SRS I need someone to talk to

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by metalfan111, Oct 4, 2006.

  1. metalfan111

    metalfan111 Guest

    I have so much shit bottled up and there is no one to talk to. I don't feel comfortable talking to my parents and I don't want to talk to my "friends" because it will be akward. I'll post a few of my situtations now and more later on.

    Pretty much, I hate my life. I'm a senior in high school and don't have any real friends. At school, there are a couple people I sometimes talk to, but they don't like being around me and there is no one that I can hang out with on the weekend. I hate going to school because I have no one to talk to at lunch or anytime during the day. I feel like everyone is annoyed of me and wants nothing to do with me. In middle school, I had 2 best friends. 1 of them went to the same high school with me, but we drifted so far apart. He is a sellout and hangs out with all the jocks and stuff and obviously tries to avoid me. My other friend goes to another school, his GF makes it so I never see him anymore and doesn't really care about me. Having no friends is soo depressing. Unless you are like me and have no friends, you won't understand how bad it is. To be looked at as a loser.

    I've never had a GF and never kissed a girl before in my life, but somehow about 6 months ago I got oral HSV-1. I know its common, but my situtation is unique. I get constant, horrible outbreaks. My lips get completely swelled up and red, it looks horrible and it hurts soo much. It hurts to talk, eat and even smile and take showers. Touching my lips hurts soo much.

    I went to the doctor, he gave me valtrex to take everyday. I've been doing that for about a month and a half, but now I find out the medicine is making me anemic and I have to stop taking it. It was destroying my body. Now I have no medicine to help the symptoms.

    I get 2-3 outbreaks a month, each lasting 7-10 days, everyday during my outbreaks, I'm in constant hell. My doctor says I have it the worst he has ever seen.

    Because of these outbreaks, I cannot even think about getting a GF. Who the fuck would want to go out with a guy with lips like mine. I can't even kiss anyone. I want a GF so badly but it kills me to think there is no way to get one now. This common virus has helped ruin my life.

    My family life pretty much sucks. My mom had some stuff removed from her body and that has caused permanent hormone problems. She takes medicine everyday for it, but always has violent mood swings. Making every converstation I have with her turn into an arguement.

    I didn't go to homecoming because it would just make me more depressed to go. I wouldn't have a date, I would just stand there and hope someone wants to talk to me. I wouldn't be able to go to any postparty and have no one to hang out with.

    I'm getting ready to apply for college, but I've fucked up so much in high school I'm not going to get into a college I want. I don't want to go to CC for 2 years then transfer. If I'm going to have a chance of getting friends at all, I have to be there from the very beginning for all 4 years. Transfering would kill me.

    All this stress causes more hsv-1 outbreaks and makes them bad. I can't have fun at all. I probably won't have a date for Prom and that will be so embarrassing. I thought of suicide but there is no way I'll do that. So I pretty much hate my life.
  2. rm -rf you

    rm -rf you Guest

    You sound like a spitting image of me. Throw me A PM and maybe we can talk.
  3. Jester

    Jester Active Member OT Supporter

    Oct 30, 2004
    Likes Received:
    I'm sorry to hear about all that. I'm not going to say that I know what you're going through because I really don't. All I know is that it must be pretty rough.

    Whenever someone is dealing with a rough spot in life, there are a few universal things you can do that will make you feel better. I know it's a cliche, but one definition of insanity is doing the same things over and over again and expecting a different result. You need to mix it up a bit.

    Start by eating right and exercising. No matter what, when you do this, you feel better. You're a music fan; learn an instrument. Already know how to play? Look for a band. Want to socialize a little but don't want to approach people? Get a job in a store where you like what they sell and can talk to customers about the stuff.

    This whole experience you are going through right now can either be something you look back at and laugh at or it can be something that you drag into your early 20s and ruin what could be the best time in your life. It's up to you, really.
  4. lost04

    lost04 justme

    Sep 29, 2006
    Likes Received:
    you know're not're kinda like me...and the guy above seems to be in the same sucks sometimes..and it may not be what we want it to be, but sometimes we just need to have faith and believe that everything will turn out fine.
    when i was in highschool (like a year ago) i didn't have much friends either. In middle school i had two best friends just like you..upon entering highschool one went to a different hs and the other went to the same as me..we grew apart...but by junior year we clicked once again and now are the best of friends. she is my only friend. and you know what...i'm ok with that..we're currently attending different colleges...and it's really hard for me to make friends here too...but you know what...not having friends is not such a bad thing....sometimes...i think it's a blessing. cuz to tell you the truth i don't like people much..they annoy me sometimes..most you know what..don't worry..highschool doesn't define who you are...keep your head up high...don't let people make you feel bad about yourself..eleanor roosevelt once wrote/said "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." stay positive and do all that you can to improve yourself. it's not easy but you have many more years ahead of you..and finally....remember ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE.:hug:
  5. dave steel

    dave steel My Kung Fu is the best.

    Feb 22, 2002
    Likes Received:
    Iron City
    High school was a dark experience for many of us. We were surprised how cruel people are. Still, don't be like them. Try and look foward, (9 months and you are out.) set objectivs. I think you will find your post high school experience liberating.

    There is goodness in peace and God is calling people to it.

    College is not far away, start planing now to make it a positive experience.
    Last edited: Oct 4, 2006

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