I haven't truly felt excited about anything since I was head over heels over a girl. Now, recently, I'm a spring admit to college and I moved away from my mom and brothers and few friends I've had. I honestly feel so shitty ever since the move, and it's been a month. I have no roommate yet because there were some issues with the old one moving out, so I'm all alone in this room, and I'm too fucking anxious to even get out of my dorm and socialize. Every time I even try, it's either awkward or a short-lived conversation about nothing important. I can go to frats and party but I just can't get into it and I refrain from drinking so I look even more out of place at parties. I just don't like the whole partying thing. I have no idea what to do with myself. I even keep thinking about my life because I took hGH supplements as a kid and I keep fearing that my heart will fail because it too might have been enlarged. I'm just sitting here wallowing away, depressed, too exhausted to even go crazy and destroy everything in my view. I have no energy to do anything at all. I don't even have interest in anything anymore. This is a new low for me. I've always had a tendency for feeling like shit sometimes, especially trying to get over a bitch for almost a year and a half, but this carries no precedence. I truly have nothing left to hope for. I might, but I'm just too dried up to think rationally. I don't even have friends to confide in.