SRS I want my ex back after almost a year

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by American SuperBeast, Mar 10, 2007.

  1. American SuperBeast

    American SuperBeast New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2006
    Messages:
    644
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Lehigh Valley, Pennsylvania
    Basically i have been single for the past year and before that i was going out with this girl for a couple months and then out of nowhere she broke up with me with no explanation of anything. Then 3 months later she contacts me and we start talking a little mainly on AIM and then once again out of nowhere just stops entirely. I have only had one other gf in that time and i still couldnt stop thinking about the the first one. I still can't whenever i have nothing to do and nothing else to think about she always comes to mine. Is this just an obsession or what.
     
  2. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2002
    Messages:
    10,498
    Likes Received:
    3
    Location:
    Care,for all is like a bonsai tree
    Its not obsession, its like someone in your room constantly turning the lights on and off while your making homework, it would drive you crazy. And same counts for her for starting and stopping the relationship, it means she simply doesn't know what she wants. She probably has an urge to be together, but doesn't want to be comitted and lose her freedom that she loves, or it could mean that your a rebound guy who she finds support with every time her normal relationships with other guys go down the drain. In any case she doesn't sound the type who can bring stability in a long term relationship.

    Emotional ties are like glue, and if you really love her its only normal that you keep thinking about her. But sometimes you have to put off that blindfold of love and be realistic, where is this all heading to? The answer = nowhere.

    So if i where you id focus my arrows on someone else who is able to bring the stability in your life during a long term relationship. You know you still love her, but love has got to go both ways, if she turns away from you and your relationship comes to a dead end road, the only thing you can do is to turn around your car, and head back to the highway of life , searching for another path in your life, maby with someone else who you love.
     
  3. American SuperBeast

    American SuperBeast New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2006
    Messages:
    644
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Lehigh Valley, Pennsylvania
    thanks for advice its just ive tryed that to let go or as you said turn the car around but it kinda just turns back on its own
     
  4. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 23, 2006
    Messages:
    65,506
    Likes Received:
    1
    Being "in love" has a very similiar effect on the brain to an addiction to a hard drug. There is craving (missing her). There is reward when you get a fix (like laying in bed with her just being completely content yet doing nothing). There is withdrawl (what you're experiencing now). Why do you think some people take being dumped so hard? Imagine telling a coke addict that "oops, there's no more coke and you're never going to get any ever again." Well, when you're in love with (read: chemically addicted to) a girl, and she tells you "I'm dumping you" (you've never going to get your fix of me again (I'm not talking sex here)), it can have the same effect.

    So what am I saying? It's totally normal. And it might make you feel .01% better now that you know why you are feeling like this.

    btw, first loves are always the hardest to get over. <--- that's a link. I don't know why hyperlinks don't change colors sometimes on this forum. I wonder how many links I've missed because I didn't see them and didn't know they were links.
     
  5. American SuperBeast

    American SuperBeast New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2006
    Messages:
    644
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Lehigh Valley, Pennsylvania
    I can say that did kinda make me feel slightly better but i never would have thought this "withdrawl" would still last so long because i want to move on but i cant
     
  6. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 23, 2006
    Messages:
    65,506
    Likes Received:
    1
    Ok, this isn't healthy, but sometimes people replace one addiction with another. As long as the replacement addiction is better for you, it can be an improvement. Some people give up smoking and go crazy working out. I hear a good fix for a broken heart is playing World of Warcraft :big grin: I'm serious tho (I've never played it, but people get addicted to this game like nothing else. There are support groups for divorced wives whose husbands chose that game over them). That is powerful stuff. Besides. If you have to quit WoW, you might be bored, but it beats having a broken heart.
     
  7. BradUF

    BradUF Guest

    You will get addicted to World of Warcraft... You will forget about all girls.
     

Share This Page