SRS I live a strange life...

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Vay, Jun 25, 2005.

  1. Vay

    Vay New Member

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    I live a strange life, but I do not know how to change it. I do not like how I am in so many ways that I wish I could change it. Though I have a feeling that I will always be stuck in my life that I am in right now. Some days it just seems to get so hard that I wish.... wish that I was never born.

    Though maybe I am heading to the right direction? Before I got food poisoning on May 4th, 2005 I was working out and walking almost every day. Then after that I stop doing it.

    Though starting couple days ago I am doing it all over again and starting slow and working my self up again. I mean I am not over weight (I weight between 155 to 160 pounds), but not much muscle. I would consider my self a 4 if I am lucky out of a 10.

    I am 20 years old and will be 21 coming really soon. I have had 2 relationships that lasted 9 months each and some others that lasted less (couple of months each). Right now I do not have a girl friend, and I have not had one since 2003.

    Though I am not sure how to change my life around so that I am more out there, and that girls would love to hang around me. I started a business not to long ago.

    I would take a picture, but I am afraid I would get law suits coming after me for causing eye damage :sadwavey: .
     
  2. Vay

    Vay New Member

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    Is there anyone out there that can help me one way or another? I just do not know where to start?
     
  3. wtfmates

    wtfmates New Member

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    Post a pic. No lawsuits will come your way. This isn't the main forum. Not many insults are dished out here. I think.
     
  4. Vay

    Vay New Member

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  5. dazed

    dazed New Member

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    to do:

    haircut
    new glasses/contacts
    new clothes

    you'll feel like a new person, you're a good looking guy, you just need confidence.
     
  6. Alternative

    Alternative Guest

    Sounds like you need to find the "love for one's own body". You look fine, but even if you didn't you can't complain about it because you can't control it.

    Think about being here right now and surviving. Don't think about the past or the future. Let your life flow.

    By the way, your symptoms sound alot like what im suffering from. Im not sure there is a name for the disorder I have though. Suck-at-life disorder? Im not sure. Perhaps describe some other characteristics of yourself. Do you have many friendships? What is your living situation? Where are you living now and where were you living when you were growing up? I'm willing to bet that you feel as though the society around you is all the complete opposite of you. This was the situation for me so I literally got in my car and drove 6000km in search of a new home.
     
  7. johan

    johan Active Member

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    Well, most of your "appearance" issues, in my opinion is actually your self-esteem.
    Honestly.

    Sure, new glasses and a different haircut would help.

    But you know what jumps out mostly? I mean like 90%? Its your defeated, unhappy expression. Now, I know you're not happy -- that's why you posted here.

    But see, instead of your looks making you unhappy, I think it's the other way around.
    You're unhappy. Your body image, posture, facial expression -- all of these things reflect that about you.

    Communication is supposedly only 7% verbal, and 93% non-verbal. What you're seeing in the mirror is shouting out that you're miserable.

    I think you can start to turn this around, and once you get started it will seem easier.
    Take care of the simple stuff first. Just get a better haircut.

    Keep the glasses for now. Change that later. Your taste in glasses will change, when YOU improve how you feel about yourself.

    Those frames that right now seem way too cool, or just "not you" will become the first ones you reach for when you get these things handled.

    Its late, so if you want to continue this then post back before I go on.

    I type way too much as it is, and its starting to seem a bit pointless when most people don't bother updating their threads.
     
  8. PuppyCat

    PuppyCat O.T. Mom

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    I don't think that you're that bad looking...you're still young yet, you have a lot of finding out about yourself to do. Why you are so hard on yourself is beyond me. Some women (and I stress "women" not girls) like men who wear glasses and stuff. It's who you are inside that is important.
    I think though, a smile on your face would improve things 110%.
    Just relax.
    You seem intelligent...intelligent enough to ask for opinions and advice. My best advice to you is not wear horizontal stripes.
    Be happy, find out what it is that you like to do, look around, take pause, hurt nobody, and look in the mirror everyday, smile, and say to yourself "Hey, I'm happening."
    Be active. Do stuff. Stop worrying about your life. Life will happen and I am sure good things will happen to you in it.
    You say you started a biz, well focus it, do the very best you can.
    I am sure that some woman will come along along and be smitten by you. It just takes time.
    And do get a haircut.
    (We will want to see a pic of you with the new hairdo).
    Be gentle with yourself and be patient.
    Oh, and btw, I think you are higher than a 4 on the scale.
     
  9. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Care,for all is like a bonsai tree
    Eye laser surgery? (not without risks i warn you)
    get spikey hair, and a bunch of relaxed cool clothes

    Things I like in guys:
    Intellegence - dont have to be brilliant, but prefer a guy with enough intellegence to find blowing up condom balloons abit imature and just wrong...
    Humor - sarcastic or clean humor I often enjoy, and anyone that can make me smile I always have a tendency of liking.
    Uniqueness - someone with distinct qualities is always nice, cant really explain fully...
    Hygene - someone clean is definately good... nothing turns a person off worse than walking up to someone and being distracted from the person wondering what could be crawling through their hair or what that pungent smell is.
    Active - someone who has stuff to talk about is always fun, instead of standing around in a awkward silence.
    Personality - easy going/shy/strong willed/confident
    guys a year younger than me, same age as me, or a max of 2 years older than me I prefer.
    etc...

    Some tips from girls

    Things I dislike/turn me away from:
    Guys that classify girls in two ways - "The hot chicks" and "The fat chicks" ...
    Guys that are just out for a sex hunt
    Guys that break promises
    Over religous/Convinced their thinking is the only right way for the world
    etc...

