something i really dont like. a little background, im a pretty popular kid, ive always been really outgoing and fun loving, a person people can count on, that sort of shit. i just got done with my first year of college and will be heading back for my second year this weekend. ive had a core group of friends my whole life, its been pretty much the same people and they mean alot to me, i always try and help them out as much as i can and i really go out of my way for them, whether they realize it or not. but i recently noticed that sometimes my actions are not so pure and are not to help them out in the way that they need. i feel like i try to sabatoge them and their relationships, sometimes. i feel like sometimes i have this strong desire for their worlds to colapse and i will be the only one standing, ready to help them. i am happy when they come to me for help, i truely am, but sometimes i feel like i am creating the need for help in them, or at least trying to. needless to say i feel like shit.