SRS I hit a new low in my life today...not sure what to do...

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by FSTMX5, Feb 11, 2008.

  1. FSTMX5

    FSTMX5 New Member

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    So...basically me and my wife got married just last month...we are both in the air force same job but she is airborne and slated to go to nebraska...im a ground linguist and here at fort meade. we were told it would be no problem at all for me to switch to airborne within the next year and today i come to find out thats not the case...apparently they suddenly have no openings even though im a critical language. They arent going to let her switch to ground and come out here either....basically we got lied to hardcore and now have no idea how long it will be till we can be together. She is the most amazing girl ive ever met in my life and i love her more than anything, i dont think she can handle the distance which it seems as of now is indefinite


    ive never been so depressed in my life...i came home from work today and literally just broke down...i dont really know why i wrote this ...i guess i just needed to tell someone
     
  2. KatWoman

    KatWoman •••••••••••

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    :hug: Keep badgering whatever authorities need to be badgered and remind them that you're married. The squeeky wheel always gets the grease :)
     
  3. FSTMX5

    FSTMX5 New Member

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    i have been...but i thinki ran out of options as of today....my wife is coming out to visit tonight too and i dont even know how to tell her this news
     
  4. tenxia

    tenxia OT Supporter

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    persist persist persist

    good luck!!
     
  5. Yuppy

    Yuppy Have a seat right there....

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    my friend just left the military. general discharge after going AWOL
     
  6. FSTMX5

    FSTMX5 New Member

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    i really ...ive never felt this bad ever ...ever since i came home ive just been crying and staring at the wall...
     
  7. KatWoman

    KatWoman •••••••••••

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    Talk to your wife...maybe she can find the right people to speak to.
     
  8. Bennybenguin

    Bennybenguin Active Member

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    Did they ever give you anything in writing that said you two would be together?
     
  9. Dreams2Reality

    Dreams2Reality saywhat

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    :(

    :grouphug:

    Hang in there brother.. Alone or together, I still respect and appreciate everything ya'll are doing for us fine Americans.

    Hang in there brother.
     
  10. FSTMX5

    FSTMX5 New Member

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    the thought of us not making it is really eating me away...i cant believe its a possibility ill be married for like 2 months and thats it....
     
  11. SteveYoungblood

    SteveYoungblood New Member

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    Really, I'm sorry to hear that. Sounds like a horrible situation that I certainly don't envy for one second. However it turns out, hopefully it ends up for the best. Don't lose hope.

    Having said that, I do have one question for you:
    Just as a question, and not an accusation, is that the truth there? After all you said about loving her more than anything, you're saying that you don't think she can handle the distance? That sounds vaguely like a cop-out.

    Like I said, hopefully, there's some alternative that will allow you to be together. But if there really is no other way, you both have to be strong and optimistic. And in order for you both to be strong together, you have to be strong individually. Using the old "my partner can't handle this" excuse, when in fact it is you who is struggling with this situation, is not going to lead to the best outcome.
     
  12. FSTMX5

    FSTMX5 New Member

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    no its not a cop out at all, honnestly its hard but i can handle it. But shes been down about it for awhile here about the whole situation. Maybe im overreacting a bit ....like i said shes coming out here tonight and will be here for 10 days...i guess we have a lot of talking to do
     
  13. SteveYoungblood

    SteveYoungblood New Member

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    Fair enough. Either way, being as strong and optimistic as you can be is really all you can do to get through. If you go in with a defeatist attitude, fearing that this will be the end of your marriage, then this is going to be a miserable period for you that probably WILL lead to the end of your marriage. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy, which is far worse than the bad situation by itself. Every fight that you have will end with "I knew this was going to happen."

    The best thing that can happen here is that you don't end up having to spend too much apart. The next best thing that can happen is for you two to prove the old adage of "whatever doesn't kill you only makes you stronger" true.
     
  14. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

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    She married you, I'm assuming she took vows. If distance kills the relationship, imagine when a real obstacle comes along. For her or you to bail on each other would just be truly sad.

    You can tell her I said that too if she does decide she can't take it.
     
  15. toroweedeater1

    toroweedeater1 New Member

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    I have been in the AF for 8 years now and i can tell you i have seen this happen more than once. I can tell you my old roommate and his wife were both AD AF. She worked as the finance controller @ a recruiting station in PA and he was POL in NM. They weren't able to move her job, even though they made promises to more her to McGuire, NJ. He finally was able to talk to the functional and he was able to get him stationed out in NJ which was a 4 hr drive from where she was working at. I can tell you that he bought a lot of plane tickets in the year it took him to get to NJ and went to see her about every month or two. Maybe if you "threaten" a cross train they will re-think there position on you going AB linguist.
     
  16. 04JETTA

    04JETTA OT Supporter

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  17. easeupoffmynuts

    easeupoffmynuts MVP OF SUCK

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    this is sad news but it should be a catalyst for you to start talking and writing to everybody you know to get this done
     
  18. FSTMX5

    FSTMX5 New Member

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    so yesterday was pretty much the worst day of my life ...I spent basically the whole day crying with my wife, we were told it will be about 2 years till we can be together and my wife can't handle it ...and I can't really blame her ..I guess she still wants to be together but she just can't be married and apart for so long ...I hate my life
     
  19. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

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    Go up to the Barracks (here on OT) forum and ask the posters there what options you have dude. I bet there's some things you can do.
     
  20. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

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    That is messed up.
     
  21. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Umm, why can't you guys make it work? If you really love someone you make it work. Whether you supposedly can't really be reunited for good for 2 years there are still visits and phonecalls...People make it work. NON-MARRIED couples make it work.

    Sounds like you guys aren't strong enough and shouldn't have gotten ready if you aren't capable of such a commitment.
     
  22. ///M Pilot

    ///M Pilot New Member

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    I thought the AF was big on keeping married couples together?

    I think you need to keep talking to superiors.
     
  23. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Uhm...why can't she make it? Doesn't she love you? Is she THAT needy that she must have you close to her at all times?

    I mean I know she prolly wants you there and that's very natural. It's even natural for her to be really, really sad about the circumstances. But come on....this doesn't mean you won't be married after the 2 years.....and you never know what might happen during those 2 years. Something might work out to help you guys be closer.....I know....you've tried but don't give up. Keep trying and be patient.

    So your perfect idea for marriage isn't working out. But that doesn't mean you have to get divorced and try again with someone else. That's just the most ridiculous notion EVER!! Seriously, that sounds like a little spoiled kid that if he doesn't get exactly what he wants, right when he wants it, he'll nuke anyone and everyone around him.

    I don't mean to be insensitive to your plight....trust me, I get it and I would be very happy for you both if you would be able to realize your dreams. However, we all have to live by laws and rules and very often those conflict with what we would really like to have in our lives. But this can be a HUGE growing experience for you both.....even if it's not the perfect solution.

    Good luck.
     
  24. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Thank you. Read my post ^^^

    I love how couples think they are so in love and ready for marriage...and the second they have a big hard bump in the road they have to face they just fall apart and assume it'll never work :rolleyes:
     
  25. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Yeah, I've known people that don't even hit a big hard bump....they just hit more like a little speed bump and all of a sudden :run: it's over! Then they got drunk, had sex and realized it wasn't as bad as they thought.

    I dunno what's going on with you kids these days. :rofl: You guys are all so impatient. Back when I was your age....
     

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