SRS I think there's something wrong in my head...

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by bitetobreakskinn, Sep 21, 2005.

  1. bitetobreakskinn

    bitetobreakskinn Blinky the Christmas Ghost

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    Anytime that I make plans to hang out with a girl that I have a real interest in, I have the worst anxiety attacks when it gets close to the time to meet her.

    For instance, tonight (at 3:45pm), I'm meeting this girl that I like from work, to go to the mall, and to go play mini golf. At the moment, I'm debating telling her that my dad wants me to stop by his house for dinner, so I can't hang out with her for too long.

    When I made the plans with her, I felt fine, last night at work when we discussed it, I felt fine, today when she texted me at like noon, I felt fine, but right now I feel like I'm ready to throw up.

    I'm 22 years old, I've been in short relationships, I've been in long relationship, and this shit shouldn't be happening to me.

    Anyone know what I can do to calm down, or get over this, etc? :sadwavey:
     
  2. beanolo

    beanolo It does a body good!!!1

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    Just a nervous feeling such as butterflies? :)
     
  3. reverse

    reverse hooooooooo

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    No, he feels like he's about to throw up.
     
  4. jshively

    jshively OT Supporter

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    We all have feelings like that. Heck even pro football players may puke before a game because of nervousness. I always have this paranoid fear that the girl is not going to be there or she is going to call and cancel. It has only happened once in the 28 years I have been alive but it is still a fear of mine.

    Just relax and realize this girl has already agreed to go out with you which means she is interested in you. Be yourself and everything will be fine.

    Good trick on the way to meet her shut off the radio, and take deep breaths in and out, visualize how the evening is going to go and make sure it is positive visualization, sit back, and relax. About 30 minutes into the date you will be laughing to yourself because you realize you have nothing to worry about.
     
  5. Vay

    Vay New Member

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    Well I think this has to be one of the best posts I have read in a while! We all get like this even the guys/girls who think they are all that. Thing is the hard part is over you already asked her. Now this is the easy part (for my at least).

    Go have fun and remember to relax and have fun!
     
  6. bitetobreakskinn

    bitetobreakskinn Blinky the Christmas Ghost

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    Ok, so driving to her house, I was nervous, but not real bad, and then when I got to her house and she was about to get into the car, I got the "puking" feeling again. We went to the mall (the original plan), I had her show me where her school was (she wants me to meet her for lunch sometime), and then I took her home after about 2-3 hours of hanging out. She seemed dissapointed, but I didn't know what else to do cause I was scared/nervous.

    I think I get so worked up because I'm so "into" her, but I don't know what I can do, because she deserves better then me being too scared to hang out with her when I see her.
     
  7. Vay

    Vay New Member

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    Tell her you where not feeling to good that day or something. If she really likes you she would give you a second chance ;).



     
  8. bitetobreakskinn

    bitetobreakskinn Blinky the Christmas Ghost

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    I just don't know if I want to bring up toher what I'm going through, because that's a lot to lay on a "potential" girlfriend. :hs:
     
  9. PuppyCat

    PuppyCat O.T. Mom

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    So, this girl knows you from work...I don't think that you are at the level where you can say "Hey, when I date you I get newvous and want to chunk." (not quite in those terms)...I'd wait awhile before I mentioned that and would "ease" into it over a series of dates when I felt comfortable enough and trusted this person enough and connected with them enough to know that they would understand.

    Feeling anxious to the point of wanting to vomit before a dat is normal for some...butterflies are normal for others...everyone is different. I think though you should relax and do the breathing exercises as prescribed above. Self-talk is also effective at times...just say to yourself "OK i had a date with this girl before, nothing bad happened, it was okay...this time will be okay as well, maybe even better." Be positive. Be yourself, remember your manners, and put on your biggest smile.

    You never know, the girl might be nervous as well...and as Vay says "Just have Fun!"
     
    Last edited: Sep 22, 2005
  10. jshively

    jshively OT Supporter

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    You are making it harder than it needs to be. Instead of looking at her as a potential girlfriend look at her as a friend. Not saying you want to end up in the dreaded friend zone but quit putting so much pressure to do everything correct on yourself and just look at her as another one of your friends. Believe me you will screw up and guess what she is going to screw up also no one is perfect.

    There are no hard fast rules of dating just relax and have fun with it. You should be enjoying the time you spend together not dreading them.
     
  11. Vay

    Vay New Member

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    See that is where people mess up is if they to put much pressure on them selfs or on their date. No one is perfect so just let me your self. You want her to like who you are and not someone who you are not. I have learn after months of going through changes. I am a new person but in the same body, and I am loving every second of it.
     

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