SRS I lied to my gf

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by niquesuave06, Jul 7, 2006.

  1. niquesuave06

    niquesuave06 New Member

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    About something stupid. I denied having smoked a cig when I really had, and we had always kind of agreed to not become habitual smokers. I felt bad about it all night and I finally confessed when I dropped her off at home. She got really pissed at me, but all I could tell her is that I felt so bad that I couldn't even go along with a lie she believed.

    I feel fucking horrible. I deceived her, even though it was about something small.

    I really hope she trusts me again, or atleast she realizes that I care so much about her that I can't lie to her.

    I don't know what to do. I want her trust again.
     
  2. Jay Pheezy

    Jay Pheezy New Member

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    Guess that's just what happens with addictions :dunno: She'll get over it soon just as long as you keep a clean record from now on.
     
  3. illmaceyougood

    illmaceyougood New Member

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    That's the kind of thing you really shouldn't have told her, especially if it was just one cigarette. I mean, unless you're going to be with her the rest of your life, it would've been better to just keep it to yourself and not do it again.
     
  4. niquesuave06

    niquesuave06 New Member

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    I don't know how long I'll be with her, but I know I love her now and I couldn't continue a lie with her.
     
  5. Grouch

    Grouch Guest

    its a ciggerette. not a big deal. She'll get over it.
     
  6. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    This exact issue is going to end my sister's relationship. It's not even that he smokes cigarettes, it's that he has the ability to lie to her.
     
  7. niquesuave06

    niquesuave06 New Member

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    Exactly. She wasn't upset that I smoked a cigarette, she was upset that I lied to her and I didn't show any sign of it.

    Like I said before, I just hope she can see that even though I am able to lie to her that it hurts me when I do. I can honestly say I'm ashamed of myself.
     
  8. kristaliah

    kristaliah New Member

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    Ahh.. I see. The problem isnt that you smoked, but that you were able to lie to her so easily and THAT is why she is hurt.

    You just have try to make her understand that you lying to her was hard and that you felt terrible about it. Tell her that you don't ever want to feel that way again.. and that lying really messed you up. Just be honest. You obviously feel guilty.. Just try to express that to her.
     
  9. niquesuave06

    niquesuave06 New Member

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    :bigthumb: I concurred.

    I usually don't get that emotional/upset about things, so when I do I don't know how to deal with them very well. She always told me how, when she was really upset about something or at someone, she would write them a letter and just throw it away. I decided to do the same and I wrote her a letter last night, and I emailed it to her this morning. She accepted my apology.

    Writing things down really helped with that whole emotion thing :wiggle:

    I'm sure you can probably tell I was freaking out in the first couple of posts, I usually am not affected by that kind of stuff and it freaked me out a bit.
     
  10. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Well you can stop punishing yourself if you really reflected on what you have done. Its useless to keep feeling bad about it, just go and don't do it anymore.
     
  11. SpectraRedZ

    SpectraRedZ New Member

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    The worst part to her is that she saw that you lied to her very easily. Granted you broke down and told her in the end, you were still able to lie to her about something. My boyfriend did that to me once, (something larger than a cigarette, but not relationship-ending either) and to this day I still hate the fact he had the ability to lie to me (and not tell me for 4 days, after I found out on accident).

    She will get over it I'm sure, but dont repeatedly be smoking behind her back, hiding things, or lying.
     

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