SRS I feel so alone

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by smokeater270, Nov 27, 2007.

  1. smokeater270

    smokeater270 New Member

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    my own personal hell
    First off, im not an emotional person at all, i dont let feelings get the better of me (i have once with a girl, but that turned out badly so i swore i'd never do it again) and I have a shit ton of friends and people really close to me.

    Anyways, i just feel like I have nothing. Although I have alot of close friends, both female and male, i'm not satisfied. I've never had a girl friend, or a relationship of any sort, im always the really close friend, "That guy," or i date someone for a couple dates and i guess i'm not interesting enough for them, but i have been a little bit of a whore the last couple years. My feeling being, if i get them into bed the first night, they're too easy. No lie, i've had over 30 sexual partners (started 3 years ago, i'm 21) and not one has turned out into a relationship.

    I have calmed down both my whoreishness and my drinking (which used to be out of control bad, like go to school completely hammered drunk on a daily basis) alot (havent had sex with anyone in a couple months), which i am truly proud of. But as of last week, my dream job, which was to be an FDNY firefighter got shot down because I scored poorly on the test, so i relapsed kinda and drank myself stupid over the last 4 days. Today was my first sober day again and i'm just really depressed.


    I know everything is completly jumbled around, but i was just letting thoughts flow, plus this is my first asylum post. I hate getting all emotional, but hey, i guess i needed a release. I'm sure there is mnre, and it'll come out if you pry i think.
     
  2. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Your emotions don't make you weak. They make you human.

    There's no reason to hide from them or stuff them. In fact to do so isn't healthy. I've found that anything that I stuff comes out sideways later on. It's much easier to come to terms with who and what we are and accept that....warts and all. Living a life where you never accept yourself for who and what you truly are is a sure recipe for long term emotional problems.
     
  3. Yuppy

    Yuppy Have a seat right there....

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    yea i know what you mean, id believe the 30 by 21. im 23 and at 78. I had a lot of trouble forming relationships, but eventually i realized its more convenient to just call the girl the next day and hang out more than just once. sometimes you dont have to always have it mean something right away. That takes time to develop.

    I blew it with a really hot chick a couple times. But once in particular kuz I said something about her being too easy. (took me 15 minutes after she got to my house for us to do it the first time)


    So you know what you should give these girls a chance, remember you are being a whore too.
     

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