I need some serious help and guidance...

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Ari1979, Jun 2, 2007.

  1. Ari1979

    Ari1979 New Member

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    I've got a lot on my mind and i definitely need some advice. I'm just gonna start typing and hopefully it all makes sense by the end...

    I'm 19 and have been in my current relationship for 2 years. My girlfriend is my best friend and i've had the happiest moments of my life with her. On the flip side, i've also had the most upsetting and angry moments too. I find that lately i've been getting very frustrated and drained by this relationship.

    I sometimes find myself ending one of our tough nights with sincere urges to just leave her and never look back. By tough nights i mean a bad fight or simply being annoyed by her dependency on me(she has very unreliable friends/family). After these nights i feel like i would be much happier without her but find that i change my mind once i cool off.

    This girl is my best friend and a huge part of my life. I feel that i love her but do these frequent doubts mean i shouldn't be in this? I'm so torn! I often want to be single for a change but i care for her too much to ever leave. I worry most of all about deciding to break up and then regretting it after the novelty of being single wears off...

    Another question, mostly directly towards those who have been in long term relationships: Do you have the urge to be with other men/women while in a loving relationship? I find that when i'm out with my friends i want nothing more than to just go pick up a girl at the bar, i miss the spontaneousness of doing something like that. Do feelings like this exist in a loving marriage?

    thanks for letting me vent, any advice or opinions are more than welcomed.
     
  2. wake_o

    wake_o New Member

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    same boat, my friend. grass is always greener...
     
  3. huntz0r

    huntz0r New Member

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    Your first big one, huh?

    I'd tell you that it sounds like things are headed down the tubes and you are better off breaking out sooner than later (before something bad happens). That when you are riddled with doubts about your relationship but still feel desperately in love it usually just means you are desperate.

    But if you're anything like me you'd probably ignore that advice.

    Don't worry though, if you stick around you'll waste some time, but you may learn more.
     
  4. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    You are wasting your youth on a relationship that most likely will not last.

    These should be the best years of your life. Why do you choose to spend them tied down.

    I was always in relationships as a young man, and I regret it.

    You should be free to experience life.

    When you get your freedom back, spend time learning how to date so you aren't dependent on one woman.
     
  5. Midgetized

    Midgetized Don't mess with Douche Cat

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    Yes it means you should end it. You are only staying in this relationship because you are inexperienced and you don't know of anything else. You get so used to being with her that you can't imagine what it's like without her, even though you know you aren't totally happy. Since you are young, you haven't really learned how to read the signs that things are over. You may regret it for a little while but if you stay with her you'll regret it forever because you'll never get to experience other girls. It will take awhile to get over it but in the long run you'll be much better off. High school relationships aren't meant to last forever.


    I've only had those feelings when I've been unhappy with the person I'm dating. If I'm happy with them then I don't really pay much attention to other guys because I've already got what I want.
     
  6. Wrekr9

    Wrekr9 New Member

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    Same boat..
     
  7. SixSecrets

    SixSecrets New Member

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    You are 19. You have your whole life ahead of you. Only YOU can decide what is right for you. Stumble, Soar, Fly, Stretch, indecision, infatuation, love, it's all part of growing up.

    The "unknown" is always evocative. Sometimes we find out that the reason why the grass is greener on the other side of the fence is simply because it is over the septic tank.

    Be careful for what you wish for.
     
  8. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    dating lots of women is really the best option.. so you know exactly what you like and desire in a woman.. you dont really know until you've experienced it firsthand..
     
  9. Gregsaidthat

    Gregsaidthat "Individuality is the new conformity"

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    So fucking true.
     
  10. Gregsaidthat

    Gregsaidthat "Individuality is the new conformity"

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    Some are!
     

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