SRS I Hate being alone in these decisions...

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Nyx05, Feb 9, 2006.

  1. Nyx05

    Nyx05 Guest

    I'll try to keep this short but I just need to get it off my chest.

    I just graduated from college (May '05). Moved about 4 hours away from home and 2 from school. I'm alone out here and I feel like the degree I got is a total sham. I feel like it won't get me a good job. And the guy that I'm in love with feels so unattainable right now even though we have plans to get married in the next year or so. (He lives back at school finishin up his ed.) He isn't really helping me make decisions right now and I feel like I'm just hanging out there.

    So... I've decided to go back home. He'll follow when he graduates.(May) Now.. what do I do when I get there? Do I go back to school for the degree I should have gotten or do I try and find a job that will pay bills. He wont tell me what idea he likes and wont even really help me talk through it. I get the feeling he doesnt want me to go back to school. And I do want to go back but there's the money aspect. So im just kinda in the dark. I don't even know if the degree I'd get would be worth all the hassel.

    There.. I'm done... thanks for listening
     
  2. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    Magnum, it's always possible if you're willing to work for it ;) (schooling). I have a husband and a child, but we really cut down on spending, saved some money, took out some student loans (for tuition) and I'm in school full time. As you said, there's nothing worse than getting stuck in a job that you hate because it pays the bills.
    Nyx05, have you talked to him about this? If you are engaged and planning to be married he needs to be apart of the decision making process as well.
     
  3. Nyx05

    Nyx05 Guest

    Thats what I told him but he's kinda avoiding the topic. My degree is in business right now. I'm working at a craptastic job that I hate and I moved out here cause I couldn't go back home at the time. (That's a whole nother story! lol) But, I can go home now. Money is a big probelm with the shcool thing cause my Dad distroyed my credit so loans and such are hard to get. I have bene thinking about going into the police force cause they do tuition reimbursment and tin is in my blood. The degree I would get would be more of a computer graphics and desgin degree. (2-3 years) Just hard with him being in his last semester and such.

    Thanks for the support guys!
     
  4. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    Is he truly serious about your relationship? If he is, then the two of you NEED to sit down and decide TOGETHER where to go from here. You need to find what you want to do (and what you think you'll enjoy doing, because I see quite a few different options in the above post) to be happy with yourself and ultimately happy in your marriage.
    There's something about your post that makes me think maybe your relationship isn't as serious as you think it is. How long have you two been together?
     
  5. Nyx05

    Nyx05 Guest

    Over a year together now. There's been a lot of shit together like he was married when we first met (almost 3 year ago). We talk online/phone everyday several times a day and usually take a trip to each other at least once a week. (2 hours aint nothing!) We've already started planning for the wedding actually. We also have some business ideas put together for when we move back home. That's another one of the options but that can be done in conjunction with my school. I dont know.. and I think you're right. When we see wach other we on't want to ruin our lil time together but we need to sit down and talk to each other about what is going on. Hopefully I'll get that chance this weekend when I go up there. Thanks guys!
     
  6. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    I don't like that idea that he is so unsupportive, but seeing he might be in stress himself with the whole ED thing. I see it like this, you are going to get married, you need money to support a household, and getting a job would only be natural. It would provide more stability then a mere diploma , the idea is that whenever you apply for a job you can wave around your deck with that grade of yours for whatever job you are going to get yourself , next to that comes the following you could apply to a local job agency, and get a job from them, a job is usually never what you expected, but it doesn't have to be permanent, you could try 3 different jobs (although if your first job is great just stay with it(whatever is best for you))

    Now if you have a job (maby in the future) you could always take a course next to it with the money you made from your job, that way you could have a job and learn if necessary. From those points of reasoning i would go for the job , in the horrible case that whatever in the future fails, you'd still have a financial backbone to some extend to lean on if you saved a portion from your earned money, this way you will safegaurd your future more or less and build in securities for that same future. That's only my opinion on it and of course you have free will to decide what you want , its not like if you have a job that you are unable to quit and attend school again, nowadays all of that is possible, but for now i say you should get a job. :wavey:
     
  7. Nyx05

    Nyx05 Guest

    Thanks guys! It's been an eventful weekend and I think its kinda moot now. I'm going to school. And... well... he and i.. you may be right, 03 white zx3. My friend told me this weekend to not get into my head cause I didn't have permission. lol. I'm trying to think things through without driving me crazy essentially. I just don't know what to do right now. I want someone to hurt and I want to hate him but I don't. And I can't. Thanks for ya'lls support!:hs:
     
  8. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    :ughug:
    Hang in there. Things have a funny way of working themselves out.
     

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