I feel my ex really messed up my dating life in general and other parts of my life.

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by quamen, Dec 8, 2005.

  1. quamen

    quamen New Member

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    I saw my ex today again, she was in town and we chatted for a few mintues. This is the one girl I really loved so much and she decided to cheat on me one night with her ex bf. I have been thinking about her alot lately, but have also been out dating since we broken up. I havent found a girl yet who i like as much and care for as much as I did for her. Today after i left, I felt like calling her and asking her to hang out sometime. I find out later from a friend, she is in a relationship with someone already, so my chance is out.

    I cant believe a girl can affect my life so much, after she cheated on me. It has been about 6 months or so, and I still think about her to this day. I would take her back even after she cheated becuase i care for her so much. I just feel I need her back, but now cant get her back. I dont know what to do, and i feel like ill never meet anyone that i care for as much or feel the type of connection we had. I feel like my life is just falling down after all of this, i was much happier with her in my life.
     
  2. chlywly

    chlywly Active Member

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    GET OVER IT, stop dwelling you broken fucking telephone, if you don't let go you will not grow and you surelly will enough allow yourself to find NEW opportunity, (female)
     
  3. armond

    armond New Member

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    I made that mistake once, the feeling of being cheated on almost never goes away. It is something you will be reminded of daily when you look/think of the person. I suggest a full break off, no contact, do not CALL/SEE/TALK ABOUT her anymore. It is pointless, you are only hindering yourself and basically preventing yourself from ever being happy again.
     
  4. concertreject2

    concertreject2 New Member

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    i tried staying w/ my ex after i caught him cheating. it was horrible. things are hardly ever the same after a betrayal like that. it's hard now. you think you can't ever feel love like that again, but you can. it just takes a lot of time. and you want to go back because you want that intimate connection again and that's the fastest way to regain it. you need to get over your ex and when you find yourself at the end of the day not having one single thought about her, then you're ready. have faith. you'll find love again.
     
  5. Takumi

    Takumi New Member

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    Don't worry man, it will take a while for you to completely get over your ex, its normal.

    The key is to cut off all contact and get rid of anything that reminds you of her, you need a clean break. And you need to realize that ITS OVER. Don't try and think about second chances or whatever. Just keep telling yourself its over and that you will never be with her again. Don't think "Oh, maybe things will work out again in a year or two" etc etc, you will just prolong the process.

    For myself, I broke up with a gf of 3 years, and it took probably 7-8 months, maybe even a year to completely get over it.
     
  6. Tex

    Tex Now with avatar™

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    If you want to care for something which doesn't give a shit about you, buy a potted plant, man.
     
  7. quamen

    quamen New Member

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    ??????????
     
  8. Tex

    Tex Now with avatar™

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    Thiiiink about it.

    EDIT: Ok, if you really need me to throw you a bone, what I'm basically saying is that this has trouble written all over it. If you try and get back with this girl you care for so much, you'd be getting back with someone who doesn't really care for you (she cheated on you, didn't she? People don't cheat on people they really care about - despite whatever bullshit they spout to convince you otherwise when they come clean/get caught).

    Seriously, the best thing you can do is get her and the idea of getting back with her OUT OF YOUR HEAD PERMANENTLY for your own good. I once felt like you about one of my exes who cheated on me, so I'm speaking from experience here. In hindsight, I can see that my desire to give her a second chance was due to be being whipped and unable to view the situation objectively. A couple of years down the road (we stayed good friends) I had an epiphany one day, and realised that quite simply, she wouldn't have cheated on me if she really cared about me (whether under the influence as she said she was or not). So I cut her out of my life, and it felt good. :)
     
    Last edited: Dec 9, 2005
  9. quamen

    quamen New Member

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    thanks guy for the comments, you are making me realize more and more of my stupidity.
     
  10. bearsdidit

    bearsdidit OT Supporter

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    its not stupidity, its a normal human reaction man. just work through it, things will get better. use this time to better yourself.
     
  11. suckafuhreak

    suckafuhreak New Member

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    stop being gay and go look for someone else. my ex fucked me over and got with my enemy. yeah she hella fucked me up but hey i bounced back. i found someone else and guess what? my ex wants me back cuz i've been treating my new gf the way any women should be. she's madly jealous and i dont give a fuck cuz im over her.
     
  12. GreyRS

    GreyRS Your ignorance cramps my conversation.

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    Move on, she did.

    I know that seems harsh but, it is true. There is a strong possibility that what is keeping you from moving on is a quiet disbelief that she could do so so easily while you can't. You want to know that she felt as strongly for you as you did and that you she just made a mistake. Well, that may or may not be true but it is beyond the time to seek those answers. Let it go. If it requires you having absolutely no contact with her to do it, then that is what you need to do. lastly, do not ever compare any other girl or relationship to her or what the two of you had. it is not fair to whoever you get involved with next.
     
  13. CastorTroy

    CastorTroy New Member

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    The only reason she's affecting your life so much is because your letting her by dwelling on it and hanging onto the past.

    Forget about her and move on, if she cheated on you she's not worth your time anyway.
     
    Last edited: Dec 14, 2005
  14. f3rg

    f3rg New Member

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    I agree with everyone else..

    You need to move on.. Trust me, ive been in this situation very recently..

    You need to start to do new things.. Things you havent done before..
    Go out with friends, partying, rock climbing..

    Dont think about her man, it makes everything harder and you cant move on, and before you know it you wont be thinking about her, but chasing other girls
     

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