LGBT "I need some time alone"

Discussion in 'Lifestyle' started by Konowl, Apr 28, 2004.

  1. Konowl

    Konowl New Member

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    So I've been seeing this really great french guy for 2 and a half months now, almost on a nightly basis (and he lives 40 minutes by car). Things looked like they were going great, then today I got a bombshell...

    "I'm not sure if I feel the same way about you anymore. Maybe it's just me, but maybe we should take 3-4 days off from seeing each other."

    This really really hurt me, and I don't know how to feel. Is this a bad omen? We didn't split up, but he basically told me he doesn't love me anymore - and to be honest, it's my fault, as I lost my temper with him.

    I don't know what to do, how to feel. 4 days apart from him is HUGE, like I said, we spent all our free time together and maybe that's part of the problem - that we moved a bit too fast. So I'm gonna take him to a romantic restaurant on Saturday and see how it goes.... but I'm fucking nervous now, and slightly depressed.

    :wtc: :wtc: :wtc:
     
  2. CoCo

    CoCo ...is a Queer Don!! OT Supporter

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    If you've been dating someone for every night for the past 3 months, and 'he doesn't love [you] anymore', then I have a couple of not-so rude awakenings for you. One, it isn't you. No single loss of temper will kill 'love'. Either it wasn't really love, or the feelings weren't reciprocated. Two, how can you just all of a suddenly start seeing someone every night? Not that you were moving too fast, but you know how plants need water, but if you keep giving them water, and then more water, and then more water still, the plant dies?? Is it possible that the two of you were drowning in one another? Could a little time actually be beneficial? Just some random—and sleepy—thoughts...
     
  3. Konowl

    Konowl New Member

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    Yeah, you're right... he never said he didn't love me anymore, just that his feelings have "changed" over the last week or so. Maybe it ties in perfectly with your flower analogy... I hope so...
     
  4. CoCo

    CoCo ...is a Queer Don!! OT Supporter

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    Either way, the biggest point here is that you don’t want to give your heart to any man who isn’t mature enough to handle, cherish, and appreciate it. Hearts are too damn fragile, especially queer hearts. We go through enough shit on the daily to have to worry about the person we assume is gonna luv us. If he isn’t right for you, don’t force it. If he proves to be toying with you OR if he seems to not be as serious as you/you want to be, then you need to pack up, and move on honey. Life is to short, and heartbreak to painful.

    If that isn’t the case, and he just had a momentary freak out, great. Give it time, patch things up, and live very happily ever after at the end of your very own rainbow sweetie!

    :hug:
     
  5. NOVAJock

    NOVAJock Modded & Underrated

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    Based upon my own experience, it's a bad omen and I suggest you prepare yourself for the worst. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but after hearing those same lines of bullshit and getting my hopes up high three times when I gave my ex a chance to get his shit together and his head out of his ass, he failed miserably and I just got hurt and disappointed each and every time. If you think 4 days apart is huge, you should try 7+ months....

    At the initial onset, it's like someone took a knife and drove it through your chest. You're left to walk around like that for the rest of time. Over time, the pain gradually, and very slowly subsides but in some instances, the wound never heals.

    Take what you can from this situation, learn from it, and use it to your advantage in the future....

    Hopefully, things will go well and remain positive when you guys go to dinner.
     
  6. CoCo

    CoCo ...is a Queer Don!! OT Supporter

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    I think you need a hug too, pum'kin...
    :hug:
     
  7. NOVAJock

    NOVAJock Modded & Underrated

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    Actually, I do. This has been a rough year so far.:hs:
     
  8. CoCo

    CoCo ...is a Queer Don!! OT Supporter

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    ...yea, I know. And I've had just as crazy a year. But part of being who we are is that we are resilient. We have overcome all kinds of bashings and inequities and marginalization and disease and political hate and religious condemnation and all kinds of other shit. Collectively, we can make it through all of that and still look fabulous, so I refuse to let a lil matter of a broken heart take me out...
     
  9. RedGoober4Life

    RedGoober4Life New Member

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    Get yourself a doggie. They're never confusing, you can train them not to bite...hard...and they won't waste your time by being fickle.
     
  10. NOVAJock

    NOVAJock Modded & Underrated

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    I've been thinking about it. :o
     
  11. RedGoober4Life

    RedGoober4Life New Member

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    :wiggle: Make sure you can take a week or two off of work so they don't go KWAZY their first two weeks.

    Actually, my pup was lucky, my dad lost his job last summer so he was with her for the first 2 months we had her. :hs:
     
  12. NOVAJock

    NOVAJock Modded & Underrated

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    That's actually, a very good idea. I hadn't thought of that.
     

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