SRS I think my bestfriend isn't my bestfriend anymore. It Sucks

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by RollinDollos, Oct 11, 2008.

  1. RollinDollos

    RollinDollos Guest

    Ive actually came to realize though that my best friend isn't about to do shit in life because hes smoking his life away, I understand some people smoke weed but he can't handle his hes just unmotivated and act like nothing matters when he hasn't even talked to any other girls other then this semi-fat girl whom he tries to keep a secret, when I know that he could do way better if he just cleaned him self up. At the same time while I type this its like I contradict myself sometimes because I feel him bringing me down with him. I feel as if I never met him and we went our separate ways that I'd be way better off without him. At the same time its like I don't want to alienate my self from him because hes been my boy since 6th grade and I think another reason is because ever since I was a kid I've had a best friend so I think I attach myself to close to people.

    He doesn't even have a job yet and sits around smoking weed all day, here I am living at my own place on my own hard earned dollar and he is out getting busted by his parents the third time for selling weed.

    The more I think about it the more this dude is just dead weight to me is bringing me way down. A part of me wants to help him out and sit down and talk but its like talking to a one of those dolls with a string attached and when u pull it, it says the same thing over and over again. Ive been bummed out all day and I think this is the reason why and i think its primarily because if I can't help my own best friend how am I going to help myself? I just can't think of anything to say to him and when I do see him and think I have something to say I don't say it because it just goes straight to the joking that made us best friends in the first place. Its like a monkey on my back.

    At the same time i partially blame my self for this because I go into depression states for no reason at all and I'm beginning to believe that its because of this situation. I have basically no fun doing anything anymore, I just kind of do it because I have to. Sometimes I get so nervous about going to public places that its actually extremely unenjoyable to be there (This makes no sense because I am a DJ and I perform in front of crowds of beautiful women). For instants at the gym, ill go around talking to all my friends at the gym becasue I'll be happy and other times when I feel down its my worse fear to bump into my own friends and have a simple conversation becasue I feel like I'm not myself and that im going to let them down on my personality.

    I've also come to realize lately that I simply am scared to open up to people and find it very hard to talk about my feelings to anyone including my parents and its been that way for a while. As of now I feel super lonely and I feel though as I put on a front of my actual self, sometimes it feels like the things I do are simply based on others expectations. I honestly am just typing what ever I think because im in such a mind fuck right now. I'm not the type of person at all to open up to a message board or to anyone. I'm sitting at home on a fucking friday night beause I told my self I need to study for a career making oportunity but I havent studied all day because I can't even fucking concentrate. I'm sick and tired of being bottled up, I think i need to see a fucking shrink.

    It doesn't even feel good to get all that off of my chest I just feel pathetic now.

    I'm a DJ
    I make way more then I should at my age
    Not bad looking.
    This fucking sucks right now, I wish it would just go away so I could be happy and make some more and new friends or something, I can't even make any more new friends because I feel like this. Its like I completely forgot how to properly communicate with people.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 11, 2008
  2. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2002
    Messages:
    10,498
    Likes Received:
    3
    Location:
    Care,for all is like a bonsai tree
    For me i would just put on an ultimatum, either he stops smoking weed, or you stop being his friend. You know i basically had to make the same decision, i've cut out a bunch of people who were doing drugs. And as long as you get friends to replace him you'll see that although he was your buddy since the beginning, in reality he's just another human being. Its like a toilet, you ony want to use the toilet in your home because that's the only toilet you trust, but once you'll see there's other toilets out there in that world who work just as well or even better then the one you have at home, you'll see how you've only been denying yourself a better life with better friends.

    You don't owe him anything. I would actively give it one month to try everything in your power to get him stop with his addiction, if that doesn't help then after that id try to get along with other people.
     
  3. uneek

    uneek OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 14, 2003
    Messages:
    12,002
    Likes Received:
    0
    I don't think an ultimatum will work in this situation. I don't know what will.
     
  4. Redbeard

    Redbeard OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 16, 2007
    Messages:
    12,791
    Likes Received:
    20
    Location:
    Nowhere
    So you are going to leave your best friend that is having the same problems you are having?
     
  5. Ameter

    Ameter Active Member

    Joined:
    Mar 31, 2005
    Messages:
    97,795
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Calgary, AB
    funny thing about growing up: you don't have as much time to spend with friends

    you don't need to tell him you're not going to be his friend anymore, just be 'busy' for a while, until you've cleaned yourself up and seen what it's like when you aren't constantly hanging out with him

    hell, if you turn out to be wildly successful, it may inspire him to get off his ass and do shit
     

Share This Page