SRS I feel used, and IM A GUY!

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by lilxyoshi, Sep 28, 2005.

  1. lilxyoshi

    lilxyoshi Nerdy PreMed

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    this sucks, why am i having these feelings?

    oh...let me get you guys in gear first of all.

    I proposed "friends with benefits" to an old high school friend (who's a girl and really..smoking hot...like a 8/10) that NEVER even talked to me throughout high school until we graduated.

    kind of odd, but i told her that statement so it would be akward so she would never talk to me again, but to my dismay...she accepted.

    we never talk, all she does is call me and tells me to come over, when i come over...we just get right to the action. a little foreplay and then the good stuff.

    she asked me a couple of nights ago if I wouldnt mind bein friends with benefits to her other friend, being the horny guy that I am i agreed to spend some quality time with her friend. Yup, we did it.

    are these feelings weird? i talked about this with my best friend and he told me that i should be happy and that 90% of the guys in this world would be in my shoes.

    i just posted this cause she called my phone 4 times now and i have 4 missed calls, i know what she wants anyway but i feel so damn guilty about doing this.

    is this even a problem? will it go away? if it is a problem, how do i solve it? do i just "stop" doing the things i do with her? ill that consider me being homosexual? help........................
     
  2. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    Um, what the fuck is your problem?
     
  3. Fred91GTA

    Fred91GTA New Member

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    Dude, if you have a problem with it, recommend me to your friend. I'll be friends with benefits with her and as many of her female friends as she likes.

    I'll even do it for free too. Come on guy, look at the great service I'm providing here!
     
  4. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    I'm sorry you feel this way, but at the same time, later on, when all u've got is porn, you may regret passing up great sex, even without emotional involvement. You know?
     
  5. BradUF

    BradUF Guest

    Yes what the hell is wrong with you.
     
  6. RyeBread

    RyeBread If you tell the truth you don't have to remember a

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    you may have just reached a level of maturity that takes some of us a while longer to reach. In this case, it seems that you are willingly using her too?

    Part of the issue, is that for some guys, phsical interaction is a form of intimacy. You are being physically intimate with someone, and yet aren't connected. Yes, most of us like to act like we are cock centered, and only strive to get/keep it wet.

    While that may in fact be partially true, many of us also have a hidden side and are craving a deeper connection. Some of us are too scared to acknowledge that need, cause it's not "manly" or for whatever reason.

    In my youth (I'm 36 now) I went through 20 women in 12 months after a particularily harsh break up with someone who I was convinced was my soulmate.

    Physically, it was awesome. I got to participate in all sorts of stuff that the typical, 13 year old OTer only reads about in Penthouse Forum. Not bragging, just fact. But I digress, yes, physically it was awesome. At the time, it was also what I thought awesome for my psyche, and emotions, as I was "getting back" at "the one".

    In the end, I too felt sub-human, a slave to my cock, my compulsions and just felt worthless. Even those that were as you indicate, completely ok with it just being phsical. It got to a point where I wasn't ok with it.

    That being said. If she's as hot as you say, and has hot friends that are also looking to get it; ask yourself why are you giving in to it? If it's for a lack of something/one else to do, then get out there, and try to find "the one" to make a connection with, and on the off-nights, give 'em what they want ;)
     
  7. johan

    johan Active Member

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    RyeBread speaks with much wisdom.

    As for the original poster, you should devote more time to establishing a real connection with someone who cares for you. Spend a little less time fucking these girls. You may wish to record the proceedings for future use ;)

    That's the thing about FWB, they're unstable and aren't meant for long-term.

    When you do find a real caring relationship, the FWB won't interest you any more. Seriously. It won't.

    But for now, try dating a bit more, that should satisfy your need for emotional connection.

    Why not try dating the interesting but less physically attractive girl you previously wouldn't have considered? Since you're already regularly fucking 2 hotties, you ought to feel secure enough to step outside your usual boundaries.

    And don't forget the videocam.
     
  8. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    Sounds like you are normal. Just sex is emotionally draining. I don't do it any more (Im 36) because it's just ... uncomfortable.

    If you don't like it, call it off.
     
  9. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    It's as simple as, if you are single and enjoy having sex with hot girls without the attachment of a relationship, then do it. If you don't like what you are doing, then don't do it. Sheesh, what's the issue?

    If I was single and some hot babes wanted to use me like this, then why not? It's not many times in ones life that you can do something like this. Either enjoy it for the temproary thing that it is, or stop.
     