    And you seem to be to tight in your body, you look really too tense and worried over a lot of silly things, maby that's not true but from what you showed, look

    Choises define situations, every choise can lead to a new reality, therefore make well thought strong choises in your life that strenghten your position.
     
  10. Vay

    Vay New Member

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    First on the Eye laser surgery aka Lasik yes I have been thinking of getting it for the last year or so. Though I will not be getting it until I find well known "doctors" who do that type of stuff.

    As for a hair cut... what kind? Spike up the front? All? Or another kind of hair cut?

    I know I had to start changing things in my life because I was not really that happy. Though I have never thought about killing my self since I feel life can only get better. I started to work out every other day now (Walking 4 miles as well), and trying to get a some what of a tan as well.

    As for clothes... I have horrible taste I guess in clothes. I could take some pictures I guess of some of them.

    As for glasses... should I go for the contacts way? Or what style of glasses?

    As well thanks for everyone trying to make me feel better. Now I can go to work more happy! :wavey: ( I work part time while I get my business up and going).
     
  11. dazed

    dazed New Member

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    Just get a normal buzz cut. Tell them to give you a number 3 all around and shape up the front. Go for the contacts. If you have a terrible taste in clothes, look around online at some sights and see what you like, a lot of websites have reccomended pants/shirts that go together.

    The first key to happiness is self-confidence. Once you feel better about your looks, everything falls into place. You are a good looking guy, and I'm not just saying that.

    Plus you say you're getting your business up and going, and that's awesome. You've got a lot going for you, but it's up to you to pull it all together.
     
  12. dazed

    dazed New Member

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    If you're starting a business, you seem mature. Check out Express/Bannana Republic for nice casual dressy wear.
     
  13. Vay

    Vay New Member

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    What would a number 3 all around shape up the front look like (got any pictures for example?). Thanks




     
  14. dazed

    dazed New Member

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  15. Vay

    Vay New Member

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  16. Toasty

    Toasty Naked people have little or no influence on societ

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    I agree that your smile (or lack thereof) is your only problem in those pictures.

    You might consider splurging one time and going to an actual saloon to get some hairstyle advice. Yes...it's a bit metro :greddy: But you go to the professionals if you want something done right. If all else fails, the crew cut can come easy later right?

    Just tell them your intentions (e.g., you want to look professional for your customers, you want to impress a lady, want to look more trendy, etc) and let them decide for you what looks good for your facial structure. $30 - $50.
     
  17. JordanClarkson

    JordanClarkson OT Supporter

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    I would suggest that you join a kickboxing or grappling gym. 90% of the guys there are ugly as sin but guess what, none of them give a shit. You look way better than me but I don't give a shit either. And yeah I think your biggest problem is a lack of "good vibes." Smile more.
     
  18. LiQuiD_FuSioN

    LiQuiD_FuSioN New Member

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    Wow Vay, you look almost like me!
     
  19. Indagator

    Indagator Twist of Cain

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    Lifestyle change. All that was mentioned + other things like your breathing make a difference.
     
  20. LiQuiD_FuSioN

    LiQuiD_FuSioN New Member

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    You even look BETTER than I do.. you look great, trust me Vay.. someone who looks almost similar except I've got a bigger nose and I don't have any cool hairstyle at all.
     
  21. KatWoman

    KatWoman •••••••••••

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    Turn the :sad2: into :big grin: or :blue: and that will help in many ways. You're ugly only if you keep telling yourself that, everything is wrong if you are convinced it is so. If you keep having negative thoughts/feelings about yourself, you will project that to others and inadvertently drive people away. I know this, because it happened to me. After changing my attitude and the way I looked at things life is much easier to live :)
     
  22. Vay

    Vay New Member

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    You know I wonder how many people say I look better then them are telling the truth *cough* I think we need to see some pictures ;).

    Anyways yes I have went to a style place for hair one time which cost a fortune ($40 with a $20.00 discount).

    I am not really sure what colors of clothes I should be looking for? Or what style? I do like buying clothes from Old Navy and I have bought some clothes from Walmart. Though the shirts I bought at Walmart I would say where some very nice shirts (fancy shirts).
     
  23. LiQuiD_FuSioN

    LiQuiD_FuSioN New Member

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    What KatWomen said.. if you change your outlook on life, things will be much easier to get more out there and girls will catch that. It's about staying commited to this attitude which some of us have trouble doing .... Honestly, you do look better than ]me[/color]
     
  24. PuppyCat

    PuppyCat O.T. Mom

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    :naughty: Tight jeans, especially if you have a cute butt.
    :) Whatever you wear, make sure your clothes are clean.
    :noes: Going out on a limb here, but, personally, I like a man who smells nice, a tad of men's cologne wouldn't hurt (don't bathe in it to the point where peeps can smell you before they see you)
    :) Women like men who SMILE.

    I know you can pull this off, change your outside, but always remember, in the final analysis, regardless of what you look like, what attitude you chose, it is what is "inside" that ultimately counts and means the most. One can look devestatingly yummers on the outside, but if you do not have "soul" and "heart" one has nothing. So, speaking as a woman who is old enough to be your Mother (yikes), don't just focus on a hairstyle, clothes, etc., think about improving what's inside f you as well. Be kind, compassionate and gentle. Work on your confidence. Manners (yes manners!) are important.

    Odds are that you will become a "Babe Magnet", you have intelligence, one can only assume that you will do well with your chosen path.

    I, as well as others, look forward to seeing a pic of you with new hair style, wearing one of your Wal-Mart "fancy shirts".

    Be happy.
     

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