm capable of that anymore. Its like motorsports has replaced my desire for women...and I think its a lot better. However, I'm 28-years old and been single since I was 20, so I'm a little concerned.

    I tried diligently for about 9-months to pick up every woman I saw, but it made me sick to see how crude people can be.
     
  7. James Deanely

    James Deanely Active Member

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    The silver lining is that you dont know how good you have it. Think about it... you have the freedom to do pretty much whatever you want be it racing, bars, traveling the world tomorrow, etc. Nothing to really hold you back, dont have to factor in another person's opinion or feelings on anything you do. Been there done that bro - I was once in your shoes then surrended to peer pressure from family/friends and now I regret every single minute of it.
     
  8. black jesus

    black jesus OT Supporter

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    Yeah, I realize this and celebrate every minute of it. About 4-years ago I was living out of my car, sofa surfing for about 4-months. I had no job, no cash, no toys, and was a really, sad and angry person. Today, oh shit I have a great job, a grip in savings, I've lived all over the nation, and have a literal "dream car" in the garage and enough skill that together we can beat-up on Ferraris, Vettes, and Porsches at the track. My life is golden and unfair in comparison to the small amount of strife I've lived through.

    However I worry that I'll look back on these years and feel like I missed something when I'm 40 because I spend too much time alone/solitude.
     
  9. James Deanely

    James Deanely Active Member

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    As long as you are happy thats all that really matters. Whos to say that you wont meet someone in the future?
     
  10. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    If you're not happy in a current situation then get out of it.
     
  11. MissKitty

    MissKitty If squats were easy they'd be called 'Your Mum' OT Supporter

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    If you have no desire to be with a woman and you like your cars, why do you need to change?
     
  12. GregFarz78

    GregFarz78 New Member

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    Are you just trying to fit in with society's definition of a normal life...marriage, kids, house, etc? That life isn't for everyone, are you having fun now? sounds like it then I wouldn't worry about anything. Who says you can't/won't find someone in your 40s or whenever?
     
  13. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

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    You care about something, therefore you're not dead yet.
     
  14. OniMinion

    OniMinion ...recalls when this forum was actually about cars OT Supporter

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    It amazes me how social we are. What alludes me is how many people don't realize this until they are so far removed.

    I'm willing to bet OT helps you feel socialized. Try to hang with some of them, there are a ton in Texas, Houston especially. Also, find people, friends, family that you jive with. You need to have physical contact with people you enjoy to truly live. I pulled the same shit you are doing right now about 9 years ago. Now I am rich with friendships, and have never been happier. You need to be proactive though.
     
  15. James Deanely

    James Deanely Active Member

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    extremely hard to do when you've got kids..... no matter what I lose. enough said
     
  16. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Care,for all is like a bonsai tree
    The meaning of life is to help and love other people , this is the only thing that fills up the black hole in your soul, so whatever you do for work, make sure it involves helping other people, and on the way take good care of yourself too.
     
  17. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    Still man...you're unhappy and putting up a fake face...Do you think your kids would want that? I think if handled the right way, your kids will be fine in the end.
     
  18. Genghis.Tron

    Genghis.Tron New Member

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    Dude, you need therapy. Go at least to support groups or group therapy which you don't have to pay for, especially if there's a psychologist supervising this.
     
  19. Genghis.Tron

    Genghis.Tron New Member

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    See a psychiatrist or psychologist for an evaluation if you don't know where to go. One to four sessions and you'd have an idea where to go to.
     
  20. black jesus

    black jesus OT Supporter

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    I don't really care to spend a few years in a doctor's office so they can tell me that my mom is a narcissist and that my dad is trash.
     
  21. Genghis.Tron

    Genghis.Tron New Member

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    You seem to think that you'll be sitting in the office while he tells you why you are this way. That's not how it works especially if you see a good psychologist.

    Support group could be a nice way to see some people and see that you're not alone to suffer.

    Anyway, I suggested things to do (get an evaluation with a psychiatrist or psychologist, ask their advice on what to do next, ask for suggestions on where to go for group therapy or support groups if you prefer this way instead of alone in an office, and then act).

    You seem unhappy yet you prefer to reject my suggestion before trying it. Maybe it's an example of how you can keep yourself miserable instead of trying. If you want to do better, go out and try something, try anything, try everything until something works. Being miserable is not something you should accept.
     
  22. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

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    I would think expressing those exact feelings the moment you walk in the door would be in your best interest, that way you don't waste their time, and they yours. It may (or may not) uncover some answers to see someone who is experienced. I would think it's better than experiencing the same uncomfortable experiences you've had during your life.
     
  23. blackbirdbeatle

    blackbirdbeatle New Member

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    Is it wrong that as I read your thread title the music to Fresh Prince came up in my head?

    Also get help from a professional. CBT. I've already recommended it to another person in the last day but it's short duration (Probably only a few months at most). Or read the book that I gave to the other guy: http://www.amazon.com/Feeling-Good-Handbook-David-Burns/dp/0452281326

    I shit you not, this book is life changing for someone like you if you do everything exactly like he says.
     
  24. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Last edited: Oct 21, 2009
  25. black jesus

    black jesus OT Supporter

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    because I spent 5-years spending tons of cash on psychology and it got me here. Why burn another $200 per month on this shit. I don't understand why the answer has to be giving a major portion of my disposable income to a doctor so he can listen to me bitch about my life which is actually wonderful in comparison to people with real problems so they can once again tell me that my mother was crazy narcissist, i lived through 11-marriages as a child, and that I'm a winner and people like me.

    I understand, get the fuck over it and or stfu up about it if nothing is going to change. Sorry to bother you guys again.
     
    Last edited: Oct 23, 2009

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