SRS I think it might be over

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by vitamin dew, May 31, 2006.

  1. vitamin dew

    vitamin dew New Member

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    Ok, so I told my girlfriend of almost 6 months I was going skating with a friend, she texted me back and said, "We need to talk when I get home" I asked her when she would be home, and said she doesnt know. My heart immediately sank, as those words arent usually good. I asked her if we could talk about it now and she said, "would you rather me rush through it now or talk through it later"

    :wtc:
     
  2. Xin

    Xin OT Supporter

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    Don't let it get ya down buddy. There's plenty of girls out there, if she leaves ya just say 'ok that's cool, thanks for the good memories' and walk out. Don't be desperate/clingy and don't be completely uncaring and assholish either. Get your closure and walk out that door. After you've taken your space from her, shoot her a message asking what's up and how she's been and begin that friendship, or just keep on not talkin' to her if ex's being friends isn't your thing.

    Just look at it like this A) You're meant to be, just not at this time, you'll be back again someday after you've both matured or B) You'll meet someone miles better in the future.
     
  3. vitamin dew

    vitamin dew New Member

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    Im hoping it'll atleast be something we can talk through and still be together:hs:
     
  4. johan

    johan Active Member

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    A gentle talk is a good idea to iron out misunderstandings.

    But it rarely works out in the long run, to "convince" them of something against their heart's true desire.
    If they really wish to leave, let them go with love, and kindness, and class and DIGNITY.

    If they want to come back...they will. They won't forget you.
     
  5. Cthalupa

    Cthalupa New Member

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    Doesn't necissarily mean it's over - The talk could have to do with a lot of things, not all of them bad.

    Not to say you should get your hopes up, either - But don't automatically assume the worst. It might be, it might not be, but you won't know until you actually talk.


    It's going to come, whether you worry about it or not. In the mean time, don't let it get to you.
     
  6. vitamin dew

    vitamin dew New Member

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    Yeah, i've just been waiting. For the most part, i've gotten the whole, she said it its over, idea out of my head and am giving myself some thought for the better. Theres a few things I can think of it being about, other then breaking up, so that helps.
     
  7. Ameter

    Ameter Active Member

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    She hasn't said its over. It's possible she just wants to discuss something else. A lot depends on tone.

    Perhaps you have a guilty conscience over going out with your friend?
     
  8. onslaught61

    onslaught61 OT Supporter

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    just play it out first and see what happens, dont jump to conclusions.
     
  9. vitamin dew

    vitamin dew New Member

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    It was my best friend(a guy):ugh: No guilty conscience lol
     
  10. vitamin dew

    vitamin dew New Member

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    I ended up going to smoke with some friends, told her about it first, she said she was still out with her parents and would call later. Got home around 10:30 and crashed. Just woke up, its about 3:30am she never tried calling. So maybe she wasnt going to break up with me?
     
  11. vitamin dew

    vitamin dew New Member

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    Also she hasnt changed things like myspace saying In a Relationship, or taking ilove Stephen out of her aim profile. How important is that kind stuff if she has decided its over for her to change it right away?
     
  12. MichaelJackson

    MichaelJackson New Member

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    I think the last thing on her mind would be to immediately adjust her relationship status on the net.
     
  13. MichaelJackson

    MichaelJackson New Member

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    Well said.
     
  14. johan

    johan Active Member

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    It means absolutely nothing. She MIGHT go on an 'erasing' spree if she really HATED you. But if she's just moving on...err, this is really not that important. It doesn't mean she's changed her mind.

    If anything, it simply means she's not being childish or immature.


    Also if you're scouring around hoping for ANY scrap of info, as you describe, err, wouldn't it be better to just talk to her? Why don't you call her up instead of pining away and waiting for her call.

    I think we all know what the call is likely to be, and hence your reluctance to initiate it. But closing your eyes won't make something go away. Just start talking.
     
  15. teo

    teo . => ? => !

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    Eh?
    The sooner you talk to her, the sooner you can get on with your life (with or without her).
     
  16. kristaliah

    kristaliah New Member

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    She really might not be breaking up with you though.. I used to send my boyfriend texts or call and leave messages saying that we needed to talk and the only reason behind it was that I was pissed hed left the dishes out and it was gross.

    But then again.. Since youre worrying so much, it doesnt sound good. Just let her leave though if that's what she wants. She'll come back to you if it was a mistake but you can't force someone to be with you and if she stays with you only to make you happy/comfortable, she'll be regretting it and will only build up frustration and resentment towards you. Good luck though. :hs:
     
  17. vitamin dew

    vitamin dew New Member

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    Ok so heres an update as of like 10 minutes ago. And a little more information from previous things. A few days ago she went for a job interview and we were going to hang out after, she didnt get out until late and then had stuff to do with family. I hadnt talked to her that entire night, or the next morning, thats when she finally responded with "we have to talk". So she finally valled me about 10 minutes ago, but says "Hey I got the job and today is my first day, I have to go ill ttyl bye." So she hung up and I thought a little bit and texted her saying "does what you want to talk about have anything to do with us breaking up?" Now I wonder if im wrong to have said that, as if im jumping to conclusions. But is it so wrong to have that thought in my mind?
     
  18. vitamin dew

    vitamin dew New Member

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    It's amazing how posting here can make me feel a bit better :hug:
     
  19. johan

    johan Active Member

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    Sounds like her mind is elsewhere.

    Might be due to the job, might be due to a planned breakup (but she doesn't have time to go thru the inevitable sobs), might be due to her being really busy, .... or it might be due to the fact she no longer cares.

    You don't call her much do you? Sounds like you let her be in the driver's seat most of the time.
     
  20. vitamin dew

    vitamin dew New Member

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    We call eachother plenty:dunno: I actually call her the most.
     
  21. vitamin dew

    vitamin dew New Member

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    She gets off work at 9 and is going to call me.
     
  22. vitamin dew

    vitamin dew New Member

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    Here are a few notes to think about.
    -She's 17 and her parents are both cops(and Cuban) they wont let her get her license yet.
    -Im 18, my mom works all the time and I rarely se my dad(divorced he lives 3 hours away)
    - Dad is coming on saturday to buy my car, I can get my license in a week.
    - She's going to sarasota on the 11th with family coming back the 22nd(they go every summer)

    Ok, so we just got done talking. She got off work and called me, started off as a bit of normal conversation and then I asked her what she wanted to talk about. She told me that shes tired of having to beg her mom to see me and when we do its usually just for a movie or something, we dont get to spend any real alone time together. She kept stressing that now she has a job, its her first job aswell...so im thinking this has something to do with it.
    She says she just needs time to think, were not broken up or on a break. She just wants to see how things go she doesnt know how she feels:squint: But she doesnt want to just throw away a 5 month relationship

    She's probably just under a lot of stress with having her first job and managing a boyfriend?
     
  23. Xin

    Xin OT Supporter

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    Looks like things are on the rocks, give her her space and be her friend until she makes up her mind. If you don't feel she's worth waiting for, cut her loose and move on. If it's right - she'll be back.
     
  24. vitamin dew

    vitamin dew New Member

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    I honestly feel she's worth waiting for, I couldnt imagine my life right now if I didnt have her support. Im going to give her room, to get used to things, having a job and all, and take it easy.
     
  25. Xin

    Xin OT Supporter

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    Good choice my friend, good luck.
     

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