  10. RotiEatter

    RotiEatter New Member

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    I want to be in your shoes :(
     
  11. johan

    johan Active Member

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    The issue is that he's having problems, but doesn't understand WHY because free unattached sex with 2 hotties is supposed to be every man's dream.

    And so now that he's reached the Promised Land, he doesn't understand WHY he isn't insanely happy.

    There's more to it than just a simple "like it, do it. don't like it, stop" thing.
     
  12. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Care,for all is like a bonsai tree
    Nothing can make you happy exept Love, this is why in the end you feel miserable because a friend with benefit isn't a relationship that contains the love that your soul needs to actually feel happy in the end with. Its your choise tho.
     
  13. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    That's not what I got from it. I thought he was complaining about feeling used.
     
  14. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    BEFORE you do that, though... threesome. Jesus... hot anal oral golden showers whipped cream video sextravaganza threesome.
     
  15. Fred91GTA

    Fred91GTA New Member

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    Hey, if he's reached that level of maturity, great. If he's having problems, he should stop. If he wants a more serious relationship, he should go out and seek one. Basically, he should do whatever makes him feel better about himself.

    On the other hand, those poor girls would be left without a fuck buddy. Think about how hurt they would be. Which is why I'm volunteering to take his place. :x:
     
  16. JordanClarkson

    JordanClarkson OT Supporter

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    It's fun, but this isn't going to make you happy one bit. In fact it'll make you feel even more empty.

    If you're in a relationship without sex you don't feel attractive. If you're in a relationship without love you don't feel lovable. They are equally bad when you feel that you need both.

    FWB's work best when you don't see each other that often. It acts as an excuse for you two to not be able to have a real relationship. If you see each other often, at least one (usually only one) is going to feel like they want more than just sex.

    Sometimes it's fun to feel sexually used though. :)
     
  17. RyeBread

    RyeBread If you tell the truth you don't have to remember a

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    :rofl: just the thing for the grand kids to trip across 50+ years from now...

    and johan flatters me. there may be a bit of wisdom in my cluttered head from the years of abuse and pain I've done, or allowed to be done to me, but in re-reading what I typed, damn it wasn't an easy read.

    a pretty incohesive series of how I strung some thoughts together. Hopefully the "gist" of it didn't get lost in the poor syntax.
     
  18. lilxyoshi

    lilxyoshi Nerdy PreMed

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    thanks for the honest replies guys.

    yes, it would be a good idea if a fellow OTer took my place, im sick and tired of it.

    i feel used
    i feel like im using them
    i need a steady relationship and someone who would say something else to me instead of "hey, wanna come over?"

    anyone in the socal area? 626? 323? 818?
    PM me, we are having a "get together" in 3 days
    when i mean "we" its me, her and her friend.
    they both know that i bone each one of them on the side, but they dont really care because they simply view me as "someone I dont care about, but have FUN with"
    in short, I NEED SOMEONE TO TAKE MY PLACE
    my friends cant do it because they have their girlfriends

    P.S. THEY'RE ASIAN, so if you dont like asian girls....dont bother PMin me tellin me how much you hate asians.

    I'm at school right now so i couldnt get any good pics, but heres a pic they took a while back ago, they look 10x hotter now.
    [​IMG]

    the girl in the middle and the girl on the left, the girl on the right moved to san diego but i occasionally talk to her online because she wants to hear about how i "boned" her friends.

    so yea, just shoot me a PM if you want to fill my spot.
     
  19. enexgee

    enexgee New Member

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    threesome, ftw
     
  20. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    i would so fucking hit that shit (middle) and yet here i am on the east coast.
     
  21. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    I think you need to learn how to relax and enjoy the moment. If it isn't for you, then the answer is simple.
     
  22. lilxyoshi

    lilxyoshi Nerdy PreMed

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    it isnt for me, i want out

    please take my place

    ...no kiddin
     
  23. johan

    johan Active Member

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    The middle one isn't bad. The other two...well, I guess lights do come with OFF switches...
     
  24. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    I would if I was single. However I have an amazing girlfriend and am happy where I am at.
     
  25. AshLee

    AshLee New Member

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    i completely understand how you are feeling. i had a fwb once and it was my idea...and its not that i got to this point where i wanted a relationship with him. it just became like we knew that was going to happen the minute one of our phones rang..and yes the sex was great all the time, but i did just feel empty. its like "yeah i just had this awesome sex" but it just didnt matter. you want someone to lay with you and be happy and not just have it be "fun"...and what it comes down to is...the longer u drag it on, the worse it gets. peoples feelings will EVENTUALLY be involved and me being a girl..hers may already and shes just in denial about it, i did that for a while, too. just end it. it makes it easier.
     

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