I have 1 year...

Discussion in 'Fitness & Nutrition' started by psykosis, Oct 17, 2005.

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  1. psykosis

    psykosis Go placidly amid the noise and the haste

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    My wife, for her 40th birthday, wants me in shape. I have one year. By next Oct. 17th, I'd like to lose about 60 or 70lbs. I'm 6'1", about 275lbs, and waaaaaay out of shape. I need a good diet, and a regular workout routine. I don't have the $ for a gym membership. I do have an exercise ball and live in a split-level home, so I have stairs to work with. Please help me with this. I'll post my results on here weekly. I really need to get into shape. I can do maybe 5 pushups, and about the same situps. I'll give you guys 1 weeks to come up with a regiment. Please keep in mind tuna, broccolli, and brussle sprouts make me ill. I'll try just about anything else. I also have a problem w/ cottage cheese, sour cream, or yogurt.
     
  2. Perkwunos

    Perkwunos Dog Bones OT Supporter

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    FUCK YOU YOUPIECE OF SHIT FAT FUCK!
     
    Last edited: Oct 17, 2005
  3. shastaisforwinners

    shastaisforwinners OT Supporter

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    Jesus fucking christ.
     
  4. JAFAR

    JAFAR FPS whore OT Supporter

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  5. ChosenGSR

    ChosenGSR Mama always said you'd be the chosen one

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    I don't need a week, get a new wife.
     
  6. Phineas Q Stork

    Phineas Q Stork Active Member

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    tell your wife that you are beautiful on the inside
     
  7. Placebo

    Placebo New Member

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    Wow, just wow.
     
  8. Placebo

    Placebo New Member

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    Just reading this thread pisses me off...
     
  9. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    Durty Durty ATL Niggah

    First of all we are not here to serve you, we give you the tools and you figure it out for yourself. If this pisses you off, go the fuck away and hire some twiggy personal trainer who will make you feel better.

    Second, it’s not going to be easy. Otherwise everyone would have an excellent body, it take a lot of hard work and dedication. That includes eating things you don't like at times (tuna, cottage cheese) and skimping in other aspects of your financial life in order to meet your goals. You say you can't afford a gym membership? Cancel your cable/satellite and Internet; get your news from the radio and Internet access at your local library.

    Third, SEARCH!! All the information you need has been covered at least once in this forum. If you don’t find what you are looking for or don’t understand something, then ask a specific question.


    Good Luck with your endeavor.
     
  10. JAFAR

    JAFAR FPS whore OT Supporter

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    You're at your mid-life crisis stage now arent you? Trade in the wife for a Vette.
     
  11. uf20wop

    uf20wop OT Supporter

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    fucking quit now

    you think youd honestly lose 5 lbs with the attitude of a 5 year old retarded giraffe?
     
  12. uf20wop

    uf20wop OT Supporter

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    fuck that i hope his wife cheats on him with an 16 yr old kid
     
  13. KenKaniff

    KenKaniff Guest

    Jesus fucking christ
     
  14. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    :rofl:
     
  15. jonno

    jonno New Member

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  16. dmaestro

    dmaestro New Member

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    Your head.
    1. leap head first down your flight of stairs.
    2. repeat until you are too retarded to use a keyboard or the internet
    3. ????
    4. profit
     
  17. uf20wop

    uf20wop OT Supporter

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    :rofl:
     
  18. ryazbeck

    ryazbeck New Member

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    The reason you are fat is because you get everyone to do everything for you, like write up a routine. If I were your disgusting fat ugly wife I'd murder you for being so fat and repulsive (6'1" 275? oh my god thats gross, i bet just seeing you naked is worse than sucking dog cock covered in horse shit) and then I'd blow my own fat, water retaining, sack-of-shit head off all over the wall.
     
  19. mr. ant

    mr. ant OT Supporter

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    Funny, I never realized that sour cream was a form of cutting food
     
  20. cavefish

    cavefish You ain't a crook son, you just a shook one

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    I'm giving you guys ONE WEEK to spoon feed me a diet and workout routine...OR ELSE.

    Your motivation should be to lose weight so you can pick up hot women half your age. Pics of wife?

    I also think its funny that you're around 40 years old yet you have a pic of some evil clown in your avatar and your user text is straight out of a 16 year old goth's livejournal.
     
  21. stealthrapt0r

    stealthrapt0r me lift weights

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    is your wife going to leave you if you fail?
     
  22. uf20wop

    uf20wop OT Supporter

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    or else hes gunna eat us :noes:
     
  23. psykosis

    psykosis Go placidly amid the noise and the haste

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    um, shit. I didn't mean to piss anyone off, I'm just looking for help here. Obviously I have no idea about timelines here. I guessed a week would be sufficient to come up with something, but i guess I was wrong. Please, i want to do this. I want to get in shape, but I need help. I cannot do this on my own. I'm asking the fitness crew for help. Tell me what I need to do to accomplish my goals...
     
  24. psykosis

    psykosis Go placidly amid the noise and the haste

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    thank you. I've gathered the calorie > thing. I'll check fitday.com. I appreciate the help.

    Please keep in mind I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT I'M DOING. It was easy to become a fatass, all I had to do was eat and watch football. Now I need to change that.
     
  25. Perkwunos

    Perkwunos Dog Bones OT Supporter

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    READ U LAZY FUCK!lc
     
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