SRS I think I'm turning into an alcoholic :wtc:

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Smiker89, Apr 9, 2008.

  1. Smiker89

    Smiker89 New Member

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    Ok I'll try give the briefest summary so bare with me please.

    I turned 18 last october, right in the middle of my final highschool exams and I started drinking alot more than I was before just because it was legal for me to do so. Normally I'd go out once a week for a quiet drink , and one big night would come around every 2-3 weeks or so. But now I go out 4-5 days of the week and get absolutely trashed without realising what the fuck i am doing.

    I'm studying at university right now and I dont have time for a job but i always seem to make time to go drink with my friends, ill get home on weeknights at 2-3am and wake up at 6 to go to school and on weekends ill get home around 5am and just sleep through a whole day because im comletely hung over.

    I always said to my self, "oh fuck it your young, just enjoy life and quit all this shit when you settle down etc" but now my own friends have started to jokingly call me an alcoholic and its kinda getting to me. Im stick thin but for some reason i can drink alot more than anyone i know and i guess im getting sick of waking up in the morning and forgetting what i did the previous night.

    I need some advice, I can't sit at home and just watch tv or screw around because i get a headache from the boredom and i think i only really enjoy my self when im on the piss. Am i abusing alcohol? please help me out here
     
  2. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Can you go out and not drink?
     
  3. Smiker89

    Smiker89 New Member

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    no, once i leave the house to go out ill be drinking. if i go out and stay sober then i feel depressed and sickly. and i wanted to know, is it normal to just have 2 or 3 beers at dinner and maybe 1 after a long day? i can understand people would want to say that this would be an example of using alcohol to cope with stress but in my family its just normal to casually drink alcohol at home.
     
  4. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Normal is a funny word. What's normal to me may not be normal for someone else so it's tough to say if you're engaging in high risk behavior.

    The fact that you've tried going out and feel depressed and sickly sounds very familiar. You might want to go to some open AA meetings and see if what they are saying rings true to you. If so, you might want to investigate it further.

    Here's some pamphlets that might help you figure it all out.
    http://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org/....cfm?PageID=15
    http://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org/....cfm?PageID=71
    http://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org/...gofromhere.pdf
     
  5. Smiker89

    Smiker89 New Member

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    I just have one more question before i check out AA meetings/groups. When do you stop having fun when your drinking, and when do you know that its a dependancy?

    i have no way of telling whether my behaviour is addictive or just because i enjoy drinking, or both. Sometimes ill drink and feel great, some times ill feel like shit but still drink because i thikn that will fix it.
     
  6. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    That's a hard question to answer. That's why I linked those pamphlets...they might help clarify it for you.

    Alcoholism is really goofy and it's the only disease that makes you believe you don't have it. I mean I knew shit was going badly in my life but I honestly thought it was something else besides my drinking. I thought it was the g/f, the job, my house, my car....whatever. I honestly didn't think that alcohol was my problem.

    I often said, "I'm not an alcoholic because I don't crave alcohol." That made perfect sense to most people and they couldn't argue with that. I even believed that shit. The reality is, I didn't crave alcohol because any time I wanted to drink, I drank. I never gave myself time to crave it. :)

    I sought help because my life just sucked and I was miserable. I didn't really want to quit drinking I just wanted all the other shit to stop. I stayed in AA because of what I heard in the meetings. I thought, "Holy shit....here's someone who's lived the hell I've lived and they found help. Hmm.....maybe I should stick around for a bit."
    Yep...I did the same.

    If you want additional info....be sure to read the threads here in R2R. There's a LOT of good info in this place.
     
  7. Smiker89

    Smiker89 New Member

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    thanks alot for helping me out with this, im going to search through the other threads and read up as much as i can, thinking about checking out an AA meeting this sunday hopefully that goes well.
     
  8. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    You're welcome.

    Keep in mind that simply learning about alcoholism and even going to meetings doesn't mark you for life as an alcoholic.

    The only requirement for membership in AA is a desire not to drink. It doesn't say how long that desire has to be there. You can have that desire for the hour that you're there. When they go around an introduce themselves, just say you first name only then say, "I have a desire not to drink" and noone you'll be fine. You don't have to admit to being an alcoholic.

    Anyways, if you have other questions later on, come on back here and post them. It's a process.
     
  9. MrJClive

    MrJClive OT Supporter

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    Your situation sounds an awful lot like mine when I was your age. It started off by me drinking with friends, and then the fact it was possible to feel that way whenever I wanted was brilliant. I'd drink right after school, sometimes during, and a few times before (fuck it, we're seniors! :hsugh:). I loved feeling better (seemingly) and thinking differently, on a different level than everyone else.

    As I entered college and had the ability to drink randomly with "normal" people, it made me believe I was normal as well. Things slowly got very bad in my life. Lost a girlfriend I truly loved, did shitty in school to the point it still amazes me I graduated, and got in countless debacles with my family, friends and work. It just kept getting worse and worse, until I tried to give up.

    I'm now 28 years old, have lost every good job I've ever had since college, been in and out of AA three times, and the problems I've caused myself due to alcohol have spiraled out of control. My life is a mess.

    I'm not writing this because I'm insinuating that you will turn out the same way. I just wanted to share with you the natural progression that alcohol and I have had over the years. Since you and I seemingly have that same behavior (at age 18) I think you should be aware of the fact that it does gets worse when you're alcoholic, and I hope you pay attention to some of the signs I just mentioned. I've lost a ton of good shit in my life, but I still am alive. And if there is one thing I have learned from my relapses and AA is that the things you lose actually slowly creep back if you work the program. That's an awesome feeling knowing you can always have it back if you want it, but you have to work for it. I just relapsed not too long ago, and cannot believe what I threw away. It totally sucks, but I'm happy that I've got options.

    /ramble
     
  10. maxlt1

    maxlt1 New Member

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    at least you're doing something about it early on in your life. :dunno:
     
  11. deusexaethera

    deusexaethera OT Supporter

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    A couple of thoughts:

    1. If you're drinking until you get a hangover, you're drinking too much and you're pushing your tolerance outward so you have to drink more before you feel it. That's why you can drink more than your friends can.

    2. Can you walk into a liquor store and walk out empty-handed? Try it tomorrow.

    EDIT: I lied, there's actually 3 thoughts:

    3. When you say you get bored when you don't drink, that sounds to me like you have a boring life overall and you're drinking to numb your brain so you don't notice. Maybe you should get a job, or a hobby that you actually can give a damn about. If you still drink instead of doing something meaningful, then I'd say you've got a problem.
     
  12. Smiker89

    Smiker89 New Member

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    It's really assuring to know that there are people here who can recognize exactly what I may be going through right now, and I'm glad you shared that with me because you've just given me another reason to try cut down and eventually give up drinking all together. I hope all goes well for you aswell, everyone in this subforum knows you can help yourself kick this habbit! :x:

    I think this really stood out for me because all I have going on in my life right now is full time study and then nothing. I study 5 days a week and then go enjoy my weekends with my friends , but its getting very repetitive and getting a hobby or a job might help me stay busy and not think about drinking too much. Thanks for your advice :drool:
     

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