I need some motivational words plz.

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by ledzep73, Feb 11, 2008.

  1. ledzep73

    ledzep73 New Member

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    What I'm wondering is what you people that are happy have to say about how to be happy. How do you over achievers get the motivation to do what you do? I'm trying to stay sober, but I don't think I can. I know I can't by myself, and I don't really have friends that I can hang around without jeopardizing my sobriety. My phone rings all day all night from friends that want to get high. I quit my job because I've never gone to work sober and I don't feel like working their would be conducive to my sobriety. I dropped out of college after freshmen year, I should go back to school I know. I don't know how to live a sober life, I don't know how to be productive, I don't know how to get shit done. What works for you people, or is it just an inherent skill that I've burnt away? I'm not helpless, but I am. I know I am, but I am proud and headstrong. Fuck man, I just don't know what to do. I need direction. I need a goal or something. It sounds so easy, but it really isn't.
     
  2. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    Have you considered joining a support group for your drug/alcohol concerns? It might be helpful to go through the experience with others who are doing the same thing.

    And at least you might want to post some on the rehab forum here, i'm sure some of the regulars there have gone through this stuff too.
     
  3. ledzep73

    ledzep73 New Member

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    I've browsed the rehab forum, it doesn't seem to be geared towards what I'm dealing with. I could be naive to what really goes on there, but whatever. Really I don't understand what the key to happiness is, or where people get their motivation from.
     
  4. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Well the good news is you realize this...and your goal should be to "get your life back on track and become happy."

    Your situations is tough, it's like building from the ground up from scratch. The first step is associating yourself and finding new people who are clean and won't pressure you in any way to smoke. I have a few stoner friends, but luckily they are still motivated enough and lead very successful lives...then again they never dropped out of college.

    Make a list for yourself of what you want to accomplish. It should read something like this:
    *cut down/cut out smoking completely
    *find new sober friends
    *get back into school
    *find a new job

    Oh, also go to the rehab forum for sure, they all have been through and are going through what you are. If you don't think they can relate to you you just aren't trying. Have you even tried to make a thread in there about your situation?
     
  5. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    What are you addicted to?
     
  6. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    From the av and the whole friends calling him to get high...I'm gonna say pot. That's why he's unmotivated.
     
  7. ledzep73

    ledzep73 New Member

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    I eat 2-3 scripts of hydrocodone a month. I haven't had a xanax binge in a few weeks... but I have woken up before with a very fuzzy memory of the previous week and about a thousand dollars less than I should have. If I was just a pothead I would be set, Id be a senior in college. In all reality I don't have a strong desire to do drugs, I just don't have a desire to do much else. I go to the park with my dog, I practice my qigong and gongfu, I read, but I'm not exactly productive. The best way I can describe how I feel about drugs is like being horny for a really ugly chick. Something I don't really want but can't get out of my mind.
     
  8. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    I thought i saw him say something about pills the other day.

    Edit too late
     
  9. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    You need to get a therapist and get on subutex. You also need to find something to do with your time
     
  10. ledzep73

    ledzep73 New Member

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    Pills. I can't remember the last time I spent money on herb actually, but I still manage to smoke daily. Well I haven't smoked in 3 days, but I can't tell you how long before that was a day without herb.
     
  11. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Yikes dude, why don't you seek actual help first. That should be first on your list. Or you know, use willpower not to buy them :dunno:

    Woops! My bad!
     
  12. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    It doesn't work that way with chemical addictions like that.
     
  13. ledzep73

    ledzep73 New Member

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    I've got too much time. Therapy would be good for me, I like to pretend I don't hold grudges but I really have a hard time forgiving my parents for my childhood. I've never talked to them about it either, they are both out there and think they are perfect. I've never heard of subutex, I'm assuming its something along the lines of methadone?
     
  14. ledzep73

    ledzep73 New Member

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    Ha. Pay for drugs? Thats a very rare thing for me. Thats part of why I got out of hand with it. If I had to pay for the drugs I do I don't think I could have afforded to get to this point. I know I couldn't have.
     
  15. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    A therapist can help with all of that :)
    Are you addicted chemically? Do you get cravings when you go without?
     
  16. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    So you are getting them how? Sexual favors?
     
  17. ledzep73

    ledzep73 New Member

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    I get the shakes a little and I don't have the same appetite. I still eat a lot really, but its a chore and a habit. I'm smoking a shit ton of ciggs, each one is a few minutes that I don't think about it.

    Social networking. Details about getting drugs I will keep to myself, but pretty much I've been in the scene for years and I've met all the right (or wrong) people. I'm the person that you want to know in this part of town.
     
  18. ledzep73

    ledzep73 New Member

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    Cool. Thats some food for thought, thanks.
     
  19. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    You may nto be at a point right now where you need meds, but you DO need therapy, and you do need to cut off contact with these friends. Easier said than done, but you need to get your life back.
    Go out of town for a week or so, somewhere you can't find drugs, and get clean. COme home and work on getting your social life where it needs to be.
     
  20. ledzep73

    ledzep73 New Member

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    I don't think I need meds to quit, the withdrawals are more of an annoyance than anything. I need everything else. You speak from experience don't you? I think I'm cool as fuck, but I really don't know how to have sober friends. My brother is sober, but thats it. Hell, even in my martial arts class there are two pushers, and everyone uses. How do I go about building a new social life that doesn't include drugs?
     
  21. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

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    Hey Square, can you cut that manual sig bullshit out?

    Anyways...

    I think addiction is the sign of a much larger, much more hidden root problem.

    I don't think that people ever really DEAL with addiction until they deal with the things that CAUSE the addiction.

    What I mean is that you are using that stuff to cope with something. What are you trying to cope with? Depression? Anger? A shitty life of some sort?

    I think when you start looking at what you are trying to avoid by doing these things and you fix THAT you'll find that it'll be easier for you to kill the addiction than to just bull your way through and cold turkey yourself from it without really thinking about WHY you are addicted.

    Get what I mean?

    Anyways, I agree with the others. A support of some kind will do you some good. Whether it's therapy, a Narc Anon group, a minister, a church, or just a really good friend that you can lean on and vent to. Find that support.

    Deal with the root of your addiction. Face the mental aspect first and foremost. And be strong man. This world is all about second chances. We fly so high and then we fall so hard and sometimes we don't think we can ever get back up. But I've always discovered that it's at your weakest moments, the times when you just want to say "fuck it", that it's those moments we are the strongest.
     
  22. ledzep73

    ledzep73 New Member

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    I like how you broke it down. What I know and what I feel are two totally different things. Its such a daunting task to build a new life. I have no idea what I want to do in 6 months, let alone a year or 5. I should start small and work my way up to figuring that shit out. I know what I should do, I just don't know how.
     
  23. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

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    It's a good way to get ILed. lol
     
  24. ledzep73

    ledzep73 New Member

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    I do drugs so I don't have to do anything else. I don't know what else to do really. I am a bit full of myself, I am smart as hell and I could do damn near anything. I have no idea what I want to do, so I do drugs.
     
  25. ledzep73

    ledzep73 New Member

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    I don't even know what I want to go to college for. I started martial arts so I wouldn't have to worry about getting raped or shanked if/when I end up in prison. Thats the kind of attitude I've had. I practice daily, and I run with my dog daily. What I really want to do.... I have no idea.
     

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